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July-September, 2010

A Beautiful Experience of Love

Rev. Cathey Jo Tomilenko

God introduced my husband David to me in October of 1998. He made his transition in 2005. I have lived a life time of blessings in those few years we had together. We were very spiritually connected. Each morning began in prayer and every evening ended in prayer thanking God not only for each other but for every blessing in our lives. Each challenge and experience we shared brought us closer to God, knowing the Holy Spirit was always working through us for our higher good.  We both new that the Holy Spirit is the activity of God working through us all.

When they diagnosed David in December of 2004 with cancer, they told him he had two months to live. Of course at first there is shock. But because of our deep unequivocal Faith that God is the source of everything in our lives, we loved each other through the challenge. He taught me a lot about trust in God when it comes to the challenges we face every day of our lives. In February We were at the hospital for one last test and opinion to see if there was something else to be done. My daughter, son-in-law and I waited patiently, along with David. The doctor came in and with sadness said to the four of us, “I wish I had better news for you but we have done everything we can for you.” The four of us looked at each other with a sad kind of love. David looked at us and with the faith of God within him   said cheerfully, “Well, I guess this body no longer serves a purpose. It is time to leave it.” There was no fear in his eyes as well as his voice. With a smile on his face we left the hospital for our home where his family was waiting for him. Here was a man who at this point was driving, showering, feeding himself, laughing, telling jokes and enjoying his family. I heard him say to my daughter, “I don’t know why everyone is so upset. I am the one leaving this planet.” and laughed.

Two days later on Saturday we had a prayer service at our home where all of his friends could come and pray as a family and say their good-byes to David. We both thought, why wait until I am a total spirit to let them say good bye as well as have the chance to thank them for their friendships and love?  By Sunday afternoon, David could no longer feed himself and could barely speak. It was like he was getting ready to make his transition. Still there was no fear in his eyes or face only peace. His last words to me before he went into a complete coma were, “I love you. Thank you for loving me. Promise me you will finish your classes to become a Minister. It is your dream and when you are Ordained, I promise I will be there.”

In three days I watched him transform to from a fully living person into a silent coma. By Monday he was in a total coma but there still remained peace on his face.  Every once in a while he would open his eyes as if he were looking at something or someone, smile and close them again.  This was Valentines Day and we, as a family, shared our love with one another and continued to tell stories about our experiences with David. Finally at one o’ clock in the morning on Feb. 16th, David took his last breath. My hand was on his heart, his mother was holding one hand, my daughter the other and his son was at his feet. At the moment of his last breath, the color on his face which had been yellow from the cancer, turned normal, full of blushing color as if he were going to wake up at any moment. His face was relaxed and very peaceful. As his family shed the tears, I saw a light surround him and I knew the Holy Spirit was with him.

He was not in fear of dying. He knew it was time and he made his transition with peace and joy, giving thanks for all the blessings in his life. If there was any sadness in him, it was only for a moment. I held him in my arms as we prayed together, both of us saying we knew he was not alone, and that the Love of God was with him as well as the Holy Spirit. The tears lasted for only a moment, and then we looked into each others eyes, knowing the truth of us, that we are spiritual beings having this wonderful human experience with the body as a temporary temple.

It was an incredible experience watching him live the spiritual principles that we both believed in. There is nothing to fear.  He knew it was time to leave and he did so in five days. I will never forget this experience. He taught me never to be afraid of dying or leaving the body temple, for there is only beauty and peace beyond this life; that the Holy Spirit is always with us.

Trust in this truth. David still lives in my heart and so does this experience. I never feel alone. In fact, people thought I didn’t love David because I didn’t break down into hysteria. You see, I know in my heart that we are never alone. I know the Holy Spirit is always with me. I knew when he made his transition that there would only be peace and joy. Because I knew and lived the truth at the time of his transition, like him, I could also be at peace.

By the way, David was at my ordination in Kiel, Wisconsin in August of 2005. When we were married he always played with my hair. Maybe it is because he didn’t have much on top. At the moment I was ordained, I felt someone playing with the hair on the back of my neck. I had to turn around to see who it was. Believe it or not, no one in the physical sense was there. I knew at that moment that David kept his promise and was with me in Spirit.

© 2010, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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