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January-March, 2015

A Reflection of Ideas, Parts 1 & 2

by Rev. Myron Jones, O.M.C.

Part 1

For a long time now I have accepted that I am 100% responsible for my life, and then I realized I was 100% responsible for the world. I understand that if I am aware of something, it is there because I desire it to be there. I can find endless quotes from all the sections of the Course that tell me I do this to myself. For a long time, even though I knew it must be true, I was resistant to it because it made me feel guilty to think about it. As I began to let go of the belief that guilt is real, I could see that responsibility did not imply guilt, and then I started receiving more clarity.

Lesson 152 has long been one of my favorite lessons, even when I was still resisting the idea. In part this is what it says:

No one can suffer loss unless it be his own decision. No one suffers pain except his choice elects this state for him. No one can grieve nor fear nor think him sick unless these are the outcomes that he wants. And no one dies without his own consent. Nothing occurs but represents your wish, and nothing is omitted that you choose. Here is your world, complete in all details. Here is its whole reality for you. And it is only here salvation is.

This is so very clear, and yet I still insisted that someone did it to me, or I am just a victim. I think one of the reasons I could not fully accept it even though I believed it must be true, is that I could not understand how this could be true. I couldn’t understand how I made it happen. There have always been circumstances over which I seemed to have no control. How could they be my responsibility?

Recently, I read Lesson 325 and everything changed for me:

All things I think I see reflect ideas.

This is salvation’s keynote: What I see reflects a process in my mind, which starts with my idea of what I want. From there, the mind makes up an image of the thing the mind desires, judges valuable, and therefore seeks to find. These images are then projected outward, looked upon, esteemed as real and guarded as one’s own. From insane wishes comes an insane world. From judgment comes a world condemned. And from forgiving thoughts a gentle world comes forth, with mercy for the holy Son of God, to offer him a kindly home where he can rest a while before he journeys on, and help his brothers walk ahead with him, and find the way to Heaven and to God.

Finally, I understand how I made the world I see.

I have read this lesson many times, but this time I was ready to accept the full meaning. Immediately, when I read the first phrase, “This is salvation’s keynote” I stopped. What? Did I read that right? How is it I never noticed that important statement? If you look up synonyms for keynote you will find these words: important, crucial, major, essential, central. This lesson is evidently important, no, crucial to salvation.

What I read next explained to me how it is that I made this world and that I am continuing to make it every moment of every day. Everything starts with a thought in my mind, something I believe I want.

“What I see reflects a process in my mind, which starts with my idea of what I want.”

So the first step to making the world I see is to have an idea of something that seems desirable to me. I might start with the idea that I want to win. I want to be the best at what I do. That means I want to overcome my brothers, to beat them, to prove I am better than them.

The next step is this: “From there, the mind makes up an image of the thing the mind desires, judges valuable, and therefore seeks to find.”

So I have an idea of what I want and now I make up an image of the thing I desire. Perhaps that image is something like this. The coworker sitting at the table with me disagrees with my assessment of a situation. I know I am right and I tell everyone at the table why I am right and he is wrong. I use all the facts at my disposal. He has to see my point as does everyone else and so my foe is vanquished. I win!

Now comes the next step: “These images are then projected outward, looked upon, esteemed as real and guarded as one’s own.”

So now I have a clear image of something I desire and think is valuable. I now prove to myself that my desire to win is fulfilled as I project that image outward and it becomes a situation in the life of Myron. The body’s senses seem to prove that I win as I see and hear the confrontation through Myron. That whole episode with the coworker was an image I have made.

To assure myself that I have actually proven my worth through defeating my opponent, I make that image so real and so believable that it is hard to deny. Even knowing what I now know, I experience so much emotion and my image of the coworker is very reactive so that adds to the experience of it. The ego mind argues that I was right and he was wrong and if I didn’t make that clear, there would be consequences.

How could I not argue the point? I was clearly saving myself and the company from his ignorance. It all feels and looks so real, and I feel so justified in what I did. The ego declares me the winner, no, the hero who saved the day. I didn’t make this situation, the ego mind says, I just reacted to a situation that the coworker caused.

Once I have reached that third stage where I project the desired image, I can easily convince myself that I am only reacting to a situation in the world. I now believe that I have to do something about a very real situation in a real world. I have completely hidden from my mind that I made the situation and that it could not have occurred unless I desired that it do so. I have hidden from my awareness that I had a desire, made an image that expressed that desire, and then projected it outward where I could use it to experience my desire.

“From insane wishes comes an insane world. From judgment comes a world condemned.”

The solution to this insane world is to realize that my wishes are insane. Since I read this lesson, I have used it to help me see differently. It is like a fog has lifted and suddenly everything is seen in sharp relief. Next time, I will write about how I am using this lesson and why it has changed everything.

A Reflection of Ideas, Part 2

Lesson 325: “This is salvation’s keynote: What I see reflects a process in my mind, which starts with my idea of what I want. From there, the mind makes up an image of the thing the mind desires, judges valuable, and therefore seeks to find. These images are then projected outward, looked upon, esteemed as real and guarded as one’s own. From insane wishes comes an insane world. From judgment comes a world condemned. And from forgiving thoughts a gentle world comes forth, with mercy for the holy Son of God, to offer him a kindly home where he can rest a while before he journeys on, and help his brothers walk ahead with him, and find the way to Heaven and to God.”

First I understand how I make the world I see… It is a reflection of a process in my mind… It starts with a desire… I make an image of that desire… I judge it valuable. I seek to find it… I project it outward… I look upon it… I decide it is real and I guard it as my own.

I also see that, just as these insane thoughts make an insane world, forgiveness makes a gentle world. I can change the world I see when I change my thoughts. So I am continually creating the world I see.

Knowing this, I started using these ideas. The first thing I did was to begin looking at things differently. I would look at a lamp and the thought in my mind was that this thing is a lamp. I would change that to, “This is an image I have made that I call lamp.” I did this often during the day to help me shift my thinking about the things I see.

The next thing I did was to change the way I see circumstances in my life. The old way of viewing these circumstances went like this. I would have a headache and the ego mind would think of why my head hurts. I would think about the weather, what stress I am under, or if I had enough sleep. I would nervously wonder if this was the beginning of a migraine, and start thinking of possible triggers.

Now, when I noticed something like this, I would stop the process and shift my perspective. I would remember that this headache is an image I have made. It is not real and it did not begin in the world, but began in my mind, and remains in my mind with the rest of the world I have made. I would then ask to see the original desire that sourced the image of Myron with a headache. It is this desire that will point me to the belief that needs to be healed.

I saw the desire to prove the body is real. That desire was coupled with the desire to prove the body is stronger than the mind through making an image of Myron helpless against a migraine. I saw that sometimes the desire was to ground Myron in the illusion by making an image of her running around looking endlessly for solutions to the migraine problem. This, of course, led me to a deeper desire, which was to keep the illusion in place and the ego-self strong in the mind.

In order for all of this to be effective as a believable story that keeps the mind engaged so as not to remember it is only a story, it must be consistent. It doesn’t have to make perfect sense, but it must be logical and coherent. So each time I make an image of a headache, I make that image something believable and something that makes sense to the story.

I make certain triggers, like not enough sleep makes the head hurt. I do this often, and soon, the idea that not enough sleep causes a headache is so fixed in the mind that it seems like an undeniable fact. Now it is harder than ever to refute. That I found a trigger for the headache reinforces that the headache is real and is something separate from my will, and that I must battle it with all my resources.

When, after every effort on my part, I still get headaches, I have proven to myself that I am victim of the body. I have convinced myself that I get headaches and there is nothing I can do about it. I am a frail and weak body and each headache brings to doubt the words I read in the Course that tell me I am God’s Holy Son.

But now that I understand the process, now that I understand why it is that this world I see represents my every wish, I am not fooled by my images. I ask to be shown the original desire, and the belief that desire represents. I have seen how this desire is keeping me in the dream, and is hurting me. I ask that my mind be healed.

Seeing it all so clearly has helped me to truly desire something else. Now that I see what I don’t want, I am asking the Holy Spirit to remove from my mind those beliefs and the desires that source the images I make. And I am learning to make images from the desire to awaken. I will share some other examples later, because I notice that in true ego fashion the mind wants to separate out and make this true for some things, but confuse other things and make it seem like there are exceptions. There aren’t.

© 2015, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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