Miracles News

July-September, 2004

My Mother’s Day Lesson

by Rev. Derek Dube, O.M.C.

Rev. Derek DubeEva and I were baby sitting our granddaughter, Devon, the day before Mother’s Day and decided to take her to the park. Devon loves the park! We parked the car in the lot and while Eva and Devon were getting their jackets on, I walked up the path ahead of them.

Just then, a young boy, aged 8 or 9, came toward me on the path and asked if he could use my cell phone. Now I don’t consider myself to be a prejudiced person, but all kinds of judgmental thoughts came to my mind immediately (you know, those ego sort of thoughts). This boy happened to be black. The judgmental thoughts that instantly came to my mind were from my past experiences of being held up a couple of times, comments that I had heard growing up in my community, and all the stereotypical beliefs that I had bought into over time. They included such thoughts that this kid was telling me a lie, he was going to run away with my phone, he was going to make all kinds of long distant calls, cost me all kinds of money, etc.

I decided to question him a little bit because I was aware that I did not trust him. He told me his family was from out of town and his mom had driven away and left him there without saying anything to him. I thought, “Yeah, right, this is a good story.” I decided that I would call his mom and find out what happened. I dialed the number he gave and when a woman answered, I told her what the boy had told me. She apologized and said she had to make an emergency run to the rest room with her daughter and would be right back. She thanked me for my concern and apologized again. I told the boy what his mom had said, so he sat down on the curb and waited for her to return.

Eva, Devon and I went on to the playground area. While Devon was on the slides, I went over and sat down by myself. I was very aware of a deep feeling of guilt and shame which was causing a pain in my stomach. How could I be filled with such mistrust for a child coming to me for help? I was very critical of myself for being such a “bad” person.

I watched the child out of the corner of my eye as he sat on the curb waiting for his mother to come back. In hindsight, I could see how calm and peaceful he was when talking to me. He had a lot of courage to come up to me and gently ask for help. I also noticed how calm he was and he smiled a lot. In a few minutes, the boy’s mother came back and he and his sister joined her on the path towards the playground.

I didn’t know what to do. Should I go over and talk to them, see if everything was all right? I felt a paralyzing feeling in my body, I couldn’t do anything. I wanted to go over and apologize, but I couldn’t move. I was a victim of my own self-criticism and it seemed overwhelming. Eva noticed the family and told me she was going over to talk to them. I wanted to go over and talk to them too. Somehow, Eva saying that gave me the strength to stand up and walk over to them with her. I apologized to the boy for not trusting him and thanked him for his courage. We small talked with the family for a few minutes and then went back to our own activities.

Later that night after contemplating the events at the park, I realized how accepting and peaceful the mom and her two children were and how I was in the loving energy that they were extending outward. I felt no judgment coming from them in any way. I got the feeling that this mom was a very loving person and was modeling that to her children. The only gifts I received from them were smiles, love, acceptance, understanding and ……. I can’t really think of the perfect word for what I experienced in that moment, but it was simply beautiful. I truly feel that on the Saturday before Mother’s Day, 2004, I was visited by three angels who were there to gently help me release some old, unconscious baggage that has needed to be let go of for a long, long time. I’m very grateful for the experience I was gifted and for Eva’s part in the nudging me over to talk to them.

Derek Dube is a Pathways of Light minister living in Brookfield Wisconsin.

© 2004, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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