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October - December, 2005

Releasing the Reigns: Letting God Plan Our Future

by Rev. Cheryl Ford

To plan or not to plan, that is the question.

It seems that more and more my husband and I are resisting the temptation to plan out our future. Prague is beautiful, but we only “planned” to stay here for the summer. Then, although we’ve decided that we are going to let our future “plans” be lead by Holy Spirit, our conversations always seem to meander over to “planning” where we will go next and what we will do when we get there…

Usually, we catch ourselves after lengthy discussions of this type and remember that we are committed to following Spirit’s guidance and find peace for the moment. Yet, our conversations, more often than not, gravitate back to planning something or other.

In our minds, we know that planning is actually impossible because the future does not even exist and there is no way for anyone to even guess at what could happen next in this crazy illusion we call life on earth. Even the Course teaches that planning is the sign of an unhealed mind. Still, we seem to find some weird comfort in our own make believe ability to “call the shots” and create “our own destiny.”

Personally and professionally, I’ve always been a “control freak.” For me, it’s a natural response to want to take pencil and paper in hand and sort through the bills, make lists of goals, visualize my “perfect life,” strategize, etc. It makes me feel in control, which I surmise is what “control freaks” like to feel. And, I notice that when I am not attempting to plan every aspect of my life, I sometimes feel a sense of anxiety, or a feeling of drifting aimlessly. But then I realize that these feelings are only symptoms of my madness…

In reality, there is no “future” to plan. There is only now. In fact, any plans I attempt to make are simply projections of my past; figments of my imagination. To live in the moment is the only real choice I can make. Holy Spirit has been making it easier for me to develop this form of trust by always being available to lead the way. Actually, any worry I’ve experienced about the future is always only completely fear based. Fear of loss, fear of bodily injury, fear of regret, all kinds of nasty fears dancing in my head (like naughty little sugar plum fairies). But when I still my mind and open to Spirit, I am gently reminded that love dispels all fear and in this recollection, I am filled with peace.

When I am feeling completely peaceful, I am also reminded by Spirit that my future is in God’s Hands. Not only does God hold my future in His Hands, but my past and present as well. They are all one to Him because in reality, there is no such thing as time, and as the Course says, “What worry can beset the one who gives his future to the loving Hands of God? For in God’s Hands, we rest untroubled, sure that only good can come to us.” (W-pI.194.7:1&9:2)

“Resting untroubled” in this way is new to me. Although I’ve known for a long time that placing my future in God’s Hands is what I “should” do, it’s not what I actually did for the most part of my life. Now, I’m finding that my situation is creating tons of good opportunities for me to practice this idea.

For example, trust is something I have needed to work on for quite awhile. Feeling comfortable in God’s Grace has been a concept that I’d experienced glimpses of during holy instants, but I would always find myself slipping back into habitual worrying and fearful thinking, trying to “plan” myself back into sanity. But now, by trusting in God’s plan and not my own, I’m finally feeling that I’m truly learning to appreciate God’s Grace and I am fully accepting His Gifts.

I notice, however, that my greatest moments of learning, especially in trusting the future to God, is when I’m doing absolutely nothing. When I’m not thinking, planning, analyzing or strategizing, but just being in the moment or relaxing with my family. Often, it’s during those times that I am flooded with the feeling that Heaven is in my mind, God is good, and that all is well with the world… What more is there to know?

Along the same note, during the summer months, the days here in Prague Chechoslovika have been mild and pleasant. Our bedroom window faces “Petrin Hill,” a beautiful, green hillside that overlooks a convent and a monastery. I enjoy watching the nuns and monks walk the grounds, work in their garden or hang sheets to dry. But the best thing is the sound of all the bells that ring throughout the day. Sometimes they play out a tune; sometimes they just chime out the time, or perhaps announce a mass. Whatever the reason, hearing these bells always seems to make me feel that everything is all right. In fact, I’ve chosen to use their clear ringing as a personal reminder to call on Spirit throughout the day, recall the daily lesson, or simply as a reminder to remain present.

© 2005, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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