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October-December, 2014

Seek Only Peace

by Rev. Michael Graves, O.M.C.

I am so grateful for the many wonderful changes that have taken place in my life since enrolling in the Pathways of Light Ordained Ministerial Counselor program. Now that I have worked through most of the lessons and ordination is near, I am amused as I think back and remember all of the reasons that I originally came up with for deciding to enroll in this life changing program.

I had recently retired at what I consider to be a relatively young age from a career in middle management with a local water company. Things began to get politically difficult for me as it became quite obvious that I was no longer working for the same, family oriented company I went to work for some 25 years ago. I had worked long enough to leave with a full pension and benefits for my wife and I so I decided to retire and see what was next for me.

I took advantage of the extra time that retirement provided to study A Course in Miracles more seriously both on my own and with study groups in my area and even started hosting a group in my home.

I still wanted to do some type of work and earn some extra money to eliminate the rest of our debt so my wife could retire as well, but I wasn’t quite sure what it would be. But whatever it was, I was committed to making sure that this time around, it was something that I really enjoyed.

I have been very active in 12-step recovery programs for the last 20 years. I especially love working with others as a sponsor or a trusted friend, helping them work through some of the issues in their lives, most of which, are issues I have worked through in my own life.

People I had worked with or who knew me well would often tell me that I would make a good counselor. I did notice that I had the ability to completely put aside my own thoughts, feelings and judgments about their situation and really listen to what they were telling me and then give them very objective, clear and helpful feedback. I remember feeling more like a “channel” when I responded to them. The information seemed to come “through” me rather than “from” me. But wherever it came from, I really loved being a part of it.

So, at 57 years old I considered going back to college to become a licensed therapist, but I felt that with the expense and the time I would need to finish my education and internship, it would not be an option for me. So, I became a certified life coach and decided to specialize in recovery, relationships and spirituality coaching as a way to do this thing I loved doing on a more professional level.

One day a friend of mine, told me about Pathways and the Ordained Ministerial Counselor (OMC) program. I went to the website to check it out and thought that it would be the perfect complement to my coaching practice and decided to enroll. And of course, I decided that in addition to the OMC program, I had to go on and do the Spiritual Relationships Counseling course as well.

I am sure that you have guessed by now, what I discovered was the real reason I was led to study to become a minister. It had very little to do with how it would complement my new business and benefit my clients, and had everything to do with the fact that Spirit knew I needed to do this healing work for myself.

When I shared what I was learning with my wife Becky, who knows me very well, she would say, it is clear to me that the lessons in this OMC program are really more about helping to heal you than anybody else. She couldn’t have been more right.

As ministerial candidates we were encouraged by the Pathways staff ministers to be careful about thinking too much about what our ministries will look like. They told us that it often ends up looking very different than what we had imagined. My personal facilitator told me the same thing when she shared her experience with me.

Today I try to let go of my attachments to my thoughts and plans in all areas of my life, step back and follow Spirit’s lead. If you are anything like me, you already know how difficult this can be to do consistently. I like to say that now I only walk through doors Spirit has opened for me. In the past, I have broken open doors to rooms I thought I wanted to be in, only to end up asking myself how in the heck I got in there?

For me, the most helpful (and easiest to remember) thing I have learned in my studies thus far is that each of us has a built in “early warning system” that lets us know when we have gotten off track and need to choose again. It is called Peace. Most of us are familiar with the last words in chapter five of the Text that starts out by saying; “I must have chosen wrongly because I am not at peace. I made this decision myself, but I can also decide otherwise.” It is also on a focus card that was in one of the lessons in the curriculum that still hangs on my mirror. In the concordance of A Course in Miracles, the word peace is one of the most often used — 999 times!

In course 1001: Course Facilitator Training, Part I Teleconference we were asked to describe what attributes a peaceful person might have and what they might be like. My friend and fellow ministerial candidate Michelle suggested that I share with you what came to me as I meditated on the question.

A peaceful person believes that all is well and always will be well. They know that the forms things take in the world are not real and will always change. They know that forms are not the key to their happiness or their pain and that they literally do not matter. They believe that their brothers and sisters are perfect, sinless children of God like themselves. They have learned to look past fearful expressions and behavior to see the innocence in others. They release their fears to the Holy Spirit for gentle, natural healing and correction. 

I am actually starting to really understand the statement in the preface of the Course under What It Says: “Nothing real can be threatened. Nothing unreal exists. Herein lies the peace of God”

Now when I look back on my life, I can do it with a compassion for myself that I didn’t have before. I can clearly see now that peace is all I have ever been trying to find in life and I was mistaken in thinking that I could find it in anything or anyone in the world of form.

So, while I can’t tell you exactly how my life will look after ordination, I can tell you that it will be fun, it will be perfect and it will be what is meant to be.

In chapter 18 of the Text it says:  “If you knew who walked beside you on the way that you have chosen, fear would impossible.” So, if fear is impossible, it can only be love, right?

© 2014, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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