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July-September, 2018

What I Hear My Brother Say Is Up to Me

by Rev. Myron Jones, O.M.C.

It is, therefore, your choice whether they support the ego or the Holy Spirit in you. And you will recognize which you have chosen by their reactions. (T-15:II.4:5)

I asked the Holy Spirit for an example of this so that I could understand it better. How can it be my choice whether my brother witnesses to the ego or the Holy Spirit? He immediately brought to mind someone I used to work for. I didn’t like or trust this man. Everything he said or did reflected my dislike for him. His words to me, and his actions toward me, seemed to be an attack and I did not feel safe around him. I always expected him to fire me at any moment, and each attack seemed like a preamble to that.

What I did not see at that time is that I had an ego-driven attitude toward him and he was reflecting this back to me. My ego and his ego seemed to be in a pitched battle all the time. The loss of peace this caused me was too much for me to bear, and so I finally decided to end the war. I asked the Holy Spirit to show me a different way to see this man. I told Him I wanted to love this man.

My intention set the stage for the Holy Spirit in me to communicate with the Holy Spirit in Him, and the only communication the Holy Spirit knows is love. Very quickly, I began to notice so many good qualities in him. I began to enjoy our conversations and I found him very easy to work with. His words seemed kind and conciliatory.

It was as Jesus said: “It is, therefore, your choice whether they support the ego or the Holy Spirit in you. And you will recognize which you have chosen by their reactions.” Well I certainly saw a change in communication with him. Perhaps he was always the man I came to know and I simply heard from him what I expected to hear. When I changed my mind about supporting the ego in me, how I heard his words changed. It is a lesson I am not going to quickly forget.
Learning to Accept Magnitude

I find it very reassuring to know that the Holy Spirit can keep my magnitude clean of arrogance. I want to live in my magnitude but not let it be tainted by the ego needs and desires. In the past, I tended to play small because I was afraid of this. I was afraid to claim the power of God in me, afraid my ego mind would be using it. This was because I was not yet clearly identified with my Self and still often I identified as my ego. Now, it is the other way around, and I am clear that the ego is on the way out, and I am not afraid of it anymore.

For the Holy Spirit to guard my magnitude, I must watch the decisions I make about myself and let Him decide for God for me. For instance, I am a minister, a teacher, and an author. If I decide that makes me special and that people should treat me special because of it, I am deciding against God. I am using my gifts to inflate my littleness to give me a false sense of magnitude.

If this were to happen, I would ask the Holy Spirit to correct my thinking by deciding for God for me. This is how I do my part to side with the Holy Spirit. I simply give Him permission to correct me when I am misusing the power of God that is in me. I feel pretty safe with this power now. I know the difference now between being arrogant and being truly humble. I feel safe claiming magnitude because I am happy that I am being used for His purposes and I know that I am not useful through the ego self, but through my surrender of the ego self.

I do join with you, Jesus, in deciding for holiness for me. I will work with you to restore the awareness of magnitude. Here I am, Lord. Give Yourself through me. I surrender the little self that I have so long treasured so that there is nothing blocking You. I think of the power of God working through me to help complete the task Jesus chose for himself and I am flooded with joy. There is nothing I want more than to know myself as the host to God.

© 2018, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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