April-June, 2004
We recently received an inspiring and enthusiastic communication from Marshall Spall, a Pathways minister who lives in Saskatchewan, Canada. Below he honestly shares with us the importance of his learning to let go of his willfulness and accepting Holy Spirit’s miracles by not deciding what anything means on his own. We thank Marshall for this helpful message that is important to us all:
I have been making incredible leaps and bounds with my understanding of A Course in Miracles. There was a time when all I really wanted was just to feel better about my life, which I felt was pretty bad. Heck, lets face it, I had some really hard breaks in my life and had used that to further gain support from individuals that would buy into my “dream of self victimization.” This went on for quite some time — quite some time.
I do not know when it came about but what happened was the realization that the Course was really telling us that there is nothing to run away from. By being with the pain and experiencing it without giving my answer to try to solve the pain, and letting go of practicing willfulness, my mind was able to enter the miracle ready state.
My painful situations have become an opportunity in learning how not to practice self autonomy so that the natural occurrence of the miracle can cause a shift in my consciousness and what I thought before is gone.
I do not think it was by chance it was named A Course in Miracles, but more importantly, A Course in Miracles is a course in learning how to be in the miracle-ready state of mind and that is all that is needed for the miracle to occur.
Now I have learned to step back and ask my Father for a new way to see the things that I feel pain over. I wait in quiet expectancy for my Father’s answer — not as I would have it be according to the way I think would answer my pain, but in the acceptance that I do not know what I am going to do in the situation.
In effect I am abandoning my plan and relinquishing my willfulness. The miracle then occurs for me. I have found that the absence of willfulness is the prerequisite for the miracle-minded state of being that allows for the manifestation of the miracle to occur.
My will was to run away from my problems or pain through trying to define the problem and answer. And here all this time the answer was the miracle.
Rev. Marshall Spall is a Pathways of Light minister living in Saskatchewan, Canada.
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