Miracles News

July-September, 2004

Holy Spirit — Take the Lead

by Rev. Linda Wisniewski, O.M.C.

Rev. Linda Wisniewski My daughter just celebrated her 30th birthday and her husband gave her a party which my husband and I attended, along with the in-laws, my ex-husband, his wife and my other daughter. It’s been a long time since I have been with the in-laws and the ex. In the past, everyone was tense and suffered silently, and sometimes not so silently, during these uncomfortable getogethers.

In addition to the birthday celebration, all the grandparents were looking forward to spending time with our two young grandchildren, Ben five years old and Mia Dora, six months old. All the grandparents live out of state and don’t get to see the grandchildren that often. I felt nervous about the visit as my ex and I never had the best of relationships, and my daughter’s in-laws and I are neutral and polite with each other. I also felt sad because I knew I wouldn’t be getting to spend as much time with the children as I would have loved.

However, since coming to Pathways, I am learning that whenever I am experiencing worry, fear, anxiety or trying to control the outcome of things, I am being controlled by ego and there could be no peaceful resolution.

I spent the week before the party asking Holy Spirit to assist me in being in a state of peace and to help me extend love equally to all during the visit. I asked Holy Spirit to help me see and revere the Spirit within my daughter’s in-laws and in my “ex” and his wife. The Course teaches that “either person in a relationship can move it toward a holy one. The desire for peace and the willingness to forgive simply have to be greater than the wish to be right and in control.”

I also asked Holy Spirit to help me let go of my need to control how much time I would spend with Ben and help me to trust that whatever happened during the weekend would turn out perfectly as long as I let go and allowed myself to be led by Holy Spirit. I thanked Holy Spirit for giving me an opportunity to practice extending love equally to all and giving me another chance to experience his love and peace. I asked Holy Spirit to forgive myself and my ex, and release us from guilt over the past. As I prayed and put my ex, his wife and the in-laws in the Light, I saw us all coming together in a circle of love. I felt myself softening and relaxing in the presence of Holy Spirit’s love for me.

When I arrived at my daughter’s, I greeted the in-laws and the “ex” and his wife with warmth and hugs that I sincerely wanted to extend. My daughter immediately informed me that the in-laws would be taking care of Ben Friday evening and Saturday, during the day, and my husband I would watch Ben and Mia Saturday even-ing during the Party. When I heard this, I could feel myself tightening and feeling disappointed. I could feel irritability rising up in me trying to take me over. I observed the tension rising within me but I was learning I had a choice. I could choose ego and be miserable and create misery for my daughter or I could choose Holy Spirit’s way; let go and trust that Holy Spirit knows what’s best. I prayed on the spot and asked Holy Spirit to take the lead. Almost immediately, I again felt myself relaxing and could feel the tension and irritability dissolving.

So, on Friday evening I looked forward to returning to the hotel and resting. It had been a long seven hour drive. I was also planning to relax on Saturday so I would have energy to watch the children Saturday evening. Our room was next door to the in-laws where Ben would be spending the evening. However, with Holy Spirit’s help, I allowed peace to wash over me.

Just as I was about to get into my p.j.’s, my son-in-law knocked on the door. When I opened it, Ben was there also. It seemed his parents wanted to go to sleep. They were tired and Eric, my son-in-law asked if it would be all right if Ben stayed with us. He was looking forward to going to the pool and spending time in the hotel. My husband and I were overjoyed. We had so much fun in the pool with Ben.

The next morning, I called my daughter and asked where we should take Ben. She said the in-laws went out to eat and were going shopping and could we take Ben for the day while they prepared for the party. Again we felt overjoyed and had another wonderful day with Ben and a wonderful evening with Ben and Mia.

I approached the weekend nervous and tense, wondering how things would work out with my ex and the in-laws. But I placed my trust in Holy Spirit, which allowed me to relax and respond with love. Everyone was friendly, my daughter enjoyed the party and the outcome couldn’t have turned out better. I returned home feeling fresh and relaxed, grateful that I made the choice to allow Holy Spirit to lead and I follow in trust. As the Course says, “It is far better to acknowledge the ego’s presence but then rely instead on the Holy Spirit for specific response to the twists and turns in Life. Making this choice changes every detail of every experience we’ll have, now and forever.”

Spending more time with my grandchildren was icing on the cake. But, the real lesson was letting go and letting Holy Spirit take the lead and, placing the present, past and future in the hands of God.

Rev. Linda Wisniewski is a Pathways of Light minister living in Plymouth, Wisconsin.

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