Miracles News

April-June, 2011

Practicing Forgiveness

by Rev. Joanne Schneider, PhD

UGH, the dreaded!! Faulty purchases!

So I bought a blow-up piece of exercise equipment online and after I got it out of the box and tried for some time to blow it up, I noticed that it was missing one rubber foot, which allowed air to escape. I looked through the box it came in and it was empty. I looked through the plastic that wrapped it; it was not there. Okay, no problem. I will simply call the phone number on the instruction booklet and the parts representative will send me one with no problems, after all, it is just a little rubber foot, one of six on the bottom of this piece of equipment.

So I called. The woman said I had to have the receipt. Searching my mind I do not remember seeing it anywhere so I said I do not have the receipt. She could not send me the foot if I did not have the receipt. But what if it had been a gift, I proclaimed. Well, most people include gift receipts, she retorted. Well, after some back and forth and some discomfort, she agreed to send me the foot “this time,” but I would receive no other support in the future without a receipt.

Ugh! After hanging up, I was certainly not at peace. I had let this illusionary situation disturb my peace. And, as I usually do, I went about my business without checking in with Spirit, but in the back of my mind I was aware of the discomfort within. Finally I stopped “my business” and went to Spirit.

Yes, I was angry with her; I recognized that. My mind told me I was in a world of illusions, but I was still angry. And forgiveness is “the means by which illusions disappear.” (W-pt I.46.2:5) But when I sat for a minute and searched my mind, I was even angrier with myself. I did not remember the Spirit at all during my conversation with the representative! I failed again! Deep down I could see that I thought this meant I was not worthy of God. That whole idea of not being saved even popped into my mind. At the same time I also knew that this was my strong ego speaking. Nonetheless, the thoughts were disturbing my peace.

Interestingly, or maybe I should say, fortunately, the lesson I was practicing that day was Lesson 46, “God is the Love in which I forgive.” So as the Course instructs, I closed my eyes and searched my mind for those whom I had not forgiven. (W-pt I.46.3:3)

Ah, no problem there. Instantly the parts representative came to mind. “God is the Love in which I forgive you,” (W-pI.46.4:4) I repeated. And the next sentence of Lesson 46 drove the point home. “The purpose of the first phase of today’s practice periods is to put you in a position to forgive yourself.” (W-pI.46.5:1) “God is the Love in which I forgive myself.” (W-pI.46.5:3) “God is the Love in which I am blessed.” (W-pI.46.5:6) I felt resistance when I repeated these words, but I continued. And, because I must forgive entirely or not at all, (W-pI.46.3:5) I practiced several times that day and the next.

Clearly I have more work to do with forgiveness. Undoubtedly I will have more chances. In fact, before the day was done, I got a cable bill that was $30 higher than expected. Thankfully, I have to call the cable representative giving me another opportunity to practice forgiveness.

Rev. Joanne Kraenzle Schneider is a Pathways of Light minister living in Festus, Missouri.

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