Lesson 87
(73) I will there be light.
(74) There is no will but God’s.
As I wrote those two lines, I thought, “Woah! If I will there be light and there is no will but God’s, my will must be the same will as God’s.” And immediately, I thought, “Right. This from the woman who can’t decide on a diet and stick to it for two days in a row.” But, no, that’s not right. It is not my will that I lose weight or I would.
It is not my ego will that is in alignment with God’s Will. We are talking about my true self here. I use my ego will to get up in the morning and I guess it helps me with my spiritual practice as well. It is the ego drive to finish what I start that is helpful in this instance. But the ego does not will there be light. The ego doesn’t want light because it operates only in darkness.
I say, “Let there be Light,” and the ego says, “Don’t be ridiculous. Are there any more of those chocolate bars?” I compromise and eat an Atkins Bar but I also come back to the lesson and remember that this cannot hide the light I will to see.
Regina’s Tips
As mentioned in yesterday’s tip, discouragement is of the ego. It is a very successful ego trick, because it can lead us to let go of the practice that awakens.
“But I can promise you, if you will take up such a path – simply, joyfully, gently, patiently – the end of your journey is certain.”
My thoughts
Of the quotes given by Regina, that was the one that spoke to me. It is my path, gentle and patient. Well, gentle, anyway. Patience came after I realized that struggle and impatience wasn’t helping. Now I take it a step at a time and the path itself has become more joyous as I have done so. This more laid back approach does not preclude effort.
I do this work more vigilantly than ever before and it is the focus of my life. The difference now is that I do it without a lot of moaning and hair pulling. I am just walking forward a step at a time knowing that the end is certain even if the timing is yet unknow.
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