I. The Two Uses of Time, P 14
14 How long is an instant? As long as it takes to re-establish perfect sanity, perfect peace and perfect love for everyone, for God and for yourself. As long as it takes to remember immortality, and your immortal creations who share it with you. As long as it takes to exchange hell for Heaven. Long enough to transcend all of the ego’s making, and ascend unto your Father.
Journal
I suppose that from my point of view, mired in time/space, it takes a long time to reach that holy instant. I have spent over half of my life, 36 years, deciding that I want to be what I am. In reality, it seems, no time at all has passed. I cannot be other than what I am and everything to the contrary is a dream, an illusion, and never existed at all.
I am not anxious to awaken, but I am determined to awaken and I long to awaken. I want to leave behind this dream experience, and live as I was created to live. I sometimes get frustrated with myself when I ask the ego self to decide for me. But I am also aware that this doesn’t happen as much and that I change my mind fairly quickly now when it does.
In fact, even in the smallest things, I am learning to turn away from the thinking mind and allow myself to be led by the truest part of me. For instance, I was making my bed a few minutes ago and thinking that I want to listen to a teacher while I clean my house. Then I thought about it being Tuesday and my daughter is probably going to call me to visit with her.
I began to go over the pros and cons and to feel uneasy as I did it. Then I caught myself and I changed my mind. I am surrendered to my higher self, and to life as it plays out. I am going to do what comes next and I look forward to seeing how that unfolds. I am not going to fight life today. Instead, I am going to watch it and let the Holy Spirit direct it and interpret it for me.
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