V. The “Dynamics” of the Ego, P 4
4 When we look at the ego, then, we are not considering dynamics but delusions. You can surely regard a delusional system without fear, for it cannot have any effects if its source is not real. Fear becomes more obviously inappropriate if you recognize the ego’s goal, which is so clearly senseless that any effort on its behalf is necessarily expended on nothing. The ego’s goal is quite explicitly ego autonomy. From the beginning, then, its purpose is to be separate, sufficient unto itself and independent of any power except its own. This is why it is the symbol of separation.
Journal
The ego’s goal is ego autonomy, to be independent of any power except its own. This is why I am surrendered to the Higher Power. I am learning what it means to be fully surrendered as I do this practice. Coincidentally, I wrote about this in my Daily Lesson Journal this morning. I am learning to surrender my thoughts, my worries, my life.
I give this body to Jesus to use for the Atonement Plan. I go where I am directed to go, say what I am directed to say. I surrender this mind to the Holy Spirit to heal. I have stopped trying to control the monkey mind with all its nonsense chatter; I have simply surrendered it to the Holy Spirit Who knows what to do with it. When the idle chatter starts up with worries and defenses, I remember I am not interested in defending myself. I have surrendered myself and so this is no longer my business.
If the ego’s goal is to be autonomous, then the way out of separation is to surrender to the other Power. So that is what I am doing. I see that it must be full surrender, holding nothing back for my own use. It is those places in my life that I hesitate to surrender that I most need to surrender. They are the hooks that give the ego something to hold onto. Something that I notice is that the more completely I surrender, the more peaceful and happy I am.
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