IV. THE FUNCTION OF TIME P 6
6 The shadowy figures from the past are precisely what you must escape. They are not real, and have no hold over you unless you bring them with you. They carry the spots of pain in your mind, directing you to attack in the present in retaliation for a past that is no more. And this decision is one of future pain. Unless you learn that past pain is an illusion, you are choosing a future of illusions and losing the many opportunities you could find for release in the present. The ego would preserve your nightmares, and prevent you from awakening and understanding they are past. Would you recognize a holy encounter if you are merely perceiving it as a meeting with your own past? For you would be meeting no one, and the sharing of salvation, which makes the encounter holy, would be excluded from your sight. The Holy Spirit teaches that you always meet yourself, and the encounter is holy because you are. The ego teaches that you always encounter your past, and because your dreams were not holy, the future cannot be, and the present is without meaning.
Journal
I had a remarkable experience of allowing the mind to slip out of the past and into the present, and in so doing, I had a holy encounter. I ran into a competitor at the recent conference. I had always avoided him because he represented danger to me. He could take my customers and I felt this would diminish me. So he was the enemy and to be defended against. Even when he was nice, I distrusted his behavior and felt like it was a ruse to get me talking and to reveal something he could use against me.
All this to say that I had a belief about him and I carried it around, never questioning it and so never letting it be healed. Thus I had no idea of who he was in any one moment. How could I? I shielded myself from this opportunity to know him by choosing to believe the past was real. But last week something happened because I have been practicing the Rules for Decision so vigilantly that they have become natural and automatic.
I was walking down the aisle at the conference, checking out the vendors there and what they had to offer. I ran into this competitor and suddenly saw him without my past beliefs intruding on the situation. I waited for a moment to speak to him alone not knowing what I would say, only knowing that this was not my competitor, but my brother.
When I had the chance to speak to him, I told him I was retiring soon and wanted him to know that I held him in high regard. Those were not my exact words which I cannot really remember but it is the essence of the conversation. He looked very surprised and also pleased. We shook hands and went on our way, forever changed. I am so blessed to have had that holy encounter instead of staying stuck in false beliefs of a past. Thank you, Jesus for A Course in Miracles. Thank you, my brother, for your love and your help.
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