I had been wondering what causes me to perceive or make someone into a ‘special’ person.
I had been thinking of a friend that I met through a spiritual group. Within this group we had been given a tool to look at pain (body or mental) and discover the underlying belief that made the pain. I was going to do something at the computer, then I felt a pain between the shoulder blades. I moved to the couch, and used the practice to look at the perceived cause of the pain. (Note: after the Inner Wisdom Counseling, I never experienced that pain again.)
I was led to a past life. In that seeming life as a native american, I was seen as a threat by a young man, who thought that killing me, would protect him and the camp from further troubles. He put a hatchet in my back. I held no condemnation of him. After my death, another woman came from the camp and performed the rituals of our tribe on the body. I felt very connected to her, and in her understanding with lack of fear, she guided me to go to the light when it was time. She affirmed that there was no distance between us and that we were forever connected by Spirit, in Spirit. I felt such over whelming gratitude and love. A piece of unworthiness was healed. Then I asked my Inner Guidance if I knew this person now, and was told yes, I asked if it was Judi, and was affirmed yes.
Now the rest of the story. The ego mind then put Judi in the “special” category — — that she was more “worthy” than others of friendship, that we shared a deeper connection. This is the ego’s fantasy. This is what the ego’s story has us constantly seeking for. Yet this story is nothing. We chose to forget our creation by a Father that knows nothing of separation. What He did not create or think of, does not exist!
It would indeed be Heaven on earth if we loved one another with the conviction that the”other” that I see is forever part of me or one with me. God’s children are totally equal, without distinctions, wholly lovable and wholly loving. If anyone I “see” or think of would be recognized as being my own holy Self there could be no separate identities. That body/being is simply me playing another role in the game I have dreamed.
The special love I thought I had with a “special other” was another call to choose again. To wake from the dream or fantasy of special perceptions. To the undeniable truth of the connection of Love with Love. To imagine a home or world with the complete understanding that the individual before me or in my thoughts is only an expression of Love, is to be free of hell (guilt) and being One with Creation.
Until I truly give up identifying myself with a body, I continue with the daily practice, daily reminders of truth, of Love. I do notice that when I am acting in a non-judging or gentle way that do feel safe and calm. I practice being open to my holy Guide and follow It’s perfect direction that leads me to peace. Looking with the eyes of Love I experience peace.
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