To me, this journal entry reflects the willingness to see things differently, and the gift that is received and given.
Me: Holy Spirit, how can I look at or feel the things that I’ve hidden, so that I can give them to you? The ego feels very threatened in this.
Spirit: “That is the belief that you are not lovable, not accepted as you are right now.”
Me: I would like to let this belief go, now and forever. Please help me in this. I want to recognize and release those thoughts that block my awareness of Love, I want to remember Love.
Spirit: “When you are the dreamer of the dream but do not realize it, then everything that happens seems to come from"outside” of you. You seem to have no control over the circumstance or others. Yet you are the dreamer. In your mind you have made a world, filled it with bodies and billions of stories. And then you have forgotten that you made up the dream, and all the actors in it.
If you are the dreamer, then nothing can be “done” to you. Nothing can happen without your wish for it to be.
“When you took your journey from one state to another, you had no plan, no idea what would happen, yet you felt loved and guided. It was the choice in your mind that made it seem to be a positive step forward. It was your choice to “see” it as a wholly helpful move, for this was the wish you held. You also thought that by making a physical move, that you could leave your past behind, and the roles that others seemed to have placed you in…..but it was only you that put “you” into certain roles or identities. It is you that have made the world what it seems to be…. and you can learn that it is not so.”
Two days after this dialog with Spirit, I had a sleeping dream in which I was given the idea that I am ALL the actors that I see in my waking dream. I am the projector and dreamer of the movie I seem to be involved in. My delusional mind has made up all other players, and acts out those roles, and instantly forgets that it has done so. All the actors simply show me my hidden thoughts that need correction, or they reflect the Love that I am behind all the masks and denial I have made. Every time I am able to look beyond the mask of an actor, I can choose to forgive the thought that made him/her. I cannot find my way out of the dream/movie without direction from One who sees what is true and what is false. I can depend on this Inner Director to guide me, as He gives me only truth. I let the false go, as easily as dropping a robe from my shoulders. I can let go of the false as I recognize that this movie has never brought me peace, joy or love. When I look with my Director, I see with eyes of Love, that gives me unlimited vision.
I am forever grateful for this Director Who holds the truth for me and helps me see beyond the movie/dream!
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