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Sept.-Dec., 2024

Dead Ends

by Rev. Krista Kemp, Ordained Ministerial Counselor

Although this title may not evoke inspiration and comfort, bear with me as I travel my latest journey of melding the teaching of the Course with the “realness” of death. Recently, I’ve been faced with the death of close family members while simultaneously involved in the course 909: Wellness Through Mind Healing.

Although it is not after having experienced both that I have uncovered that there is no coincidence that this has been presented to me in this way.

Death was not something I gave much thought to. It was only when I was faced with the death of my father in 2001 that I even allowed in the thoughts of death and dying and what this means. As with any journey, it begins with a question… mine stemming from a great feeling of loss and pain.

I needed to believe that there was more to life than dying. My dad was a minister of the church and with this came the expectation I had around his level of faith and the healing that I was convinced was going to occur. But it didn’t. He was in a human body, a body that was failing.

It wasn’t until I discovered ACIM, many years later, that I began to experience a new and deeper level of understanding, not just about death but bodies in general. This new understanding does not mean I do not grieve, but I am now experiencing a new depth of comfort I did not and would not have experienced prior.

My body meant I was alive, right? What does living mean? Why do we get sick? And why do we die? All this initially felt like a “dead end.” I did not know where to go and felt stuck.

It wasn’t until ACIM and now the 909 course, where I explored sickness and death, that I realized I was spending a lot of time and energy focused on my body. Mainly, what it does and doesn’t do, mostly it is when I feel it is not working “right” that I think about it the most.

I began to focus on being sick. It was challenging when I used to have to stand by and watch my family members’ bodies fade away. I recalled praying for their healing and wondering why God has not answered my prayers, especially since my dad was a man of the cloth.

I learned later at my most recent aunt’s funeral, that he had a better understanding of his relationship with God than I did. I was clearly consumed more with my sadness at the losing of him than where he was in his spiritual journey with God.

In preparing to speak at my aunt’s funeral recently, I discovered a message my dad had written. Although I do not know the context for which it was written, I would like to share with you now some of what he wrote and how it aligns with the Course.

He believed that the Church for him was the living body of Christ, and he believed it was to spread the Good News. He shared how even with all our technology, nothing was stopping death and that death would take his beloved friend, and young baby, as well as a 100 year old man. He proclaimed, “I don’t ask “Why God?” anymore, but I ask What? What can I pass on to my children and friends so that they will know that this is not the end of things. What can I possibly say or do to help them understand that the world is full of “dead ends” and that you, God, provide the way, the Truth, and the Life.”

In this I feel he is talking about sharing the good news that we are not bodies, we are eternal as God has made us. We are not a body and when the time comes, we get to lay our bodies down to fully remember we are free. Free in Love. Free from our perceived sickness.

The Course shares: “When the ego tempts you to sickness do not ask the Holy Spirit to heal the body, for this would merely be to accept the ego’s belief that the body is the proper aim of healing. Ask, rather, that the Holy Spirit teach you the right perception of the body, for perception alone can be distorted. Only perception can be sick, because only perception can be wrong.” (T-8.IX.1:5-7)

In the 909:Wellness Through Mind Healing course I was struck by this. I am comforted by Course’s message of “remembering my true nature.” I am called to remember that I am only Love. I am healed and I am well when I remember my true identity. I am not separate from God or my brothers.

In Lesson 199: I am not a body. I am free, it states that, “Freedom must be impossible as long as you perceive a body as yourself.” (W-199.1:1)

Here in this place, this earth is filled with plenty of bodies, bodies used for many things. In the past I judged, attacked, felt victimized in and about my body and the bodies of others. Being so invested in the body kept me separated from everyone and I did not feel happy or at peace. Because I had spent so much ego time with my body and the body of others, when you lose function of your body or a loved one, this loss can feel so great. I recall thinking, “How will I ever recover from this loss?” My dad’s death felt so final — a true ending. I carried this with me for many years.

It’s funny now that I have been studying ACIM for the past seven years, I no longer fear death, death of the body. I’ve come to understand what the body is for, but more importantly, what the mind is for.

A Course in Miracles is for mind healing. Wellness lies in awakening the mind to remembering we are already well. We were never sick.

We are asked in this course 909:Wellness Through Mind Healing, “Do I want to see everyone as the Father sees them? Do I want to see guilt or do I want to see the face of Christ?”

After listening to the Wellness Prayer, I wrote that my deepest truth is that I know all healing is possible, I need only join with God/Holy Spirit/Jesus. I can heal my mind of separation thoughts and thoughts of fear and death.

And to this there are no ‘dead ends’, only wellness.

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