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April-June, 2015

Forgiving Words

by Rev. Barbara Goodman Siegel, O.M.C.

Forgiving is a word that many of our egos grab hold of and analyze. First, our ego questions whether forgiveness for the act we judged as “wrong” is even deserved.  If our egoic self does allow it to be “granted”, it then (perhaps subconsciously) interprets it as something we are graciously giving to someone else even though the act they (supposedly) did is not really worthy of our forgiveness.  And, deep within, if we are honest, we know we have not truly forgiven the person for that act we judged as “wrong.”  We know this because when we think of that person, the same act comes into our consciousness and we are not at peace.

What if we took all the ego’s ammunition out of the word “Forgiveness” by redefining it?  I recently took a course from a teacher who said there are 96 words for “Love” in Sanskrit. A Course in Miracles says: “Perfect Love is the Atonement.” (T-2.VI.7:8)  So coming up with 96 words for “Forgiveness” could be thought of as coming up with 96 English words for Love. 

Looking at the word “Forgive”, we see two words: for/give. So, rather than trying to intellectually push through traditional forgiveness in a situation where we just are not ready to see our brother’s innocence, what if we look at what we can learn from the situation. Why were we presented with it? What is there in the situation that we can give that will heal our self, the (alleged) attacker and ultimately, the world? With that in mind, below is the beginning of my list of 96 for/giving words: 

I am for/giving love… I am for/giving compassion… I am for/giving blessing… I am for/giving truth… I am for/giving healing… I am for/giving beauty…

I am for/giving understanding… I am for/giving strength… I am for/giving listening… I am for/giving encouragement I am for/giving energy… I am forgiving non-judgment…

I am for/giving joy… I am for/giving nourishment… I am for/giving freedom… I am for/giving allowing…  I am for/giving faith… I am for/giving trust…

I am for/giving peace… I am for/giving prayer… I am for/giving light… I am for/giving support…  I am for/giving presence…  I am for/giving wholeness…

Perhaps you were in a situation many years ago where an act occurred that you have not been able to forgive, or perhaps something happened just this morning. It really doesn’t matter as time is irrelevant.  Perhaps you are no longer in contact with the person who (you believe) committed the act. Indeed they may not even still be on this earth. This also is irrelevant.

I suggest that you take the words above (plus the ones I hope you have added) and ask your Higher Self to show you the words that you can send to that person now. See the person in your mind’s eye and send them all the for/giving words that apply. Make sure they are words you can offer in peace. You are offering them for the healing of your wound.

You might even say their name such as: “Mary, I am for/giving you freedom, I am for/giving you wholeness, I am for/giving you healing…” In the beginning, your ego may give you some push back, but don’t listen. Continue to do this every day until when you think of that person what automatically comes to your mind are your for/giving words. A Course in Miracles says: “Forgiveness is the great release from time. It is the key to learning that the past is over. Madness speaks no more.There is no other teacher and no other way. For what has been undone no longer is.” (T-26.V.6:1-5)

Please join with me to come up with 96 words for “for/giving.” If you would be willing to e-mail me, I would love to see what you add to the list. For now, I am for/giving you love and blessings.

© 2015, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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