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Sept.-Dec., 2024

My New Life

by Rev. Dan Strodl, Ordained Ministerial Counselor

My life before A Course in Miracles was so different from how it is now. My days were filled with stress, worry, fear and grievances. I had judgments for many people in my life: work colleagues, neighbors, people in shops, friends. By judging them I’d feel better about myself. I was driven by the need to be successful, intelligent and respected. But underneath these desires I felt not good enough. I wanted people to like me, but I didn’t like myself.

All the things in the world that were supposed to make me happy — money, success, a fancy car, foreign holidays —weren’t working. Happiness would last a little while and then I was down again.

I finally realized that something was missing, and I went on a spiritual search. I tried different spiritual practices, and when I reached A Course in Miracles, I knew this was the one. I immersed myself in the Course, did a lesson every day, went to study groups, read the text, went to workshops, and read Course related books.

I started noticing where my mind was, and it was often in fear, grievances and judgments. I learned to hand these things over to the Holy Spirit and they would be healed. The darkness would lift and the Light would come through. Slowly my mind became more peaceful and happy. A love that I never knew before grew and extended out to my brothers. Separation weakened and I felt a unity with people in my life that I never felt before.

Forgiveness (letting go of worldly stories) has been a wonderful way to free myself from the ego mind. I now look at the stories in the world and remember they are not real, just a way to keep me stuck in the dream. I feel such freedom to be detached from the world’s opinions, beliefs and judgments. And the Holy Spirit is always with me to lead me back to my Right Mind.

It was a slow process, and I began to experience miracles every day; fear would weaken and be replaced by Love. I lost interest in external things — money, success, needing appreciation — and my true Self grew.

I’ve trained my mind to see past the judgments of my brothers and see the Light in them. Last week I had a situation where a friend emailed me a video of a man filling his mouth with vodka, and then spitting it out, and setting it on fire. The fire went backwards into the man’s mouth and set him on fire. I was so shocked and felt upset that my friend would send me such a violent video, and I judged him harshly. Then I remembered to see the Light in him and release my judgments. It came to me that this was his way of connecting, and he had the best intentions. I was able to let my judgment of him go and see the Light in him.

As I progress in the Course and let go of the worldly values, I don’t take the world seriously. I now find myself laughing a lot of the time. The world is a funny place and I share silliness with everyone, and they play with me. This simple practice lifts us up out of the ego’s clutches to the Light in all of us.

Today my life doesn’t resemble the life I had in the past. Happiness and peace are my natural state… fear, judgments and grievances are rare. And when I am triggered, I know what to do. I hand it over to Holy Spirit and He heals my mind of more guilt.

I feel so blessed to have the Holy Spirit always with me, guiding me along the path I never could have found on my own.

© 2024, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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