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January-March, 2011

Now One with Source

by Rev. Petra Sundheim

“Now are we one with Him Who is our Source.” ACIM Lesson 164

Amazing how Spirit works. I have not heard from my youngest daughter for some time and have been unable to reach her. Mystified, I went to sleep asking for Peace.

I had a dream of climbing a slippery wide ladder with my youngest daughter, as a little girl, climbing along side of me to a ‘loft of safety.’ We were near the top and others who had made it were encouraging us. I was tired and having trouble hanging on and couldn’t help my struggling little girl and I asked those above to help her. They reached down and pulled her to safety as I made it over the ledge. I asked for her and went into the room they pointed to. I heard sobs coming from a form rolled up in a blanket and took her into my arms, holding and comforting her as I woke up.

I asked for the meaning of the dream. The slippery aspect of the ladder was my self-doubt. “Why my youngest child?” I asked. “Did I wound her?” “Yes” was the answer. She was six and my attention and focus was on my two oldest acting-out adolescents. She was a trouble-free independent little girl who, at times, tried to comfort me and never shared her feelings. Deep remorse and tears flowed as I recalled this time in my life and my neglect of this precious child. Now this unhealed memory was coming up for her and she is acting accordingly.

I wrote a letter of confession and request for forgiveness for behaviors reflecting my own unhealed childhood and effects of Christian fundamentalism, a fear-based distortion of Jesus message. The Christ presence within, her true Self, Source could help her parent and heal this wounded inner child. I shared the love I feel for her and my availability when she is ready.

Opening A Course in Miracles to Lesson 164, I felt a holy instant had transpired in the present moment — the Now. Oneness was felt as I heard the Father’s call and allowed the Christ in me to answer. Indeed, grief was laid by. Now is Christ’s power in your mind, to heal as you were healed. Then, your doubts are meaningless for God is certain. His sureness lies beyond our every doubt. His Love remains beyond our every fear… Beyond all dreams.

Every word in this lesson came to life, as I had lived it.

© 2011, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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