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October-December, 2004

Surrounded by Love

by Rev. Deb Frantz, O.M.C.

As I write this, I am working on Workbook Lesson 264: “I am surrounded by the love of God.” What does this mean to be surrounded? For me, as it is still early in the morning, I think of warm, snuggly covers and the feeling it inspires. It is a feeling of warmth, a feeling of security, a feeling that I am comfortable where I am in the moment. That is the same with the Love of God.

I made the transition to complete devotion to Spirit’s work awhile ago. And in doing so, that commitment led me to becoming a resident staff person at Pathways of Light. Upon arriving, the peace and quiet sunk in. No more were the sounds of the city filling my ears. I look up at night and see millions of brilliant stars not hid by the lights of city living. I fall asleep to the soothing sounds of crickets in the night, gently rocking me to my night’s slumber.

After a few days, the ego thoughts that I was not worthy and deserving of such love and peace surfaced. As the fearful thoughts begin their tirade, I felt saddened. Opening into peace became difficult. Quieting my mind became challenging. Fear followed me, since it is in my mind. It does not matter what the outside surroundings look like or how peaceful they seem. What I experience comes from inside me. Experiences from the past came to mind in various forms. I was reminded of the life I had previously in which I was constantly trying to prove my worth. I do not believe that I was aware that I was doing just that, but through my continued awakening it became clear. I struggled for many years with depression. Depression over my life circumstances and all that has occurred in my life.

Through the awakening process, I came to realize that I was responsible for the seed of fear and doubt within my mind that created my outside soap operas. When a dear friend shared about feeling like a square peg being forced into a round hole and making a major change, I had an “a-ha!” moment as I had realized that for so very long, I had been feeling the same thing.

I had tried to become what I thought the world wanted me to become, but my goals were always just out of reach. I experienced little victories and then huge disappointments.

The real world, the world of God, lets us know that happiness is already our birthright and is deep within us, past all the veils of loneliness, fear and suffering. This gem of Light from the Father is His Love that He shares with us. It radiates through us and each ray is a ray of love, peace, compassion, joy, trust, happiness and more. It is truly what we are.

For so long, I had focused on what the world desired me to be. For so long, I focused on the judgment that came along with my participation in the world. For so long, I was unhappy in that knowing.

I am here today with a new knowledge, a knowledge of what my Father offers me. He offers me the truth. When I realize that truth within, I can then forgive the illusion of this world. What I believe within me, even down to the lowest level, I will see reflected in this world. If I choose the Father’s Love and the truth of who I am and who my brothers are, then I will look upon a world forgiven.

In going back to the idea of surrounding myself with His Love, I see how I have chosen to not be at peace with it. For me at one time, the very idea of being surrounded could seem more like being suffocated. In a dysfunctional setting, as the ego and this world represents, it seems possible that I could be choked. The ego only desires torture and death. If I surrender myself to God’s Love, then to the ego that means that I am making a huge sacrifice of my control and my will. In the setting of Heaven, where only Love abides, I am simply being One with God. And God’s Will is my will.

It is a glorious uplifting of my spirit to know that I can choose again. The decisions I have made in the past have been unloving to my brothers and to myself. Now I make the only choice that I can now make, a choice made with love. In choosing love, I choose Life in God.

The past does not have to grip my mind with fear. I do not have to worry about what could have been had I traveled this path, or not made that decision to do thus. I can release my mind from this fear by remaining in the present, accepting the peace of God and enjoying the quiet contentment that comes from resting in Him.

God is the only choice that I can make now. His Love envelops me and lifts me higher than before. Healing continues and for that I am grateful.

As I closed this article and put it aside to review before submission, I was met with more obstacles to my peace that became yet another “lesson to learn and a blessing to earn” as a dear friend of mine would say. I was blessed to have the support of the staff here at Pathways of Light to assist me with bringing the darkness to the Light.

In the vision that I was receiving during the counseling, I was first surrounded by beautiful angels that sent unimaginable amounts of Love to me. The warmth was so comforting. They reached out their hands as if to tell me that I was safe and secure and that they were with me always. I began to feel that our energies were blending, and I saw the beings and myself now as One in radiant white Light. The sounds of ancient melodies and harmonies calmed my aching heart. I received a further vision of a lighthouse. The lighthouse stood as a pillar, its strength undeniable. No matter what the weather or what storms may come and go, my strength stands tall in God. As I realize my strength in Him, I am realizing the Love. This Love that I extend is like the light from a lighthouse shining far and wide, providing safe harbor to all within reach. With this vision, I accepted great healing within my mind. I accepted my function and my purpose to forgive and to extend the Love. By my doing so, I remember we are all truly surrounded by the Love of God.

© 2004, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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