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Gentle Healing Journal Day 32 10-22-18

Journal for Day 32
LESSON 32
I have invented the world I see.

“I have invented this situation as I see it.”

If my mind should stray to the ego thought that I am a victim, I remind myself of the truth that I have invented this situation as I see it. I am the scriptwriter of my story. I have an appointment at a hospital in Houston next week. They will be running some tests and then the next day I will see the doctor to talk about surgery.

If all of this were taking place here in the area where I live, it would be no big deal to me. But driving to and in Houston, the expense of staying at a hotel for at least two nights, maneuvering through this huge hospital, well, I find I am dreading all of this. I could see myself as a victim but then I remember that I have invented this situation as I see it.

I, as part of the Sonship, made this world, and I decided to participate in it. I come to a particular incarnation with a specific purpose that will help me to awaken and thus help the Sonship to awaken. So regardless of whether the story seems to be interesting or happy or painful, whether I seem to be following my heart or letting the ego make my decisions, I am accomplishing my purpose.

Within the story, which at this time includes this trip to the hospital, I have another decision to make. How will I choose to perceive this situation? Will I decide that I hate the whole idea and that I am a victim? If that is the case, I will learn from it but it will be pretty uncomfortable for me.

Or will I accept this part of the story with the same enthusiasm I accept other parts that are more to my liking? In that case I will still learn from it, but I will do so without suffering, and I will learn more quickly the lesson it contains because I will not be conflicted in my purpose. Either way, it is my choice and no one is making me feel what I feel.

The only thing that could make it feel like a victim is my decision to feel like that. I’m glad that I no longer see value in being a victim so that I don’t hold onto those feelings anymore. The moment I decided that this is going to be interesting and maybe fun, any feeling of victimhood just fell away. See, I invent the situation as I experience it by how I choose to see it and it is just that easy.

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