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Study of Text, C 14: IV. Your Function in the Atonement, P 5. 3-31-17

IV. Your Function in the Atonement, P 5
5 Before you make any decisions for yourself, remember that you have decided against your function in Heaven, and then consider carefully whether you want to make decisions here. Your function here is only to decide against deciding what you want, in recognition that you do not know. How, then, can you decide what you should do? Leave all decisions to the One Who speaks for God, and for your function as He knows it. So will He teach you to remove the awful burden you have laid upon yourself by loving not the Son of God, and trying to teach him guilt instead of love. Give up this frantic and insane attempt that cheats you of the joy of living with your God and Father, and of waking gladly to His Love and Holiness that join together as the truth in you, making you one with Him.

Journal
Because we chose an experience of separation our tendency is going to be to move toward fear and guilt. This is because they are the natural outcomes of separation. Therefore, if we want to return our minds to love then we need to stop making decisions from a place of fear and guilt. This would seem to be circular thinking since we are in fear and guilt so how do we stop making decisions that keep us in fear and guilt?

Our salvation from this closed cycle of thinking is the Holy Spirit, which was placed in our mind for that purpose. The Holy Spirit is the Love in our mind from which we can make decisions that take us out of fear and guilt. It seems that first, we must become aware of what is happening and why we keep falling back into fear and guilt and then learn that there is another option. A Course in Miracles is an excellent way to learn this. It does a thorough job of highlighting the ego for us and also it presents the way out of the ego.

Once we get to that place on our path Home, we then must overcome the belief that no longer making these decisions on our own is a loss. We have treasured this ability to make decisions and tend not to want to relinquish this right. This something else the Course helps us with. We learn that we make no decisions on my own anyway, that we are always making them either with the ego or the Holy Spirit. With practice, we discover that the decisions made with ego are often unfortunate and that the decisions made with Holy Spirit lead us to joy and peace. From there we must form a new habit of consistently asking the Holy Spirit to decide for us.

From choosing the Holy Spirit as my decision maker, I have seen that I make terrible decisions without Him. I often choose to act from fear and guilt and then the situation in question just deteriorates from there. Recently while trying to be helpful to someone I love, I made things worse for both me and for him. I did this because I was trying to be helpful in my own way. I was in fear and guilt so fear and guilt were all I had to offer. At the time my thoughts seemed to make sense to me, and even to be obviously right. I was wrong… again.

But I saw my error and instead of keeping the feeling of being guilty, and instead of trying to get rid of it by projecting onto the other person, I asked the Holy Spirit to decide for me how I feel, and what I should do. This is always, without exception, the choice that will work. It is the choice that will bring me happiness and peace and will bring me back to God. I truly don’t know what I want or what will make me happy, but the Holy Spirit does know this, so why not let Him decide for me?

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