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A LETTER TO MY FRIEND

A LETTER TO MY FRIEND

Dear Mary,

Sometimes when we are in the middle of something big, all we see are the details that are right in front of us. We can miss the big picture. For that, we need to move back, get some distance. This is very true of our lives. What is going on right now holds our complete attention. We are unable to see our whole story and how one thing led to the next and how each thing fits like a puzzle piece into the whole. I have written an imaginary story of Mary talking to Jesus at the close of her life.

“Well Mary, you said you could do it; that it wasn’t going to be too much for you. And I’ll tell you the truth, when you came to me with your intentions, some were concerned that you had bitten off more than you could chew, that you had chosen too many hard lessons for one life time. But you felt confident that you could do this and you were determined to get as much out of this life as you could.”

“Some of the others said that choosing to come as Black in this period of history wasn’t as hard as it used to be, but it was going to offer plenty of forgiveness lessons, and coming as a black woman would certainly keep you busy. But then you said you would be gay as well, and that really blew everyones mind! Too much they said, just too much. But you didn’t stop there. When they saw the family environment you chose to learn from, there was a lot of head shaking going on. But you and I agreed, Mary, that you could do this, and that no matter how you handled it, there would be so many lessons learned that it was worth it.”

“But look what you have done with that life. I could not be more proud of your work. Each thing that came at you, you used to grow and become stronger. I know how hard it seemed to you working the dense atmosphere of illusion and I know how painful it all felt. I saw that sometimes you despaired of coming through it, and often you felt like you were failing. But it was all just perfect. I kept whispering that in your ear, so you would never entirely forget. I placed angels all around you to strengthen and uphold you in even the hardest of the forgiveness lessons. From here where we were watching and supporting your every effort, there was nearly a constant chorus of ‘oohs and ahhs’ and ‘you go, girls’. No matter what the reservations were before you started, you had a regular fan club before it was over.”

“Do you see now, how perfectly orchestrated it was, Mary? You met exactly the right people at the right time. Some of them seemed unkind and even cruel, but those were the greatest of the forgiveness opportunities, and we are all in awe of how you overcame your pain to use these opportunities. Now it seems silly, doesn’t it, to be concerned at the seeming failures? You got from each encounter, exactly what you needed. There was never any danger you would fail, each person and situation was a chance to practice a process of forgiveness. There was no right or wrong, no success or failure. It was just practice time. Each time you came away with a puzzle piece in place. Hard to see that when you are in the illusion isn’t it?”

“You had hoped that you would make such progress that in the end, you would be able to share what you had learned in a more direct way, that you would be able to hear me more clearly and pass that on to others. Ah Mary, there was never any doubt. And you walked bravely through your fear into the place that allowed this to happen. When you were feeling overwhelmed by the process, did you think of Moses? I did. I thought about how he tried so hard to get out of his destiny. He thought that because he stuttered that would get him out of speaking for God.(Hah!) There was no getting out of it because beneath his fear was his comitment to the process, and the same was true for you, too.”

“So now, Mary, I, and all of us here, just want to say thank you. Thank you so much for doing your forgiveness lessons. Thank you so much for lifting yourself up, and for lifting up everyone else. We stand in awe of your accomplishments, and we thank you.”

That’s your story, Mary. I’m just passing it on to you.

Love, Myron

© 2005, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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My Story

My Story

Don?t you love running into someone else who is studying A Course in Miracles? I think that just the fact I found the Course is a wonderful miracle, so I am always interested in everyone?s story. I was attending a Unity center in Lake Charles, La. when I heard that Marge Cass, minister for The Church of the Open Road, was going to a neighboring town to try to get a Course group started. A group from our center planned to be there in support of her effort. I didn?t have an interest in A Course in Miracles, but I did like Marge very much so I wanted to be there. Since I was between jobs, I had plenty of free time.

I can?t tell you what Marge said that grabbed my attention so completely, but when I left there that night I knew I had to have that book. I didn?t know exactly how I would get it, because being unemployed also meant being broke, but I never questioned my decision. Once I got the Course, I started attending a discussion group at the Unity center. Back then, I guess this was around 1982, not many people had even heard of A Course in Miracles, at least not in Lake Charles.

Occasionally as I was reading and studying, I would feel just overwhelmed with my good luck at having found this extraordinary book, and then sometimes I would wonder why on earth I even believed it; it was such a different take on spirituality. But, I knew on a deeper level that this was exactly what I was supposed to be doing.

I was married to a man working construction and we moved around a lot for awhile, so I went long periods at a time with no contact with other Course students. I was pretty isolated in my study and I was also pretty erratic in it. I thought that in the periods when I wasn?t doing the lessons or reading the book that I was not doing anything. However, when I look back on it, I was always learning and growing. When I wasn?t consciously choosing to do it with the Holy Spirit?s help, I was making the job harder and more painful, but I was still growing spiritually.

In these years I raised my children and played out the script of my life. When my last child was getting ready to go away to school, I realized that I was about to experience a big hole in my life. What would I do without motherhood to fulfill me? I knew I had to have something important to take its place. I had been working with the Course sporadically all these years, so I decided it was time to get serious about it.

At the same time I got my first computer. I had heard about the internet, of course, and decided to see what it was all about. I was trying to decide what to look for when I went on line, and decided to see if there was anything about A Course in Miracles. (I told you I was isolated in my study!) Boy, was there ever stuff about the Course! I started checking out some of the forums because I found I was hungry for contact with other people who were of like mind. I tried some different forums, but when I found Pathways of Light, I knew I had found my home.

I soon discovered that they had a structured study program based on Course principles and I started taking them. I knew that I was serious now and I wanted something that would help me develop self discipline as well as deepen my understanding of the Course, and this study program was perfect for what I needed. I had only taken one of the courses when I knew that I would complete their ministerial program. I felt elated at the thought because I knew that this was what I was supposed to do, but I also felt frightened at the thought because it seemed impossibly arrogant of me to think I could be a minister of God. After all, I didn?t have all that good a track record in the past. I had the Course for years and I didn?t think I had made all that much progress. I think the only reason I was able to overcome my own fear was that it took me so long to complete the courses that I was able to lose sight of the fact that someday I would finish them.

Well, I did complete the courses and now I am an ordained minister with Pathways of Light. Now the Course is not something I do. It is what I am. My path to God is no longer a satisfying way to fill my empty nest; it is the purpose of my life. I keep my eyes firmly fixed on that purpose by continuing my spiritual education through Pathways and by studying the Course daily. I give a sermon at a local church every three weeks, have a study group in my home, and facilitate other ministerial students. What a wonderful life I have now!

This is my story. I would love to hear yours.

© 2005, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
You may freely share copies of this with your friends, provided this notice is included.

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