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October - December, 2009

A Lesson in Love

Joanne Kraenzie Schneider

My husband and I have had a couple we went out with regularly for several years. We considered them our best friends. We had lots of commonalities including working out regularly and competing in athletic events, kids hitting college, mutual friends, and our spirituality. Over the years we had several discussions about our spirituality. I enjoyed these conversations.

Several months ago, when we found and shared A Course In Miracles with our friends, they simply “could not go there.” They said just that. Over the next few months, after several invitations to our Course group, it finally sunk in that they really were not interested.

As I worked on my spiritual life, in particular my grievances, I found that I was holding a grievance against our friends. I was angry. I could not even go out with them without experiencing feelings of resentment. As I did more grievance work, I repeatedly focused on our friends.

Then one day I had an insight. I considered our friends to be a “special relationship.” This was the basis for my grievances. Jesus says, “…all special relationships have elements of fear in them. This is why they shift and change so frequently.” T-15.V.4.1-2

My relationship with them changed and it was a change based on fear. I used this special relationship to support my ego. Thank God the Holy Spirit uses special relationships “…as learning experiences that point to truth.” T-15.V.4.5 My grievances taught me a huge lesson about special relationships. This insight left me with such relief. I loved our friends no less, but I could now see them as Love, the changeless kind.

This experience also taught me something else. Lessons may be where I least expect them. Maybe that is what Jesus meant when he said, “Under His teaching, every relationship becomes a lesson in love.” T-15.V.4.6

© 2009, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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