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Defensiveness Is an Attack On Myself

Rev. Joan Haber

I utilize defensiveness when I want to be “right” rather than happy.

Defensive behavior is unnerving and unpleasant to be around. When I see it in others I can identify it quite easily and understand that the defensive person is just in a temporary state of fear and is lashing out.

When I engage in defensiveness I am able to see that I am making a choice to be defensive. It seems to be a security blanket for me at times. It is a way to keep threatening people at arms length.

As A Course in Miracles says in the introduction: “Nothing real can be threatened. Nothing unreal exists.” So, when I am feeling threatened, I am protecting something that is not real. That something is my sense of control of situations, my stability in this unstable world. Of course, this defensive behavior cannot protect me from any perceived threat. It only serves to keep me separate, alone, hostile and fearful. I am actually the one who is threatening others with my defensiveness. I am guarding my fears like a ferocious cornered animal.

I can feel what defensiveness does in my body. It causes all sorts of dis-ease within me. I have chosen to be “right” and now must defend it to the death!
Then a miracle occurs. I ask God to help me choose again and this time I choose happiness. I drop my defenses and trust that I will be OK. I will be more than OK, I will be walking in the Light of God, serene in the knowledge that I am safe and whole. I choose defenselessness and the freedom that comes with that choice is liberating. No one is threatening me anymore, people are responding to my light and I express unconditional love towards myself and others, with no effort whatsoever. What is this miracle? How can all this turn around in a split second? Miracle principle #34 explains this for me: “Miracles restore the mind to its fullness. By atoning for lack they establish perfect protection. The spirit’s strength leaves no room for intrusions.” I am just in awe of this process and I am grateful for the miracles that I receive in spite of my ego’s best efforts to block their awareness.

Rev. Joan Haber is a Pathways of Light minister living in Sarasota, Florida.

© 2006, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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Leadership from Within

by Rev. Marie Hanson

Most people are happy. Not all the time though.  Ever wonder why that is? What creates this shift from happy to sad, from peaceful to angry? What I will share with you is not the latest leadership fad. It is much deeper and lasting. If you don’t like what you see in your life and world around you, the leader within you is your point of power to change. You can access the leader within.

Gentle understanding of your thoughts, words and actions represent your relationship within. They show the world what you accept to be true. Taking time to notice your thoughts can have revealing results. Be curious about your reactions to people, places and events of the world.  Notice what are you thinking, and then feeling. Observe if it is congruent with your intention and values. Resist any urge to judge your thoughts as good/bad or better than/less than. Be kind and compassionate with yourself. 

Try to catch yourself in the act of thinking.  Question if the thought is true or if it is just nonsense. Accept only what reflects your intention and values. Releasing the nonsense, or clearing the cobwebs, frees you up to think greater. What is it you want more of in your life? Perhaps love, time, work you enjoy or peace. Now, notice what you think and talk about. Are you sharing what you want, or what you don’t have?
I had a client that just really disliked her job. She was stressed, angry and stuck. When we examined the thoughts behind her feelings, we discovered a lot of things she liked about her work. Once she was able to focus on what she liked, she attracted more enjoyment into her work. It spilled into other areas of her life as well.

Her thoughts didn’t change. Her perception of them did. She allowed the Leader from Within to come forth and show her a better way. She measured the thoughts against her intention and values, discarding what didn’t serve her and attending to what did. I witnessed her process over time as she went from a whiney, argumentative person to a joyful and inspiring example.

Your life is an example to others, too. People you know, and complete strangers, are influenced by you. Just as you learned by example from others in your life, the opposite is true, too. Are you teaching others what works for you, or what doesn’t? Listen to what you say to others. What is the story you are telling? Happy or sad?

Question your source of inspiration and values. Know that they are still true for you. If not, let them go. Begin to attract to yourself the vision that brings you greater peace. Get to know yourself better, and lead with your example first. Reclaim your thoughts, which will realign your feelings and create the life you deserve. Reveal your Leader from Within. Healing your heart and mind, holding your highest vision for yourself, will bring about a greater peace than you could ever imagine.

Marie Hanson retired after 26 years in the Navy and now serves as a Pathways of Light Ordained Ministerial Counselor in Carson City, Nevada.

© 2006, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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Day Dream

by Rev. Veronika Wilcox

A difficult dream awoke me last night. I decided to put my favorite CD from Pathways of Light (course 914) on repeat. I then went back to sleep. When ever I awoke a little, I could hear some sentence of loving truth from the CD.

Gradually my dreams started to change. There was more love and understanding of others as well as more gentleness in them. Then it came to me that if I did this same procedure during the day — that is, always think loving truth — my day dream (life experience) would change naturally from difficulties to loving joy and peace.

The Spider

I saw a big, huge spider just peeping out from under the curtain in the living room. My first thought was that my husband wasn’t here to catch it. Then I wondered if my little container with which I normally catch insects would be big enough. And only then did I look a little closer and discovered that it was only a bit of knitting wool!

This reminded me of the exercise in A Course in Miracles where it says that I give all the meaning there is to an object. Well, what a lesson! What else do I give meaning to which frightens me?

A Testimony

All disease is the result of education, and disease can carry its ill-effects no further than mortal mind maps out the way. (Page 176:25-27 from Science & Health)

A violin student of mine had just finished having her lesson when she mentioned a sore throat. I spoke to her very firmly, saying that she need not have this thought in her mind as thought creates experience. Then I quoted the above and told her how this had once helped me to completely ward off some symptoms of flu.

She listened very attentively and then left, determined not to let any thought like this to govern her experience.

Then I forgot all about it. When I saw her a week later she came in beaming with health and happiness. She had a good lesson and only next day did I remember the whole incident. Yes, Truth does heal!

Rev. Veronika Birken is a Pathways of Light minister living in Wolumla, NSW, Australia.

© 2006, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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Sonnet from a Dreamer

by Sara Neil Hayden

Disarm me, Father,
And dampen the fearful fire
Of my mistrust —
That fire in the belly
Which seems to consume my body.

Can it be that there are holes
In Creation wherein your Love
Exists not; does not nurture;
Does not shower blessings?

Speak to me, Father, of Who I am,
And Who You are,
So that I will know
Reality can only bless.
Thank you.

Sara Nell Hayden from SingingBird Press http://www.journeytothecenter.net

© 2006, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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