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Study of Text, C 13: VIII. From Perception to Knowledge, P 2. 10-28-16

VIII. From Perception to Knowledge, P 2

2 The very real difference between perception and knowledge becomes quite apparent if you consider this: There is nothing partial about knowledge. Every aspect is whole, and therefore no aspect is separate. You are an aspect of knowledge, being in the Mind of God, Who knows you. All knowledge must be yours, for in you is all knowledge. Perception, at its loftiest, is never complete. Even the perception of the Holy Spirit, as perfect as perception can be, is without meaning in Heaven. Perception can reach everywhere under His guidance, for the vision of Christ beholds everything in light. Yet no perception, however holy, will last forever.

Journal
Here is what I know . . . ok, that was a short list. I don’t know even in the most basic things. I can say that I am here, but then I have to ask, who am I who is here? Where is here? Jesus just told us in the last paragraph that there is no where or when. How about this: I love God and He loves me. At least that is true. But what does it mean? I don’t even know what love is. I know the feelings I have for certain people, but love is universal or it is not love. So clearly, what I feel is not love as love truly exists.

All I have to go on is perception, that is, how I choose to see things. If I allow it, the Holy Spirit will fulfill Its function and correct my perception. Even then, it is still perception and not knowledge. Trying to understand this I thought about how the Holy Spirit has helped me. I have made myself miserable simply by dragging the past around with me. This unfortunate tendency keeps me locked into thinking that is often painful.

So the Holy Spirit has helped me to understand that the past does not exist so there is no reason to feel guilty for it, or to find someone else guilty. He helped me to imagine time rolling up like a carpet behind me, so I look back and there is nothing to see. Where is the reason for guilt now? But if we actually exist in eternity, then there is no timeline at all, so no carpet to roll up. There is nothing happening before or after.

And not only is time an illusion, there is also no one outside my mind to find guilty in the first place, and as the Son of God, how could I be guilty for anything myself? And even this is just a clearer way to see; it is not truth. I accept the limits of perception, but I know that truth or not, there is a way to see that will bring me peace even in this dream state. This is worth pursuing.

I can just forget about knowing anything. That is not going to happen. What I can do is accept correction for my misperceived thoughts. I can bring my thoughts into alignment with something close to truth, if I will allow the Holy Spirit to do that for me. Right now my life is pretty insane. It always has been, but in the past I just didn’t know how insane it was.

Here is an example. This morning I discovered that someone did something for me that was very loving and kind. I felt that love wash over me and it brought tears of happiness to my eyes. Then, in almost the same breath, I remembered that something was occurring with a loved one that I perceive as bad, and the fear covered over the love and I felt discouraged and the tears were sad tears.

I know what happened. I understand that both the loving feeling and the frightened feeling are the result of perception, and perception isn’t the truth. The loving feeling was closer to truth. It more closely reflects what I am as the Son of God, so while it is not truth, it is a true perception. I see the Holy Spirit’s work in this perception. The frightening feeling is further from the truth. It reflects a thought that is based on an illusion.
How could the Son of God have anything to fear? In order to be afraid I would have to believe something that is false. I see the ego’s thinking in this perception.

It is easy now to discern the source of my perceptions. If my thoughts produce happy, peaceful and loving effects, they reflect true perception. If they produce angry, fearful, guilty effects, they reflect untrue perception. Knowing this, I can ask for correction of my thoughts when I see they are clearly false. I must ask for help because I can’t undo them alone, since I did not make them alone.

In the Rules for Decision in Chapter 30, Jesus tells us that all decisions, in order to have power, must be made in union. We either make them with the ego or with Holy Spirit. So if I made a decision to believe something that causes me to suffer then in order to correct that effect, I must make a new decision this time with Holy Spirit. So instead of joining with ego, I join with the Holy Spirit. My part is to desire change, and His part is to facilitate that change. In union He and I change the perception that was false and my thinking once again reflects love and I am happy. And very grateful.

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Study of Text, C 13: VIII. VIII. From Perception to Knowledge, P 1. 10-27-16

VIII. From Perception to Knowledge, P 1

1 All healing is release from the past. That is why the Holy Spirit is the only Healer. He teaches that the past does not exist, a fact which belongs to the sphere of knowledge, and which therefore no one in the world can know. It would indeed be impossible to be in the world with this knowledge. For the mind that knows this unequivocally knows also it dwells in eternity, and utilizes no perception at all. It therefore does not consider where it is, because the concept “where” does not mean anything to it. It knows that it is everywhere, just as it has everything, and forever.

Journal
Jesus says that all healing is release from the past. In another place in the Course he says that all healing is essentially a release from fear. This tells me that a release from the past is a release from fear. So I asked how this could be. How is it that fear and the past are associated? The answer is in this paragraph.

Here is how this seems to me. Jesus tells us that the Holy Spirit teaches us that the past does not exist, and without the belief in the past, we know ourselves only in eternity. In eternity there is no perception because we have knowledge. In fact, if we have knowledge, we cannot exist in the world. So what is perception and how is it different than knowledge?

Perception is what we have instead of knowledge while we believe we exist outside eternity. Knowledge is certain and unchanging. Knowledge is true now and later and in every circumstance. In fact, knowledge undoes now and later and circumstances. Perception, on the other hand is only what we currently believe to be true. It might be true or it might not. It might be true at this moment, and different in another moment. Perception is an product of time, so it doesn’t exist outside of time.

Here is an example of perception. I had a text from my child that seemed very unkind and judgmental. I felt first angry, then sad. When we spoke in person, I realized she had been making a joke, something that was not obvious in a text. So for awhile I read the words and thought I knew what they meant. That was my perception. Then I spoke to her and the meaning of the words changed. That was my new perception of the same words.
Remembering this incident it is easy for me to see why it is that perception causes us to feel like the world is not stable, and why we feel insecure and therefore fearful.

If we had knowledge instead of perception all this would change. But here is something interesting that Jesus tells us in this paragraph. If we had knowledge we would not see ourselves as in this world. We would know that we dwell in eternity. Eternity is without a where and without a when. Without a when there would be no past.

What would there be to fear without a past? Every frightening or regretful thought I have ever had was based on something I did or heard or learned in the past. The ego thoughts that I bring to the Holy Spirit for healing would not exist if I did not keep them alive through memory, which is the present view of the past. So without a past there would be no need for healing. If there were nothing to be healed, there would be no fear.

The mind that knows it is in eternity knows that it is everywhere, just as it has everything, and forever. I repeated this promise here just because I like to remind myself of the goal and the reason I do the work and stay true to my purpose.

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Study of Text, C 13: VII. Attainment of the Real World, P 17. 10-25-16

VII. Attainment of the Real World, P 17

17 We cannot sing redemption’s hymn alone. My task is not completed until I have lifted every voice with mine. And yet it is not mine, for as it is my gift to you, so was it the Father’s gift to me, given me through His Spirit. The sound of it will banish sorrow from the mind of God’s most holy Son, where it cannot abide. Healing in time is needed, for joy cannot establish its eternal reign where sorrow dwells. You dwell not here, but in eternity. You travel but in dreams, while safe at home. Give thanks to every part of you that you have taught how to remember you. Thus does the Son of God give thanks unto his Father for his purity.

Journal
Ah, the dichotomy of it. I think I am here in time and space, being something I cannot be. Often I forget it can only be a dream and I believe in it. I believe I am Myron and I believe this is my life and where I exist. Even when I know this is not so, I still experience it as if it were the truth. The difference now is that I can accept that this is a dream and when I forget, I can shift back to remembering.

As I experience purification, the dream is a happier dream, but still a dream. The truth is I exist in eternity, in joy and purity. That means I am in eternity now, even as I dream of being in time. As I have allowed my mind to be healed of this fantasy, I have learned to love and appreciate Jesus for his dedication to our awakening. He says that his task is not complete until he lifts every voice with his. I want to join you in this, Jesus. I want to help you awaken everyone.

Right now, I help by accepting the Atonement for myself. I notice each sorrow I seem to experience and ask to see differently. They are far fewer than they used to be, but the ones that come up now are the beliefs I have held close, and so it seems hard sometimes. But this I know; I choose. I choose to keep the beliefs or I choose to let them go.

Dear Brother, I dedicate myself, as have you, to the Awakening. I surrender the self, and I willingly accept guidance.
In the Manual for Teachers it says this about Jesus.

It is possible to read his words and benefit from them without accepting him into your life. Yet he would help you yet a little more if you will share your pains and joys with him, and leave them both to find the peace of God.

I love you Brother, and I gratefully accept you into my life. I gratefully share my pains and joys with you. And I most gratefully leave them both to find the peace of God.

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Study of Text, C 13: VII. Attainment of the Real World, P 16. 10-24-16

VII. Attainment of the Real World, P 16

16 In me you have already overcome every temptation that would hold you back. We walk together on the way to quietness that is the gift of God. Hold me dear, for what except your brothers can you need? We will restore to you the peace of mind that we must find together. The Holy Spirit will teach you to awaken unto us and to yourself. This is the only real need to be fulfilled in time. Salvation from the world lies only here. My peace I give you. Take it of me in glad exchange for all the world has offered but to take away. And we will spread it like a veil of light across the world’s sad face, in which we hide our brothers from the world, and it from them.

Journal
“In me you have already overcome every temptation that would hold you back.”
In the Course, Jesus has told us that we need do nothing. Again, here, he is telling us that it has all been done for us. He overcame temptation and when it was done by him, it was done for us. This is part of what it means to be One in the Mind of Christ. What is done by one is done for all. So what does this mean to me? How does this affect me?

I think what it means is that I can relax and take this journey in peace. I can notice the ego thoughts in my mind and know they are meaningless, and therefore I am guiltless. I can see them, and let them go the Holy Spirit. I don’t have to worry about what I find in the mind, nor do I have to struggle with it or change it. The only change required of me is that I change my mind about wanting to keep the ego deceptions. I change my mind, not out of fear or because they are evil, but because they hold me back and I am ready to return to God.

Jesus is my brother and all I need is the awareness that my brothers are all I need. As I accept that we are one, I accept my true nature and the nature of my Creator. In that instant of acceptance, I let go of the separate self, and the separate will that allowed the experience of this illusion. In that instant, I know that God’s Will is truly my will and the only will I have. Jesus is the first of us to complete the journey, and in his completion is ours.
Now all we need to do is to accept it as completed.

All the work that seems necessary is that we remove all that blocks our awareness. I allow the removal of these blocks daily as I choose peace rather than judgment, love rather than fear, innocence rather than guilt. I am just reminding myself of my true nature, and deciding for it as opposed to the made up self I chose long ago. Yes, Jesus has undone it, but I must accept it for myself. I do this as I have looked at the effect of separation and seen that I am no longer interested. What I want the Holy Spirit cannot undo, but my disinterest allows the mind to be healed.

I am awakening to Jesus and to those others who have gone before me. They are helping me to remember. Each time I look on a brother’s confusion and refuse to become confused myself, I am a step closer. Each time I am attacked and refuse to defend myself, I am a step closer. Each time I see evil and ugliness, unkindness and guilt and fear, and instead of reacting to it, I ask for another way to see, I am a step closer.

This is how we do it. No need to be afraid, no need to doubt. It is done for us, and as we accept what has been done, we join our brother Jesus in awakening the rest of the Sonship. I am resolute in my decision for union. I will see my brother as myself, and if I falter even for a moment, I will ask for help and Help will answer me.

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Study of Text, C 13: VII. Attainment of the Real World, P 15. 10-21-16

VII. Attainment of the Real World, P 15

15 Then follow Him in joy, with faith that He will lead you safely through all dangers to your peace of mind this world may set before you. Kneel not before the altars to sacrifice, and seek not what you will surely lose. Content yourself with what you will as surely keep, and be not restless, for you undertake a quiet journey to the peace of God, where He would have you be in quietness.

Journal
I appreciate that Jesus says to follow the Holy Spirit in joy. It is only recently that this has been my experience, and it is not always entirely true for me even now. I went about awakening as if it is the hardest thing I could ever do, and as if it needed my very serious concentration at all times. I often talk about vigilance being key, and I am not wrong about that. But here is how it is changing for me.

I am vigilant for the ego in my mind, and very willing for it to be undone. What I have discovered is that vigilance and willingness does not require serious concentration. I don’t have to exhaust myself doing this. I don’t have to grit my teeth and go about it as if failure were chasing me every step of the way. More and more, I understand and accept that failure is not possible, and God does not want or need my grim determination.

In fact, often lately, I have noticed ridiculous ego thoughts in my mind and laughed at the absurdity. I see that beliefs I thought had been released are still showing up and I just smile at the tenacity of ego mind. I think this means I am no longer afraid of myself. I will return my mind to God, because I already have. I am just awakening to that indisputable fact. I no longer feel a need to struggle. I am no longer frightened of failure.

While I do feel anxious sometimes, and while I do get frustrated with my own stubbornness, it doesn’t last and mostly I don’t have that old sense of urgency I had before. I am earnest in my desire for God, and I am determined to return Home, but the determination is not so somber, nor so severe. The work is more peaceful now, and when I try to let go of an ego belief and it feels obstinate, I still know that I am the Son of God and I cannot be denied. This helps me return to peace, as I remember that there is nothing to fear. I am only becoming aware of what has always been my reality. How could that not be possible?

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Study of Text, Chapter 13: VII. Attainment of the Real World, P 14. 10-18-16

VII. Attainment of the Real World, P 14

14 Whenever you are tempted to undertake a useless journey that would lead away from light, remember what you really want, and say:
The Holy Spirit leads me unto Christ, and where else would I go? What need have I but to awake in Him?

Journal
It is still easy for me to wander away from the light, but I find that I don’t like the darkness any longer. As soon as I notice what I have done, I change my mind. I don’t want to take any more useless journeys. I was doing some work that required me to explain something to a new employee. She had done it wrong and I was showing her how to correct it. She began to argue with me and tried to show me that I was the one who was wrong. I told her no. I told her this is the way it must be done, and then I walked away.

She does this kind of thing all the time, and I thought I was over letting it bother me, but I kept thinking how foolish it was for her to argue with me. I thought about telling my boss that this is the reason I don’t work with her. After a few minutes of this, I stopped and thought about it. I just don’t want to feel like this. I don’t want to judge anyone, because I have to give up peace in order to do so. I don’t want to teach myself or anyone else that there is more value in being right than there is in being in union.

I recognized I had taken a wrong turn and was on another useless journey that was not leading me unto Christ. At first, I kept being pulled back into my righteous indignation. I reminded myself that I chose to be in union with the Holy Spirit, and that I want an unbroken union with Him. I asked the Holy Spirit to purify my mind of any thoughts that are opposed to joining. As I allowed my mind to be healed and soothed by the Holy Spirit, the whole situation became absurd to me.

This woman is just trying to find peace, just like I am. When she feels wrong about something it upsets her and she doesn’t feel peaceful. So she thinks she has to be right about everything. Being right feels like salvation to her. I can certainly understand that. Wasn’t I just doing the same thing? I wanted to be right more than I wanted to walk in the light. Isn’t that the same as believing that being right is my salvation?

Thank you, Holy Spirit, for enlightening my mind.

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Study of Text, Chapter 13: VII. Attainment of the Real World, P 13. 10-17-16

VII. Attainment of the Real World, P 13

13 Leave, then, your needs to Him. He will supply them with no emphasis at all upon them. What comes to you of Him comes safely, for He will ensure it never can become a dark spot, hidden in your mind and kept to hurt you. Under His guidance you will travel light and journey lightly, for His sight is ever on the journey’s end, which is His goal. God’s Son is not a traveller through outer worlds. However holy his perception may become, no world outside himself holds his inheritance. Within himself he has no needs, for light needs nothing but to shine in peace, and from itself to let the rays extend in quiet to infinity.

Journal
Again I am reminded to leave my needs to the Holy Spirit. I can rest easy knowing that everything is taken care of if I do this. My retirement date is very close. Every so often I wonder if I am going to be financially ready for that. Sometimes I start planning what to do about this bill or that obligation. Then I start to worry.

Reviewing this section of the Course is so helpful right now. When I notice I am thinking ahead and fretting, I remind myself that the Holy Spirit is in charge of my needs in this world so why would I be concerned. This helps me to back out of something that does not need my attention. I realize that I don’t know what it is I need, nor do I know how to ask for that which will not distract me, or in some other way delay me.

The Holy Spirit has His eye on the journey’s end, and that is not always true about me. Sometimes, often really, I know that the peace of God is everything I want. But then other times I think I really need something else. This neediness diverts my attention from what matters and sometimes it turns me completely away from my purpose. I don’t always realize what has happened for awhile, only that I am no longer happy and at peace. So yes, I need the Holy Spirit’s help. It is never confused about what matters.

Here I seem to have so many obligations and responsibilities. I am often confused and uncertain. I suffer and I die. It is a harsh illusion in many ways. The absolute best I can do is to experience relief from this, but never be free of it for as long as I hold the illusion in place with my desire for a personal self, and with my fear to look at the unconscious guilt I have buried so deeply in my mind. Sometimes it makes me tired just thinking about it. Maybe that is why I am so attracted to the last line.

“Within himself he has no needs, for light needs nothing but to shine in peace, and from itself to let the rays extend in quiet to infinity.”

I feel like I can rest in that promise. I feel unburdened just thinking about it. Perhaps I am not “within myself” right now, but I can get a taste of this as I step back from my plans and my worries and just let the Holy Spirit provide for me.

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