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Study of Manual for Teachers 8-14-12

8-14-12
4 Let us wait here in silence, and kneel down an instant in our gratitude to Him Who called to us and helped us hear His Call. And then let us arise and go in faith along the way to Him. Now we are sure we do not walk alone. For God is here, and with Him all our brothers. Now we know that we will never lose the way again. The song begins again which had been stopped only an instant, though it seems to be unsung forever. What is here begun will grow in life and strength and hope, until the world is still an instant and forgets all that the dream of sin had made of it. 

There are many places in the Course that encourage gratitude, including some Workbook Lessons such as, Love is the way I walk in gratitude.  Here again, gratitude is encouraged. We are told to wait here in silence, and kneel down an instant in our gratitude. I am not sure why gratitude is so important, but I don’t have any trouble feeling gratitude.

I am very grateful to Jesus for remembering the truth and then being in charge of the Atonement. I can’t imagine how he did that. It has taken me 30 years to get where I am in it and I have all this help. I am also extremely grateful for A Course in Miracles and other books that have been helpful. I am so grateful for the Holy Spirit, for His unfailing presence in my mind, His guidance, His gentle persuasion and endless patience.

In gratitude I follow that guidance, and I am very grateful indeed, that I travel this road with His help and with my mighty companions. Jesus tells us that now we will never lose our way again. I wander off the path from time to time, but he is right; I never lose my way anymore. Even when I forget myself and look to the ego for guidance I see what is happening, and I choose again.

Yesterday was such a day. I reacted to something said to me and it is like I opened the door to every unhealed thought in the mind. I suppose that is good thing because it gave me that opportunity to forgive. However, it felt dark in that place for awhile as I experienced the effects of giving the ego mind my attention. And yet, even while I was in the middle of that experience, I knew it was just an experience and that it would pass.

I asked for help and of course I received it, but I had to wait until I really wanted the help. I laugh now as I think about it because I thought I was asking for healing, but really I was asking for relief. I hated the feeling of being angry and frustrated, but I also hated the idea of being wrong so I held onto it far too long, which simply means I suffered longer.

Right before I went to sleep I asked for healing and I guess I meant it. The thought I was given was to listen to the first chapters of ACIM as I slept. I did this and all night I dreamed wonderful stories of being taught about the Holy Spirit, and stories of people being led by the wise counsel of the Holy Spirit.

Jesus says that what is begun here will grow.  I feel a thrill of gratitude thinking about that, knowing that while it feels like Myron is waking up, really the whole Sonship is waking up through the story of Myron and all our stories. It grows exponentially as each of us who walk this path will be sent students, people who are ready to walk a path also, and each of them will touch many others.

We will probably have students we don’t even recognize as such, those who just need to be in the presence of a teacher of God to get the encouragement they need to take the next step. Much teaching is done without words or our conscious awareness, which is probably good, as the ego likes to play teacher, too. I am still learning to step back and let Him lead the way. 

© 2012, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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Study of Manual for Teachers 8-13-12

8-12-12
3 Be not afraid. We only start again an ancient journey long ago begun that but seems new. We have begun again upon a road we travelled on before and lost our way a little while. And now we try again. Our new beginning has the certainty the journey lacked till now. Look up and see His Word among the stars, where He has set your Name along with His. Look up and find your certain destiny the world would hide but God would have you see. 

This makes me wonder exactly what is meant. We start a journey… does this mean Holy Spirit and I? Jesus and I?  My brothers and sisters and I? Have I imagined the life of Myron over and over or have I imagined many, many different lives? Perhaps I focus my attention on a story as often as I need to until I have learned the lesson within the story, then I move to another story for awhile. It feels as though it must be many stories but I don’t really know. I don’t even understand the concept of “I”.

I know that I am not Myron. I presume I have taken on the persona of other characters, but whether I have or not, I have left Myron behind in the ritual of death and awoken to my self, but it is still a separated self. Without the story of a body and the feeling of being that body, it must feel a bit more real, and not as confusing, I would think. Without the complete amnesia we experience when we “enter” the world (maybe immerse ourselves in that experience would describe it better) it must feel so much freer.

But if there is not a complete and permanent awakening, a total enlightenment such as occurred for Jesus, then the journey is not over and presumably rebirth is chosen so we can try again. This cannot be the “I” that I truly am, the real Self, because it is still not One. It must still be part of the dream. Letting go of the idea of animating a body for a while in the dream story does not end the dream.

And yet, I exist. I exist exactly as God created me. I exist in God, as part of God, and I exist as creator. I, at this moment exist. I continue to create as God created. I have creations that know me and love me. Creation does not cease to exist simply because I am dreaming.  Some part of mind has wondered off on an adventure and is being called back home. My focus seems to be on the part that is dreaming of this strange world of separation with its impossible possibilities.

Jesus tells us that the world is old and tired. We are beginning to realize that it is time to let go of the adventure, to return to our Self and that is what is happening. That is the reason this time the journey is going to have a different ending. This time we began the journey with a new certainty. We have seen past the world to the truth that has been kept perfectly safe for us.

It seems that we need to waken gently, allowing the memory to surface in its own way and in its own time. The death of the body does not awaken us; it does nothing but end a certain story, an experience of a certain body. But we will awaken, because we already have. We are one with Jesus and he has awakened, therefore so have we. Now we are only using time to accept what has happened. We are forgiving the dream and allowing it to end.

© 2012, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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Study of Manual for Teachers 8-12-12

8-12-12
2 You are a stranger here. But you belong to Him Who loves you as He loves Himself. Ask but my help to roll the stone away, and it is done according to His Will. We have begun the journey. Long ago the end was written in the stars and set into the Heavens with a shining Ray that held it safe within eternity and through all time as well. And holds it still; unchanged, unchanging and unchangeable.

Boy, have I ever felt like a stranger here! A stranger in a strange land, as Robert Heinlein phrased it. Most Course students I have met have expressed the same sentiments. In fact, if you have not yet noticed that the world is strangely off kilter, not right somehow, then you likely don’t have any interest in finding your way out and A Course in Miracles will not interest you.

Knowing that this is a very strange world, indeed, and knowing that I did not fit in, ever, was a first step to awakening. Knowing this first thing without knowing there was a solution was disconcerting and sometimes deeply upsetting. I expect a lot of the insane things I did when I was young was directly related to knowing something was wrong but not knowing what it was or what to do about it, and afraid that the wrong thing was me.

When I first discovered A Course in Miracles I was on top of the world one moment, and confused and afraid in the next. I wanted it to be true, but almost no one else even knew about it.  When my ex husband found out I was studying it he made an effort to save me. He had heard that it was some kind of cult. I was very touched that he would be so generous as I knew that he was uncomfortable in that role. Somehow in spite of how different it was from anything I had ever read, I was compelled to keep reading and just “knew” this was right.

I was on my own studying for a long time and anytime I met someone else who studied it I was just astounded, and not a little relieved. It was good to know that if I was crazy to be doing this strange course at least I was not the only one. Now of course, I have lots of company and I have started thinking of us as the only sane ones in the world.

It is no kind of stretch for me now to realize that I do have a place; it is just not in this world. I belong to God. So does everyone else, but I know I belong to God. I am as God created me, and where He created me. Oh yes, there is no “where.” We made that up. Oh well. However it works, I am in God and of God and nothing can change that.

When I have those periodic amnesiac moments and forget my Self, I begin to think I am someplace else and something else, but that doesn’t make it true. My truth was written in the stars and set into the Heavens with a shining Ray that held it safe within eternity and through all time as well. I don’t have to worry about losing myself anymore.

When I become temporarily confused again, I just rest in God and wait for sanity to return. It might look like I am upset, but that is just an appearance. Under that appearance is certainty that is borne of experience and something greater than experience, something more certain. I don’t have a clear understanding of it but I realize now that doesn’t matter. I am just grateful for it.

© 2012, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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Study of Manual for Teachers 8-11-12

8-11-12
EPILOGUE
1 Forget not once this journey is begun the end is certain. Doubt along the way will come and go and go to come again. Yet is the ending sure. No one can fail to do what God appointed him to do. When you forget, remember that you walk with Him and with His Word upon your heart. Who could despair when hope like this is his? Illusions of despair may seem to come, but learn how not to be deceived by them. Behind each one there is reality and there is God. Why would you wait for this and trade it for illusions, when His Love is but an instant farther on the road where all illusions end? The end is sure and guaranteed by God. Who stands before a lifeless image when a step away the Holy of the Holies opens up an ancient door that leads beyond the world?

This is the perfect paragraph for me to study today. I had one of those moments of doubt. It came last night and was still here this morning. I sat in front of the computer to do my study and realized that the doubt was clouding my mind. I talked to the Holy Spirit about it. I knew as soon as the doubt showed up that it was false, and so the feelings it brought with it were false as well.

It is still strange to me how this can happen. I can feel anger or fear or sadness and at the same time know that this is not real. The lovely thing is, because I don’t believe in them, I cannot feel these things as strongly as I used to and not for as long. So I sat with Holy Spirit and felt His comforting presence and waited for His answer.

The first sane thought was to say the prayer I learned from Barbara. Holy Spirit, please come into my mind and undo what I have done. Then I remembered not to resist. I let the feelings come. I let the thoughts come. I cried a little because the tears seem to be part of the allowing. As I watched all of this happening, and paid attention to the thoughts without judging them, I realized that all I was looking at was guilt.

That was good news because guilt is not real. I made guilt up. God did not create guilt so it must be part of the illusion. If it is not real, I don’t have to listen to it. I don’t have to believe it. I don’t have to do anything about it. I had asked the Holy Spirit to undo what I have done and so the mistake has been corrected. I felt a sense of relief wash over me, followed by peace.

Shortly after, I had the opportunity to share about this and that reinforces the healing.  I also asked the Holy Spirit to let me know if there is anything for me to “do” about the circumstances around this situation and the perfect opportunity occurred. The perfect words came to me without any thought on my part.

As I do this work I am learning trust. I am learning to trust myself. I am learning to trust what Jesus is teaching me through A Course in Miracles. I am learning to trust that which lives me. I am learning to trust the Holy Spirit in my mind. I am learning to trust God. Even the moments of doubt are tempered by trust. I am so grateful.

© 2012, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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Study of Manual for Teachers 8-10-12

8-10-12
5 You are His manifestation in this world. Your brother calls to you to be His Voice along with him. Alone he cannot be the Helper of God’s Son for he alone is functionless. But joined with you he is the shining Savior of the world, Whose part in its redemption you have made complete. He offers thanks to you as well as him for you arose with him when he began to save the world. And you will be with him when time is over and no trace remains of dreams of spite in which you dance to death’s thin melody. For in its place the hymn to God is heard a little while. And then the Voice is gone, no longer to take form but to return to the eternal formlessness of God. 

Just as Jesus is the manifestation of the Holy Spirit in the world, so are we when we choose to be God’s teachers. Jesus calls us to teach with him, to be a Helper of God’s Son. We answer this call when we allow our mind to be healed. My nearly constant prayer for the last few days is one my friend, Barbara, shared with me. Holy Spirit, come into my mind and undo what I have done.

I use this prayer to undo the false thoughts in my mind. I use it when I read the paper or hear the news. Did someone kill his or her brother? That someone is me. We are one, which means that everyone is a manifestation of my one Self. The one that murdered is my belief that I must eliminate the effects of my thoughts in order to be happy. He is the belief that violence will somehow solve my problems. These are false thoughts and since they are in my awareness I can offer them for healing.

How odd that I used to think I could heal someone else. There is no one else. We join as one (recognize our Oneness) to heal the One.  Jesus accepted as his function the completion of the Atonement, but he needs our help. Alone he has no function. He needs us to join with him to save the world. It is the remembrance of our Oneness that we seek, and it is through joining with Jesus in this holy purpose that we achieve our purpose. 

There are many ways that we can do our part. This simple prayer I am using is one way. I used to read the paper in morbid fascination at the many ways we hurt each other. I used to scare myself with stories of mayhem and cruelty. As I began to learn that this story of life I took so seriously was not real, I would read the paper and try to remember the truth. I failed in this because I was trying to find the truth using the ego thinking mind. It doesn’t know the truth.

I tried to avoid the bad news, sticking my head in the sand and telling myself that this is how I am to remember that the world is not real. I will just deny it by closing my eyes to it. This didn’t work either. The mayhem and cruelty were in my mind so there was no way to escape from it. Pretending I don’t see the effects of the belief in separation is not the way to heal the separation idea.

Accepting that what Jesus tells us through A Course in Miracles is the truth is the way to salvation. I accept that I am not this story or this body and neither are any of us. I accept that no one is guilty because nothing has happened. No one is guilty because guilt is a concept as illusional as the body. I accept that there is only one of us. We are joined as one in Mind, perfect and wholly innocent.

All that I see and experience is the effect of believing a false idea, the idea that separation could exist and that I want to feel its effects. I did this and I can undo it by simply desiring that it be undone. Reading the paper is no longer frightening or upsetting. It is now a happy occasion to join with Jesus as Savior of the world. I read the story of separation in whatever form it seems to take this morning knowing that this is my chance to ask that what I have done be undone. What a wonderful way to start the day!

As each of us take up our part in joining with Jesus to heal the mind, the world is saved. For a while we will enjoy our experiment with the impossible and see the world as it is without the stain of guilt. Then all will cease to exist as a separate thing and we will return to the formlessness of God. I have nothing to say about that because I cannot imagine what it must feel like to be free of form and to know my Self as part of God. For now, I will just stick to the task in front of me, joining with Jesus as the manifestation of the Holy Spirit in the world, by healing the mind every chance I get.

© 2012, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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Study of Manual for Teachers8-9-12

8-9-12
4 The Holy Spirit abides in the part of your mind that is part of the Christ Mind. He represents your Self and your Creator, Who are One. He speaks for God and also for you, being joined with Both. And therefore it is He Who proves Them One. He seems to be a Voice, for in that form He speaks God’s Word to you. He seems to be a Guide through a far country, for you need that form of help. He seems to be whatever meets the needs you think you have. But He is not deceived when you perceive your self entrapped in needs you do not have. It is from these He would deliver you. It is from these that He would make you safe. 

Where is the Holy Spirit? He is in my split mind. He is in the part that represents my true Self and my Creator. And listen to this; He represents my Self and my Creator, Who are One. If I had any doubt about my identity as this body and this personality known as Myron, it is laid to rest in this sentence. I am One with my Creator. I cannot be Myron.

Myron is a small separated self whose mind runs amuck, who is afraid of many things and feels her vulnerability acutely. Her fragile body experiences sickness and suffers. Her emotions go all over the place and only occasionally do they express joy. Peace is a sporadic state. Does this sound like God? I don’t think so. And yet, I and my Creator are One. I must not be Myron.

Since I am not Myron, I am not her thoughts either. When she judges someone that does not make me judgmental. When she hates someone that does not make me hateful. When she has fearful thoughts that does not make me fearful. I am in no way defined by Myron’s thoughts. Nor do her actions or her words define me. I am not Myron so what does her behavior have to do with who I am? I am still as God created me because I am one with God. The Holy Spirit in my mind speaks for both my Self and for God, because He is joined with Both and so proves I am One with God.

How does the Holy Spirit help? He is the Voice that speaks God’s word to me. He is the Guide that helps me return to God. He meets whatever needs I think I have. When I sit at a keyboard and ask for His help to understand what I read, He gives me understanding. When I forget who I am He reminds me. When I become confused about reality He gently guides me back to truth. When I become afraid He comforts me. I cannot be any of these things of course, because I am Self, I am Son of God; I am perfect and whole and have no needs. But while I think I have needs, Holy Spirit answers my confusion with the truth.

What is it the Holy Spirit does not do? He does not become confused. He does not ever believe in my needs and my fears. If I hear a voice in my mind that says I am in trouble, or that I am sinful, or that I deserve what I got, I know it is not the Voice for God. He does not believe in my delusions. He knows I have them; it is His function to save me from them, but He is not fooled by them. The Holy Spirit is not here to save me from danger, but to save me from my belief that I am in danger.

This is what He does for me, but what does the Holy Spirit do for Myron? Well, nothing, of course. Myron is just a projection of a confused and delusional mind. Why would anyone fix a projection? It is the mind that needs help, not its projections. The story of Myron is helpful only as a screen on which I can see what it looks like to believe these separation thoughts. Myron is a picture of the needs I think I have.

I could feel bad for Myron if she was real, or afraid for her, if she was real. Because she is not real, I don’t ask the Holy Spirit to fix her body or her life. I ask, instead for the healing of my mind.  Occasionally I have an identity crisis and forget who I am. Then I ask for help for Myron as if she were the one who needed it. Holy Spirit is gentle though, and never tries to jerk me back to reality; He just continues to whisper the truth into my Heart as always.  I love that Holy Spirit.

© 2012, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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Study of Manual for Teachers 8-8-12

8-8-12
3 The Holy Spirit is described as the remaining Communication Link between God and His separated Sons. In order to fulfill this special function the Holy Spirit has assumed a dual function. He knows because He is part of God; He perceives because He was sent to save humanity. He is the great correction principle; the bringer of true perception, the inherent power of the vision of Christ. He is the light in which the forgiven world is perceived; in which the face of Christ alone is seen. He never forgets the Creator or His creation. He never forgets the Son of God. He never forgets you. And He brings the Love of your Father to you in an eternal shining that will never be obliterated because God has put it there.

This is one of my favorite paragraphs in the Manual for Teachers. There simply are not words to express the gratitude I feel for the presence of the Holy Spirit in my mind. He is the link between me and God because He both knows and sees. He knows the truth and sees my illusion. It is through His function that I am able to bridge the gap I created when I believed my own thoughts.

Being like God I have a creative mind. Though creation can only extend and so never create unlike itself, mind can think about anything and make up scenarios without any limits. The results are illusions but very vivid and believable illusions, and without the Love that inspires true creation, they can seem painful, indeed. I have been so lost in my stories that I forgot they were stories and mistook them for reality. It is the Holy Spirit in my mind that sees the story, but remembers the truth. It is my desire to be free of the story that invites this Correction to heal my mind and restore me to sanity. 

As my mind began to clear I went from believing the Holy Spirit instructed me and guided me as I healed myself, to an understanding that I am healed through the Holy Spirit. I give Him my perceptions and He corrects them. I bring Him my sickness and He heals it. I bring Him my confusion and He gives me clarity.

Studying the Manual for Teachers has changed the way I view the Holy Spirit. I cannot say I understand what the Holy Spirit is, but I understand Him differently now. And truly, what is my understanding anyway except the thinking mind trying to pin Him down and put Him in a recognizable box. It’s funny even to think of it. An ant looking at its hill and thinking it understands the universe now.

  What matters to me is that I know my part and I understand that the Holy Spirit is my savior, my way Home. He is the gift from God that keeps me from being forever lost in my own imaginings. This passage brings me to tears every time I read it.

He never forgets the Creator or His creation. He never forgets the Son of God. He never forgets you. And He brings the Love of your Father to you in an eternal shining that will never be obliterated because God has put it there.

I feel like a little child who in her imaginative play wandered out of site of home and thought she was lost forever, only to realize that her mom knew exactly where she was and came to bring her home again. My mom would not leave me alone to wander endlessly afraid hopeless. She would never forget me.

  Holy Spirit, thank you for the light you shine into my darkened mind. Thank you for never forgetting me. Thank you for teaching me to laugh at my imaginings. Thank you for guiding me Home. Thank you for reminding me of the love I have for my Father and of the love He has for me, eternally.

© 2012, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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