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Study of Text, C 15: III. Littleness versus Magnitude, P 10, 11-29-17

III. Littleness versus Magnitude, P 10
10 Decide with me, who has decided to abide with you. I will as my Father wills, knowing His Will is constant and at peace forever with itself. You will be content with nothing but His Will. Accept no less, remembering that everything I learned is yours. What my Father loves I love as He does, and I can no more accept it as what it is not, than He can. And no more can you. When you have learned to accept what you are, you will make no more gifts to offer to yourself, for you will know you are complete, in need of nothing, and unable to accept anything for yourself. But you will gladly give, having received. The host of God needs not seek to find anything.

Journal
Last night I started to feel sick. I could tell I had a fever and I felt congested. I was disappointed. I have been around sick people and I had decided not to believe in “catching” sickness, which is clearly not possible. I can only decide on a thing, not succumb to a thing. And yet, here I am with congestion. This morning I don’t feel really bad, but I am aware of some physical symptoms. The ego-mind wants to make the body the focus of attention. I’m really grateful for this passage to work on this morning as it is helping me to see this differently.

What I did was to read it in first person. I said to myself that I will decide with Jesus, who has decided to abide with me. I am filled with love and gratitude to my brother that he has decided to abide with me. He wills as God wills and I will follow suit. I will as God wills and God wills perfection. I don’t feel perfect right now when I identify with the body, but I remain perfect none-the-less. As I shift my focus from the body to mind, I notice that sickness of the body fades from awareness.

As I am more able to accept nothing less than God’s Will, I remember that everything Jesus learned is mine. Jesus does not accept sickness and suffering as real or necessary, so there is no reason for me to do so either. When I focus on the body and believe I am the body, I suffer what the body suffers. When I focus on the truth of my being and what that means, I am unaware of the body sensations.

It is interesting and enlightening to watch this in action. I think about what is going on in the body and I feel bad. I forget about the body and think about my quiet time with Jesus as he clarifies his Course for me, and I feel good. Back and forth this goes and I see clearly that sickness and suffering are only as real as I make them.

It is also quite interesting how drawn I am to pay attention to the bodily symptoms even though I have proven it is neither necessary or in my best interest to do so. What a strange gift I give myself, this idea of sickness that I have projected onto the body. I will to accept what I am in truth rather than what the ego mind says I am. I don’t need these “gifts” of the ego, being complete as God created me. I give the Holy Spirit these twisted thoughts of sickness and suffering and ask that He heal my mind of them.

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Manual for Teacher: IV. Gentleness, P 1. 11-28-17

IV. Gentleness

1 Harm is impossible for God’s teachers. They can neither harm nor be harmed. Harm is the outcome of judgment. It is the dishonest act that follows a dishonest thought. It is a verdict of guilt upon a brother, and therefore on oneself. It is the end of peace and the denial of learning. It demonstrates the absence of God’s curriculum, and its replacement by insanity. No teacher of God but must learn,-and fairly early in his training,-that harmfulness completely obliterates his function from his awareness. It will make him confused, fearful, angry and suspicious. It will make the Holy Spirit’s lessons impossible to learn. Nor can God’s Teacher be heard at all, except by those who realize that harm can actually achieve nothing. No gain can come of it.

Journal
Someone I love very much became angry with me. There was a time when I would have been distraught over this. I would have worried and fretted and tried to think of some way to fix it. I might even have given in to the emotional blackmail. I simply could not have tolerated the situation. I would also have been resentful and resentment is guilt, and guilt is harmful. I would have felt harmed and blamed my loved one for harming me.

But that is not what happened. My mind has experienced a lot of healing and I don’t see things the same way anymore. I did give it a lot of thought to be sure I was doing the best thing. I regretted the disharmony. But, I didn’t feel like I was being harmful because there was no blame projected. I understood the fear that was driving my loved one. I did not feel like I was being harmed because I did not accept the judgment being directed at me. It was such a different way to experience this. In the end, it all worked out.

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Manual for Teacher: Tolerance.  11-24-17

III. Tolerance
1 God’s teachers do not judge. To judge is to be dishonest, for to judge is to assume a position you do not have. Judgment without self-deception is impossible. Judgment implies that you have been deceived in your brothers. How, then, could you not have been deceived in yourself? Judgment implies a lack of trust, and trust remains the bedrock of the teacher of God’s whole thought system. Let this be lost, and all his learning goes. Without judgment are all things equally acceptable, for who could judge otherwise? Without judgment are all men brothers, for who is there who stands apart? Judgment destroys honesty and shatters trust. No teacher of God can judge and hope to learn.

Journal
I had not thought of judgment as dishonest until I read this paragraph. If I judge someone or something, I am being dishonest because I am deceiving myself. I am saying that I am in a position to judge. I know this is not true. I accept that I cannot know everything there is to know that would allow me to judge.

If I judge my brothers, it is because I do not trust them. When I allow my sight to stop at the body and the personality of my brothers, I see only what the ego mind has made up. Looking only at that, it seems reasonable to judge them, even necessary. But if I allow vision to enlighten me to their reality, I know who they are and I have reason to trust. When I remember that trust is the foundation of the teacher of God’s thought system I feel compelled to rest on that trust, and the desire to judge fades away.

I was thinking about this very thing recently. I have a relative that I have judged. It didn’t hit my radar as judgment because I cloaked it in spiritual ideas and compassionate sounding words. Being with this person during the holidays was tense until I noticed what I was doing and stopped. I began to believe in him and to trust him. Then everything felt sweet and there was peace and laughter. It felt like a heavy cloud had blown away and the sun shined brightly on our family.

It is so important that we not judge that Jesus said that no teacher of God can judge and hope to learn. All other considerations put aside, this reason alone compels me to be vigilant for judgment in my mind. I watch for judgment of myself, especially. This is where I tend to be harshest, and judgment of self is as dishonest and as distressing as any other form of judgment. I cannot, in honesty, judge myself because I did not create myself. To judge myself is tantamount to judging God. May I be tolerant of all living things, myself included.

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Study of Text, C 15: III. Littleness versus Magnitude, P 9, 11-22-17

III. Littleness versus Magnitude, P 9
9 Holy child of God, when will you learn that only holiness can content you and give you peace? Remember that you learn not for yourself alone, no more than I did. It is because I learned for you that you can learn of me. I would but teach you what is yours, so that together we can replace the shabby littleness that binds the host of God to guilt and weakness with the glad awareness of the glory that is in him. My birth in you is your awakening to grandeur. Welcome me not into a manger, but into the altar to holiness, where holiness abides in perfect peace. My Kingdom is not of this world because it is in you. And you are of your Father. Let us join in honoring you, who must remain forever beyond littleness.

Journal
This entire section is trying to awaken us to our glory. Nearly everyone on the earth thinks of himself/herself as alone, small, and fragile. This is not who we are. This body/personality self is an idea projected outward. It is an opportunity to play-act something that cannot happen in reality, like a child playing at being Batman or Superman.

Jesus is inviting us to remember that we are only play-acting this character and that in reality, we are part of God, exactly like God in every way. In Lesson 326, Jesus says this about us as part of a beautiful prayer.
I am forever Your Effect, and You forever and forever are my Cause. As You created me I have remained. Where You established me I still abide. And all Your attributes abide in me, because it is Your Will to have a Son so like his Cause that Cause and Its Effect are indistinguishable.

Does this sound like the self you are presently identified with? In our unity, we are exactly like God, indistinguishable from God.

And now Jesus is telling us that he is here with us right now, and he is with us to teach us, to awaken us to our birthright. He is here to help us to accept our holiness and our grandeur. He says we can have this awareness when we stop clinging to our guilt and our littleness. All day today I have committed to living as if this were done. When I start to feel some concern for time or circumstance, I stop and rest a moment in God and remember that today I am living as an awakened Christ. I question if this is the response of an awakened being. It is going to be great fun!

Jesus says, “My birth in you is your awakening to grandeur.” Of course, he is not saying that the man, Jesus, is birthed in us, but as the Christ, He is born in us and awakens us to grandeur. He goes on to say that his Kingdom is not of the world but is in us. In us! We are the Kingdom! So, yes, we remain far beyond the little self we pretend to be. Let us welcome our destiny and accept it now. Let us throw off guilt and with it fear and be the Divine Beings we were created. Now, this warrants a celebration of Thanksgiving!

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Manual for Teachers: II. Honesty, P 2. 11-21-17

II. Honesty, P 2

2 The peace of mind which the advanced teachers of God experience is largely due to their perfect honesty. It is only the wish to deceive that makes for war. No one at one with himself can even conceive of conflict. Conflict is the inevitable result of self-deception, and self-deception is dishonesty. There is no challenge to a teacher of God. Challenge implies doubt, and the trust on which God’s teachers rest secure makes doubt impossible. Therefore they can only succeed. In this, as in all things, they are honest. They can only succeed, because they never do their will alone. They choose for all mankind; for all the world and all things in it; for the unchanging and unchangeable beyond appearances; and for the Son of God and his Creator. How could they not succeed? They choose in perfect honesty, sure of their choice as of themselves.

Journal
This vision of the advanced teachers of God is so compelling that I long for it to be true for me in all circumstances. It is true for me sometimes now, maybe even most of the time. But I still have areas in my life where I experience conflict. Jesus says that this is the result of self-deception. For instance, yesterday I was riding with my daughter. She was just driving around to put the baby to sleep and took me down a road beside the river. She thought I would enjoy it because it is so pretty there.

She began to notice that I was tense and remarked on it. I said that I don’t enjoy riding right next to the water like that. There was very little bank and the road was almost level with the river. There is something about drop-offs like that that make me uneasy. For some reason, instead of just being uneasy, I became frightened. Probably, this happened because I have asked to look at whatever is left in my mind that is in error so that it can be undone, so I needed to feel the effect of this belief.

This fear of heights and other forms of drop-offs like with the river running so close to the road is self-deception. It is in contrast or in conflict with my belief that I am safe, that no matter what happens to the body, I remain safe. Understanding this, I see that it is not a fear of heights or fear of dropping off the road and into the river that needs correction. It is the belief that I am a body and so what happens to the body happens to me. I can’t believe that I am the Son of God and believe that I am this body. Those thoughts conflict and cause me distress.

So, I spent the rest of the day going back and forth with this. I know I am not this body, that I am spirit. I know that I am afraid of this body falling. Yikes! It makes no sense and this is distressing. Eventually, I must choose to believe in one or the other and believing I am a body is just not possible. So, I ask for correction of this insane belief that I can ever be in danger. I am so done with this fearful belief. I ask the Holy Spirit to remove it from my mind.

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Study of Text, C 15: III. Littleness versus Magnitude, P 8, 11-20-17

III. Littleness versus Magnitude, P 8
8 Is it a sacrifice to leave littleness behind, and wander not in vain? It is not sacrifice to wake to glory. But it is sacrifice to accept anything less than glory. Learn that you must be worthy of the Prince of Peace, born in you in honor of Him Whose host you are. You know not what love means because you have sought to purchase it with little gifts, thus valuing it too little to understand its magnitude. Love is not little and love dwells in you, for you are host to Him. Before the greatness that lives in you, your poor appreciation of yourself and all the little offerings you give slip into nothingness.

Journal
What will I leave behind to accept my glory? What will I sacrifice? I will no longer be able to gather, organize and decipher information in order to make a decision. That is my sacrifice. Instead, I will simply ask for an answer and it will occur intuitively without any effort on my part. At least that has been my experience when I have asked rather than trying to work out the answer on my own.

I will not be worried or anxious about life. Fear is what I will sacrifice. Instead, I will simply accept that what is occurring is in my best interests and in everyone else’s best interest. If I can’t see how that is true, I will ask for clarity, and never doubt or be concerned. I will accept the perfection of all things and simply wait for guidance on what to do next.

I will no longer look for guilt or accept it when it shows up in my mind. Guilt is what I will sacrifice. Instead, I will accept that the host to God could not be guilty. There is no place for guilt in God. If I think I am guilty or someone else is guilty, I must be confused and will simply ask for clarity until I see the truth.  With no guilt within or without, love will be all that is there to be seen and felt. My life now revolves around love rather than guilt. Instead of looking for the guilty party, I ask how it is that I can best extend love to each one that shows up in my life. This is so much better.

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Manual for Teacher: II. Honesty, P 1. 11-16-17

II. Honesty
1 All other traits of God’s teachers rest on trust. Once that has been achieved, the others cannot fail to follow. Only the trusting can afford honesty, for only they can see its value. Honesty does not apply only to what you say. The term actually means consistency. There is nothing you say that contradicts what you think or do; no thought opposes any other thought; no act belies your word; and no word lacks agreement with another. Such are the truly honest. At no level are they in conflict with themselves. Therefore it is impossible for them to be in conflict with anyone or anything.

Journal
When I was young, I was not honest by any definition of honesty, but as my mind began to heal, that changed. By the time I got to the Manual for Teachers, I thought I was honest. As I read this paragraph, I realized what it meant to be truly honest and I felt like it was a hopeless task. I wondered if I could be a teacher of God if I had most of the characteristics.

What I failed to notice at that time was the first sentence. All other traits of God’s teachers rest on trust. Eventually, my trust began to develop and as it did, my honesty became more consistent. It is hard for me to believe, but as I read this paragraph today, I see that I am honest. Or pretty darned close to it.

I still believe a few thoughts that are not in alignment with the other thoughts, but even they are fading away as I continue to bring them to the Holy Spirit to look at with me. I speak the words that are true for me, and occasionally, I hear myself speak words that are not true for me. Again, I quickly look at them with the Holy Spirit and ask Him to remove the beliefs that were the source of my dishonesty.

I was thinking of an example of dishonesty in my life at this time. Here is what came into my mind. I teach that we are all worthy. I teach it all the time. I quote Jesus when he said that our worthiness is not established by what we say or do, but that it was established in our creation. But then, I start noticing things about myself that belie that statement.

For instance, last night at my Al-Anon meeting, we talked about asking for help. I used to be so determined to not ask for help that I think if I had a heart attack, I would die before I would ask for help. I could only hope that someone noticed and helped me without being asked. I am not that opposed to asking anymore, but I still resist it. I still feel uncomfortable asking.

This can only be because I feel unworthy still, and so expect rejection and cannot chance rejection since that might prove my unworthiness. Well, shoot! But I am glad to see this. I was keeping it secret from myself and now I am not. Perhaps now is the time that I can become consistently honest in this area. I am asking the Holy Spirit to heal my mind of the belief that I could be something other than what God created me to be.

So I am not perfectly honest yet, but I see my way through to honesty and know that I can and will be honest. I am grateful for this transformation. It is a long way from the first response I had to this paragraph. I am willing to trust the Word of God through Jesus, through the Holy Spirit. That is a perfectly honest statement. I am willing and I will to do so.

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