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II. Littleness versus Magnitude, P 6
6 The Holy Spirit can hold your magnitude, clean of all littleness, clearly and in perfect safety in your mind, untouched by every little gift the world of littleness would offer you. But for this, you cannot side against Him in what He wills for you. Decide for God through Him. For littleness, and the belief that you can be content with littleness, are decisions you make about yourself. The power and the glory that lie in you from God are for all who, like you, perceive themselves as little, and believe that littleness can be blown up into a sense of magnitude that can content them. Neither give littleness, nor accept it. All honor is due the host of God. Your littleness deceives you, but your magnitude is of Him Who dwells in you, and in Whom you dwell. Touch no one, then, with littleness in the Name of Christ, eternal Host unto His Father.
Journal
I find it very reassuring to know that the Holy Spirit can keep my magnitude clean of arrogance. I want to live in my magnitude but not let it be tainted by the ego needs and desires. In the past, I tended to play small because I was afraid of this. I was afraid to claim the power of God in me, afraid my ego mind would be using it. This was because I was not yet clearly identified with my Self and still often I identified as my ego. Now, it is the other way around, and I am clear that the ego is on the way out, and I am not afraid of it anymore.
For the Holy Spirit to guard my magnitude, I must watch the decisions I make about myself and let Him decide for God for me. For instance, I am a minister, a teacher, and an author. If I decide that makes me special and that people should treat me special because of it, I am deciding against God. I am using my gifts to inflate my littleness to give me a false sense of magnitude.
If this were to happen, I would ask the Holy Spirit to correct my thinking by deciding for God for me. This is how I do my part to side with the Holy Spirit. I simply give Him permission to correct me when I am misusing the power of God that is in me. I feel pretty safe with this power now. I know the difference now between being arrogant and being truly humble. I feel safe claiming magnitude because I am happy that I am being used for His purposes and I know that I am not useful through the ego-self but through my surrender of the ego self.
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