Love's Vision: A Healing Journey of Remembering Love's Truth

By Rev. Maureen Yarbrough

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Part 2: The Ego Was Born to Protect You

“The ego is a device for maintaining separation.” (T:Ch 11-V.1)

Recently I found myself reflecting on a difficult interaction at work.

The situation itself wasn’t extraordinary. It was one of those moments that many of us experience—a comment, a tone, a misunderstanding. Yet my reaction felt larger than the moment itself.

As I sat with it, I began asking a deeper question:

“What exactly am I protecting?”

That question changed everything.

Like many people, I spent much of my life becoming competent. I learned how to manage, teach, lead, solve problems, and care for others. I became someone people could depend upon.

From the outside, that looks like confidence.

But spiritual growth has taught me that confidence and protection are not always the same thing.

Sometimes what appears to be strength is actually armor.

The more honestly I looked at my own life, the more I realized that many of my defenses had once served a purpose.

The desire to do things well.

The tendency to work harder.

The need to be prepared.

The wish to be appreciated.

The discomfort when I feel misunderstood.

None of these qualities are inherently wrong. In fact, many helped me build a meaningful life and career.

Yet beneath them, I sometimes discover a part of myself that still wonders:

“Am I enough?”

“Am I valued?”

“Do I belong?”

The ego was born to answer those questions through achievement, approval, control, and protection.

But the soul seeks a different answer.

A Course in Miracles teaches that fear is not our natural state. Love is.

When I look honestly at my own perfectionism, people-pleasing, or desire to be understood, I no longer see flaws.

I see a self who was trying to stay safe.

And rather than judging her, I have learned to thank her.

Thank you for protecting me.

Thank you for helping me survive.

Thank you for getting me here.

I don’t have to carry this burden anymore.

God is carrying me now.

Healing began for me when I stopped treating the ego as an enemy and started seeing it as a frightened protector.

The ego built the armor.

Spirit invites us to lay it down.

Not all at once.

Not perfectly.

But gently.

One layer at a time.

“You will defend the ego because you believe that it is you.” (T:Ch 6:IV)

The miracle occurs when we stop asking, “How do I get rid of my ego?” and begin asking, “What fear is this defense trying to protect?”

The answer is almost always some version of the same ancient wound: the belief that we are separate from Love.

Yet the Holy Spirit continually reminds us that separation never truly occurred.

Our task is not to become worthy of God’s love.

Our task is to remember that we have never been without it.

As the ego softens, something beautiful begins to emerge.

We become less defensive.

Less controlling.

Less concerned with approval.

Less attached to being right.

And more available to peace.

The armor begins to fall away.

What remains is not weakness.

What remains is truth.

The truth that beneath every defense, beneath every fear, beneath every story of inadequacy, there remains the radiant Self God created—whole, innocent, and forever loved.

That is the Self that was waiting beneath the armor all along.

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