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A LETTER TO MY FRIENDS

Hello to all of you from down here in hurricane land. If you are wondering if the media reports about what is going on are overblown, let me assure you that they only begin to cover the horror of this illusion.

However, when we set up fearful illusions of this magnitude, we are giving ourselves opportunities of the same magnitude. We are giving so many of us the opportunity to forgive on a grand scale, and to do so repeatedly. As soon as the horror subsides somewhat, I am sure the finger pointing will begin. At the moment, everyone is giving from the heart and this is bringing people together. The problem is, a month down the road when the refugees are still here, still reminding us of our frailty and vulnerability, will resentment set in?

As it is going on in the moment, it is a challenge to be in the illusion while not of the illusion. The church I work with down here is assisting several families. It is a financial burden for such a small church with so few resources, but everyone agreed to do it anyway. A request for financial assistance was met warmly by many who are “seemingly” untouched by what is happening. (Thanks to all of you who are helping) I am seeing a coming together of the members of the church and an increased sense of unity and the importance of having a spiritual community. Everyone is stretching their spiritual muscles in many ways; the ways that seem lovely to see, as well as through the conflicts that arise.

As I became aware of all that had happened and continues to happen, I realized that I was feeling a lot of anxiety. I am doing 905 again and there is a meditation that I used to help me rise above. I am also becoming aware of how hard it is to stay in that place as I am daily confronted with so much misery, pain, and confusion. I think that if I remember to bring even half of these wrong-minded thoughts the the Holy Spirit for correction, I will experience a real time collapse, and come out of it much further ahead when it all ends. Please keep me and all of the others in your prayers. There is just as much opportunity for growth and blessings in this situation as there is for fear. We are helped to choose for God when we are supported by our brother in that effort. I feel so lucky to have the Pathways family to support me. If you would like to contribute monetarily to this relief effort please contact me at .(JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address)

Love to you all,
Myron

© 2005, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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The Hurricane Within and The Hurricane Without

This is a sermon I delivered at a local church after Hurricane Katrina hit Louisiana and Mississippi.

I hear people talk about the hurricane and its aftermath. They are looking for some kind of larger meaning. I hear people say that it is God purging evil, punishing and testing his children. I do believe there is a greater meaning, but I know my God, and He is not a punishing God. God loves me completely and unconditionally. He loves me because He created me.

He does not need to test me. Because He created me he is certain of me, as He is certain of Himself. To doubt His creations, God would have to doubt Himself. Doubt is a human quality that we sometimes project onto God, but if we give it even a little thought we can see how patently absurd it is to see God as uncertain and doubtful.

As I look for the larger meaning of what has happened here, I see that what we experience in our outer world is a reflection of what is happening within ourselves, and within each of us is a little hurricane, brewing discontent. Each time we look with judgment upon a brother, the winds of this hurricane pick up. Each time we treat someone in a way we would not want to be treated ourselves, the hurricane within picks up momentum.

Every time we see someone suffering and look the other way, our own personal hurricane grows bigger. When we look at our brother and say he is wrong, he is different, he is less than, we sow the seeds of inner destruction. When we construct these invisible barriers that separate us from other brothers; he is from another country, speaks a different language, is a different color, has a different sexual orientation, goes to a different church, worships God in a different way, votes differently from me, watches movies and reads books I don?t approve of, raises their children differently than I do (the list is endless) we separate and make different.

God is not a god of separation and divisiveness. He is a God of unity and love. He is a God of inclusiveness. He made us in His image and so we, too, are meant to be united and loving and inclusive. When we see ourselves differently from the way God created us, the storm within brews.

God does not make hurricanes, or tsunamis, or earthquakes. God is not a murderer who destroys thousands of people. But God is in these situations. He is in this specific situation, and His presence brings meaning to what is happening to all of us. Because He is in this situation, we have His love and His comfort to sustain us. We have His strength to draw upon.

In order to calm the hurricane within, and to clean up the aftermath of these destructive thoughts, we only need to turn to our Father for help. We can bring Him our thoughts of separation and judgment, of guilt and fear, and He will lift us above the battleground of our inner turmoil. He will show us another way to think and to live.

In the aftermath of Katrina, we are given abundant opportunities to practice in the world the healing we want to effect within. We have the chance to give of our time, our energy, our money, and our spiritual support to those who now need us. If we are tempted to say that we want to help this one but not that one, we are given the opportunity to receive healing for that thought. Just as it rains on the just and the unjust, we send our love and support to all regardless of judgments we are tempted to make.

In this way we clean up after our inner hurricane as we clean up after the outer manifestation of that destructive force. There are so many opportunities for us right now. I don?t want to miss a one of them. When I see signs of bad behavior or seeming ingratitude, I have a choice in how I choose to perceive this. I can choose with my little ego and experience anger. Or I can choose with God and recognize these are a desperate and fearful people calling out for love in the only way they are able at this time. One choice feeds the next hurricane within, and the other feeds peace instead.

For those who have lost everything and are facing financial ruin, and perhaps have missing or lost relatives, there is a choice as well. Choose the unproductive path of anger and hopelessness, and certainly they won?t have to look far for justification for this choice, or choose for God. In choosing for God, they are choosing for life, for new beginnings, for another chance. In this choice they cannot fail for in God they have a powerful friend, because my God is an awesome God!

This is just as true for those of us who were not directly hit by the hurricane. At different times in our lives we are severely challenged. Sometimes it is through illness, or financial losses. Carolyn has shared with us her own personal challenge with her ex-husband, and we have seen how destructive that has been to her life. Some have experienced problems with addictions, or have relatives who have this challenge.

If you are in this life, you have or will have challenges. You, too, have those same two choices. Choose to hear the little voice of the ego talk to you about victimhood, blame, shame, fear and guilt, or choose to hear the Voice for God speak to you of strength, unity, abundance, power, and love.

Do not wait for circumstances that prove God is in your life, because it is your claim on Him that changes the circumstances in your life. Step out on faith, walk on water. Give God all the thoughts that speak to the littleness in life, and allow Him to replace them with His thoughts. Then step back and watch the miracles take place all over your life!

As the winds die, the skies clear, the water begins to recede, the real work begins. Those who came from New Orleans have come with little more than their lives and their faith, but it is a strong foundation on which to build. Those of us who were not directly involved are also touched by their plight. We are first reminded of our own vulnerability, and this brings our fears to the surface. We too, are left with work to do as we allow our fears to be healed and begin again with a clean slate.

What do we want to build on that slate? Do we want to build the same old thing? I don?t. I want to take full advantage of this opportunity to receive many healings. I ask the Holy Spirit to come into my mind and to correct my thoughts where they do not reflect the love I was created to be. And I want to use these outward opportunities to express this love. This is my practice. This is how I make my expression of love perfect.

I ask God, ?How might I be of service? What would you have me do?? There is so much to do I hardly know where to start, but I know that it is important that I do start. In the face of the horrible destruction and the seeming impossibility of dealing with the aftermath, assimilating the homeless and finding a way to help them get back on their feet, I start to feel helpless, to feel so overwhelmed. It also brings up in me my own fears of being vulnerable. If I stay hooked into the drama of what is going on, the fear will take over and fear always brings with it blame, hate and violence. How can I get past these feelings?

I read this from an article by Rev. Sue Borg of Salt Lake City: When our focus is on helping, our minds move away from fear and anxiety to a place of peace and clarity. There is no place where love and fear can exist simultaneously, so if peace is your goal, you must find a place to share your kindness and service and then watch how things change.
 

Once again, I have reason to be grateful to this church where I am given a place to do this, and the joy of uniting with others as I do it. I am grateful that I have the chance to give my time and effort to the hurricane victims. I am also grateful that I can share my peace, my joy, my spiritual faith with them and with all others God sends to me. The thing is, I cannot share what I do not have. So I must be mindful of that inner work, as well as its expression in the outer world.

It is very easy to become drawn back into the drama of what is happening around us. But there is a place I can be where I honor the story of what is happening, and yet I don?t believe in it. This is what Jesus showed us through the loaves and fishes. He saw that the people were hungry. He honored that need by supplying food, but he did not buy into their belief in lack. He used this opportunity to teach that there is no lack. He is telling us in this story that what we need will be supplied when we are faithful to our belief in abundance through Him.

So this tells me that I am to supply a seeming need, while keeping my faith that in spite of appearances, there is plenty. It is just as much my job to remain steadfast in my belief in God?s presence, in His Love, and in His power in our lives, as it is to gather supplies, prepare food, and write checks.

This seems to be a moment by moment job. My friend said something to me that is very helpful. She suggested that I not look too far ahead; that I ask of God, ?What can I do in this moment.?  She also reminded me that this works well in maintaining my peace as I remind myself that in this single moment, I can have peace. That has become my mantra.  As I center myself in God, I am peaceful and so I have tamed the hurricane within. Now I have something of real significance to give.

I invite you to meet the challenge before us. This is what Jesus taught us to do through many stories in the New Testament. Helping each other when we are in need is at the core of Christianity. Go to the civic center and volunteer for a few hours. Come here to see how you can help. Give of your time, your money, your prayers, of the many blessings you have been given. But most of all, do not buy into or support those thoughts and words of divisiveness and fear and hate that we are beginning to hear. Be true to your faith. Be strong in your faith. Allow God to work through you.

 

© 2005, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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THERE ARE NO JUSTIFIED RESENTMENTS

I was listening to a Wayne Dyer CD yesterday and I heard something that was very helpful to me. He said that there are no justified resentments. That?s great isn?t it? There are no justified resentments. I love that it is so clear. It doesn?t say there are almost no justified resentments. It doesn?t say that most resentments are not justified, just that there are no justified resentments.

If I accept that statement as true, then letting go of resentments becomes much easier. I don?t have to decide which resentments to let go of. I don?t have to decide which resentments deserve my attention because they are just so justified. I simply accept that none of them are justified, and go from there. And why would I accept that statement as true?

I accept it as true because I want to be happy. If I have even one resentment in my life, I have given up my peace. I have placed my happiness in someone else?s hands. I have said that my happiness and my peace are up to you. If you will just apologize or act differently, if the world will just modify itself to accommodate me, then I can be happy. Well, good luck with that!

If, on the other hand, I am willing to take full responsibility for how my life is at this moment, then I can have peace; I can be happy. It is all in my own hands as soon as I acknowledge that there are no justified resentments.

The only problem with this is that I want to argue that there are a few of my resentments that seem justified. I mean, that person really did something bad to me. He did it on purpose and ruined my life. Actually, once I get to thinking about it, my whole life is just a string of justified resentments. Well, ok, there a few resentments that become a stretch as I try to justify them, but the rest are certainly justified.

That?s the problem when I try to justify any one of them, the rest ride in on its coat tail. And the simple truth is, no matter what anyone did to me, or said to me, or how the world treated me, it is entirely up to me what I do with that. I can bemoan what happened and feel sorry for myself. I can continue to allow it to poison me for the rest of my life. Or, I can accept that the world does what it does, and how I feel about it or choose to see it, is the only reality it has for me.

I can recognize that what this person standing in front of me says is not the cause of my unhappiness. I am not angry because of what he said. I am angry because of how I chose to experience what he had to say. In this way, I am entirely responsible for my life. I am free at any moment to change my mind about how I feel about what happens to me. It is that simple.

While it is that simple, it isn?t always that easy, I grant you that. I have a death grip on some of my resentments. I can?t let them go because I don?t want to. I would prefer to be right than happy. It is insane to think that keeping you in the prison of my blame is going to make me happy or do anything good for me, but there you are. I do it all the time.

Since I made the decision to be happy I have been systematically releasing resentments. As each one comes up, I let it go. I give it to God and I ask Him for another way to see it. No one is prying it from my clenched fist; I am choosing to open up and let it fall away. I tell you; such a weight is lifted from my shoulders when I do this.

Sometimes, though, I will hide a resentment from myself. I?m not exactly lying when I say there are no more resentments. It is more like I am just withholding the truth. If I never think about them, then they can?t really hurt me, right? Wrong. I was reading Conscious Loving by Gay and Kathlyn Hendricks. These two psychologists say that withholding is a form of lying and that, physically, it can show up in several ways.

? Tight throat
? Clenched jaw
? Headaches at the temples or back of the neck
? Held or shallow breath
? Tension areas between shoulder blades or in the forearms
? Fluttering sensations in the stomach
? Evasive eye contact

I mention these symptoms because the other day I got a chance to experience them all. I didn?t realize what was going on at the time, but when I read this book I was amazed at how accurate they were.

Mary had invited me to the AA convention in Beaumont and I agreed to go. At the time I agreed, I felt a slight flutter in my stomach, but put it down to concern that I would have to cancel appointments and free up an entire day to accommodate this plan. By the time I got everything all arranged and arrived in Beaumont, I was fine with it, and was wondering what it would be like.

Well, when I went in I immediately realized I was way out of my comfort zone. As I started walking through all the people there, I felt myself closing off, putting up my shields. I knew this was crazy, but I couldn?t seem to help how I was feeling. I kept trying to see it differently, and just got more and more uncomfortable.

This really made no sense. Why was I feeling so threatened? I tried to think it out and couldn?t. There was a speaker for Al-Anon and I thought that this would be interesting to me. I grew up with an alcoholic father and have several relatives and many friends who are alcoholics and drug addicts. Even so, I have never been interested in going to Al-Anon, and had never attended a meeting.

If I had been really truthful with myself, I would have realized that it was more than a casual disregard that kept me from joining this group at some point. Well, we listened to a really nice lady who spoke very honestly about her experience as a wife of an alcoholic. She has been his wife for a very long time, and though it was a difficult marriage for much of that time, she loves her husband, and is very happy.

Those are the facts of what I heard, but my reaction indicated I was hearing something different. The more she spoke, the angrier I became. I didn?t know why. I just knew that I felt such resentment toward her, and now that I thought about it, I felt resentment toward the rest of the people in the room. What was going on? I was feeling all of those symptoms I told you about.

I couldn?t figure it out and I couldn?t really think about it. I was so busy keeping a tight control over my emotions that I couldn?t really think clearly. I just knew that I was going to have to look at this when I got home and could think again. I asked the Holy Spirit to look at it with me-later.

Well, later stretched on awhile. I kept myself pretty busy for awhile, but finally I couldn?t take the loss of peace any longer. I sat still and meditated. When I felt calmer, I asked the Holy Spirit to look at it with me and to help me see this differently. I took it a step at a time, and allowed myself to look closely at what happened, and to experience my feelings fully.

This is when I got a glimpse of some of those unconscious, deeply buried resentments. I remembered that I felt discomfort from the first moment I encountered the attendees in the halls. Why should I feel discomfort around people I don?t even know? The Holy Spirit helped me to see that I wasn?t seeing those people-I was seeing my fears. It was as if there were hundreds of people representing my fears rushing at me all at once. No wonder I was feeling overwhelmed.

Immediately, I got a picture of my father in my mind. Oh my, I thought I was through with that. I thought my dad was all dealt with and put away. I knew in that moment, I had been withholding the truth from myself. I felt such rage toward him. And the resentment I felt toward the people in the Al-Anon group, what was that all about?

The Holy Spirit helped me to see that they were bringing up for me the un-forgiveness that I was hiding from myself. That woman had forgiven and was happy. There was a part of my mind that was outraged that she had forgiven. Her story proved that she was fully justified in her resentments, and yet she had chosen forgiveness instead. Seeing this, I had to look at my own un-forgiveness toward my dad and also toward my ex husband, and what it was doing to me.

Ok, I thought I had fully forgiven these people, but I will just do it now. There, that?s done. Then I would see the face of the speaker in my mind, and it was like I put up my hand and said, ?Stop.? All the anger and hostility would rise up in me again. I tell you, I was really having issues with that poor woman! Every time I thought about her, I got mad.

I didn?t know what to do. This was just so disheartening. You think you have worked through something, and there it is all over again. I just couldn?t seem to get past my anger. I said, ?Holy Spirit, I just can?t do this. What am I going to do?? And the thought that came very clearly in that moment was, ?But you are not alone. I am with you.? I felt such a deep sense of relief flow over me.

I said, ?OK. I don?t know how to forgive this, but I am willing. What do I do?? He said to me, ?Nothing. You have already done your part. I will do the rest.? I just stood there and cried. I felt such peace.

After this, I saw that this had nothing to do with anything that happened outside of me. It had nothing to do with the convention, or the people there. I was no longer angry at that nice Al-Anon lady. I saw that it didn?t even have to do with my dad. My mom and dad came here to work on their forgiveness lessons, and that is what they were doing. I joined them so that I could work on my own. Why on earth would I resent them for providing the very circumstances that allowed me to do the work I had chosen to do?

I told my dad that I love him and that I appreciate him. I also appreciate that, all these many years after he died, he is still providing me with an opportunity to practice forgiveness, and to love unconditionally.

If I told you all the stories about my life living with an alcoholic father, and then with an alcoholic husband, I might convince you that my resentments are justified, but I don?t want to be justified. I don?t want to be right. I want to be happy. I want peace and joy. The world is just chock full of teachers, people who help me to see my own buried resentments, and so give me the chance to heal. I feel only gratitude toward them.

© 2005, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
You may freely share copies of this with your friends, provided this notice is included.

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