Together, We Light the Way

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A Christmas Story

One year at Christmas I had no gifts for my kids. My husband had hurt
himself in an oilrig accident and was out of work. We were dead
broke. This is before I began the study of the Course. I had been
reading a book from a Unity church and it talked about making a
treasure map when you needed or wanted something.

The idea was to put pictures and words onto a poster that would
remind me what I wanted, and to then look at the poster frequently to
think those things into existence with the power of the mind. I told
my husband what I was going to do. My kids wanted bikes and, while he
was not against the treasure map, he could not imagine how we would
get them. As broke as we were they may as well have asked for the
moon.

I totally believed in the process, though, and so I made my treasure
map and began to focus on it. In a day or two I was inspired with an
idea. I put a little add in the local paper saying that Santa needed
a little help this year because of unemployment. If anyone had used
bikes that could be fixed up he would be grateful to get them.

In the next couple of days we were flooded with offers to help. One
kind man called to say that his wife would meet me at Sears and I
could pick out bikes for the kids. I was overwhelmed with the offers
and it turned out to be a wonderful Christmas, not just for my kids,
but for me as well. I recieved confirmation that the mind is indeed
very powerful.

This was like a beginning step on my path to the Course. I had been
opening my mind to the idea there was more to life than meets the
eye, and now for the first time, I was part of something I could not
explain through my past experience. I had other extraordinary
experiences with treasure mapping. Now I treasure map with the Holy
Spirit. I have learned that I have no idea what would make me happy
so I ask the Holy Spirit to tell me what I want. This saves a lot of
time as I don’t have to make all those endless choices only to
discover that the world doesn’t offer me anything of value anyway.

This Single Quiet Thought is very much like my process:

The heart is desire.
The true Heart
is true desire.
There is only one true Heart.

Focus on the true Heart today.
Ask it to tell you
what you truly want.

Listen intently
to the answer it gives.
It speaks to you
of your truest desire,
the one that out shines
everything else
you think you want.

www.reginadawnakers.com

This is the process I use. I ask the Holy Spirit (or my true Heart)
what it is that I want and then I listen intently. I think I want
things. I think I want my house to be finished so I can move in. I
think I want my son to find a new job. I think I want more time for
writing and teaching. At one time I would have put those things on my
map and then I would have recieved them. Then I would have discovered
that some of them were pretty neat to recieve, and some I wish I had
not received. But what is most true is that I had thought that
receiving them would make me happy and then discovered that I only
wanted more things, because nothing outside me makes me happy.

I know this is true because I have had lifetimes to discover it is
true. Now when I think I want my house to be finished, I give this
thought to the Holy Spirit and ask Him what I really want. He reminds
me that I want to awaken. I tell him that I think that if my son gets
a new job I will be so relieved and so happy. Then I ask him what I
really want and he reminds me that I want to awaken.

If there is something in the world that I do actually need, I leave
that to Him as well. I truly do not know what I need. I tell Him of
my percieved need, and I do not suggest ways that need might be
filled. I wait for His inspiration. I wait in anticipation to see how
it might be met. There is no stress or strain; there are no
disappointments because there are no expectations. It is a light and
happy thing to recognize I do not know, but there is One who does.

© 2008, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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NTI Matthew 16 Peter as Symbol of Faith

Matthew 16:21-23 Peter is the symbol of faith within the unhealed mind, and so Per is also the symbol of the unhealed mind that has faith. In Peter you see great faith! And in Peter, you will see doubt, fear and confusion.

This is very meaningful to me because I relate to Peter so completely. As the next line says, I am Peter. I have great faith, and sometimes even amaze myself with my faith. And yet, I am often doubtful, fearful and confused. I have been confounded by this behavior, not understanding why I seem to rise to such heights only to fail miserably in the next moment. Then I read this passage from Matthew and I feel like laughing. Of course I will sometimes feel confused; I am an unhealed mind. Whew!

Another thing that makes me laugh is that I feel such relief when I finally understand what needs to be done in a situation, and it is always the same solution. As it says in Matthew, “It is doubt, fear and confusion you must let go of….”  It always goes back to noticing my thoughts, looking at them with the Holy Spirit, and allowing my mind to be healed. Letting go of a thought is not hard; I just decide for it and it is done. It is getting to the point that I want to let it go that feels very hard sometimes.

There is a person in my life that I don’t like. This has been making me crazy because I can’t seem to release this grievance. I cannot even figure out why I have a grievance. It came to me yesterday to share this problem with a friend of mine and to ask if she had any thoughts on it. I thought this was my idea, my choice as to who I would speak to, and done for my own reasons. (Ha ha ha. I am so funny.) After we emailed each other a few times I realized that asking this particular person was a divinely inspired decision.  As we communicated, I found out that she had nearly the same problem as I did, and in helping me she was helping herself. That Holy Spirit. 😊

As I wrote to my friend I realized that I felt very guilty for not forgiving this person, and I also felt shamed that I was unable to release the grievance. She helped me to see this, and to realize that my only job is to forgive myself. She pointed out for me that I was thinking my failure to accept a solution to this problem proved that I was not good enough and that something was wrong with me. She was so right! I felt the truth of that in my gut when I read the words.

When I wrote the email that confessed to this “sin” of maybe feeling like a failure the unexpected emotion that came up was very strong and I began to cry. Still, I hid from myself the truth and couldn’t see why I felt that way. Then when I read her words it was so obvious. In trying to like this person I was saying there is something wrong with her and that is why I have to “try” to like her.

In feeling bad because I couldn’t seem to like her I was saying there was something wrong with me. I also felt intense resentment of her because I have projected all of this onto her. This tells me I believe I wouldn’t have this problem if she had not shown up. Typically, the ego is projecting my stuff onto the world and I am feeling like a victim. I thanked her for nudging me to this. I was tired of sitting in this self condemnation.

She also helped me to see that I was looking in a mirror and saying to myself, “I do not like what I see. I had that thought at one time, but I allowed my mind to veer off into the “why” of it and I got distracted from what matters. I forgive myself for all of that. I gladly and without reservation forgive myself. I do it for Myron and, in extension, for the Sonship. Now my tears are tears of gratitude. And if I experience dislike for that woman again, I will forgive myself again, and be grateful for opportunity.

This experience was a really good illustration for me of this passage in Matthew. I could see myself as Peter with all the doubt, fear and confusion around this situation. And yet, even though this has been an ongoing problem for some time now I stuck with it, determined to find the solution and return my mind to peace. That takes great faith. I also saw myself following guidance and listening with my heart when Holy Spirit spoke to me through my friend. That took great faith, too.

© 2008, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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Accepting with Enthusiasm

I was thinking that I am solely responsible for my life and that my thoughts are the cause of all I experience. Then I wondered what I would like to experience differently and what thoughts I would change to see this happen. I had just written a blog and my thought was I wish I had more time to write. This led to the thought that I wish I had more time for teaching and counseling. So I started thinking which thoughts have created this situation where I spend most of my time at work rather than doing what I would rather do. But then I stopped because somehow this did not feel right.

I remembered that I don’t know what is best for me, or what will make me happy. So I asked Holy Spirit what I should ask for. The answer I got from Him is to ask for acceptance. He said to ask, in each situation, “for acceptance with enthusiasm and without judgment.” I knew I had heard right because it felt good to think of this. I thought about this idea for awhile and I really began to warm up to it. I notice that He did not say “accept going to work today with reluctance”, or “accept this situation with a sigh of resignation.” Ha ha ha. He said “accept with enthusiasm!”

I must have fully embraced His words because I felt immediately happy at the thought. I really did feel enthusiastic about getting to work. I wondered how I would use this during the day and how my customers would react to my enthusiasm. I was really looking forward to this day.
One of the things that happened during the day was that I had to visit a customer I have a grievance against.  At first I didn’t notice anything different about this visit. I just did what I needed to do, but then I noticed I was no longer happy. I didn’t really want to be there. I also noticed how I was using the business of the work to obscure my true purpose. I was so busy getting things done that I barely noticed the grievance. If I had not begun the day with a firm intention to accept with enthusiasm what came my way, I would have missed this forgiveness opportunity.

Once I allowed the grievance into my awareness I realized what caught my attention. The grievance was draining my enthusiasm. So as I spoke to him I started this little background program going in my mind. I asked, “What would he look like if I saw him as the Christ?” I kept that program going while we got on with our business. I wish I could say that he began to glow with the light that he is, but I never seem to have those kinds of neat mystical experiences, but what did happen is that I regained my enthusiasm for the task at hand. I felt the grievance melt away and I was happy to be just where I was.

As the day began to wind down and I got closer to home, I began to wonder how much work had been done on my house while I was gone.  I am living with my daughter while a house is being prepared for me. It has been an extended project and has gone on for much longer than expected. My daughter and grandchildren are easy to live with and it is very comfortable in their home, but as the house gets closer to being finished I have started wishing I could be in it. This time as I noticed this desire I stopped myself and thought about it. What would happen if I set aside this longing to be someplace else, and just accepted with enthusiasm the fact that I am going to be living with my daughter today? As I did this I noticed how happy I was.

I realized that wishing for things to be different than they are was keeping me from experiencing the joy of sharing my time with my grandchildren. They are such neat kids, and it is a very fortunate thing that I have had this time with my grandson as he is nearly grown now, and this opportunity won’t happen again. My granddaughter is nearly three and such a loving and fun child.

Since I have been living with my daughter I have gotten to know her better than I ever would have. I know her as an adult and mother rather than as my daughter. I think of her as a friend now and a fellow soul on the journey home. This would never have happened if I had not lived with her. Why would I want to rob myself of the joy of being with this truly delightful family by choosing to be restless and dissatisfied? By the time I got home my enthusiasm had been restored and I enjoyed the evening with my family.

I’m really looking forward to today. I am going spend this day watching my mind for signs of discontent, and gladly, enthusiastically, choose acceptance instead.

© 2008, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
You may freely share copies of this with your friends, provided this notice is included.

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