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Study of Manual for Teachers7-17-12

7-17-12
3 And so they need an illusion of help because they are helpless; a Thought of peace because they are in conflict. God knows what His Son needs before he asks. He is not at all concerned with form, but having given the content it is His Will that it be understood. And that suffices. The form adapts itself to need; the content is unchanging, as eternal as its Creator.

I love this paragraph so much. God knows what I need before I ask and He knows that my neediness may not be helped with the ultimate simple truth. It may be that I perceive a need that requires an answer that seems to meet that need. The content, the love and truth, do not change, but the form it takes will be the form that is most helpful at the time.

God has given His Son everything, but in his confusion he does not remember this and so he thinks he has needs. He thinks he is helpless and so that is where God meets him, and gives him help. Our help comes as the Holy Spirit, One Who knows both the truth and the illusion, and is the bridge from one to the other.

I model my service on the same principle. I see the perceived problem someone has and I also see that it cannot be true. But would it be helpful to state the obvious? Maybe not. Sometimes when I am confused, I need a path out of my confusion. I need to back-track, and take it a step at a time. Always the story we think we are in and the solution we think we need are just illusions, but maybe that is where I need to start. If it is where I believe I am, then certainly that is where I need to start. Knowing this about myself, I know it can be true for others as well.

How do I know what to say to anyone? How do I know where they are in their confusion, and what would help them gain clarity and vision? I, on my own, cannot know, but the One Who put us together knows, and if I am willing to step back and allow that One to communicate through me, then we are both brought to a new clarity as our minds are healed.

It is such an elegant plan the Holy Spirit has. So many times I have had to laugh as the one he brings to me for an answer has the same question I have been struggling with. Through my willingness to be helpful and my willingness to become empty to allow His words to flow through me, I get the answer along with the one who asked.

If I can ask for an answer from Holy Spirit and receive it, why can’t everyone ask their own questions of Him rather than going to someone else for help? They can. But sometimes they don’t know it yet, and so God meets them in that place by sending them to His teachers. Sometimes they know they can get an answer simply by asking the Holy Spirit for help, but they are blocked by their own confused thoughts, and so God meets them there where they believe they are and provides the answer through some other means, a teacher or a book or in whatever way it seems to be helpful.

Sometimes when I have asked for help, I have received reassurance and comfort. I have been told to be patient and wait for the answer. I have been given the first step which then led to the next. Spirit has been very gentle. I had so much fear when I began this path that it was only with very small, hesitant steps that I could walk it.

As the fear gradually began to wane with the healing of my mind, my steps became more confident and sure, and the Holy Spirit’s answers more direct. But no matter what form the answer takes, the content is always Love and always leads to more healing. The pace when set by the Holy Spirit is always perfect for that healing without engendering more fear. This is why He should always be in charge, because only He knows what that pace should be for each individual.

Another thought:
The only time I fail to be helpful when working with someone else is when I start to think I know what the outcome should be and how they should get there. This happens when the spiritual ego takes over and sometimes it can be subtle and sneak up on me. But every time that has happened I have had the feeling that something is wrong. The Holy Spirit would tap me on the shoulder. Sometimes I would be so impressed with my own words I would ignore the tap. Sigh. But that was part of my lesson and noticing this with a willingness not to do it anymore has helped me to recognize the ego more quickly and to turn from it more gladly.

© 2012, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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Study of Manual for Teachers 7-16-12

7-16-12
2 Forgiveness might be called a kind of happy fiction; a way in which the unknowing can bridge the gap between their perception and the truth. They cannot go directly from perception to knowledge because they do not think it is their will to do so. This makes God appear to be an enemy instead of what He really is. And it is just this insane perception that makes them unwilling merely to rise up and to return to Him in peace.

We are confused, and in our confusion we have latched onto the idea that we are guilty for our confusion. It is guilt that keeps us bound to the world. It is guilt that causes the fear of God that makes us unwilling to go from perception to knowledge. And so, we are given a bridge to make it possible for us to cross. We have “a kind of happy fiction” that we are calling forgiveness, as a way to appease the guilt and allay the fear that makes us see God as an enemy. 

Though neither miracles nor forgiveness are real, they are necessary. They are the way out of the dream. Over and over I applied forgiveness to the many elements of my dream and watched the miracle occur as anger turned to peace, hatred dissolved into love, as all manner of misperception was unraveled right before my eyes to reveal the truth.

It sometimes seemed as if I dug in my heals and had to be dragged to the next miracle because I was sure that what happened, though amazing, was a rare trick, perhaps never again to be repeated. Then when it finally became obvious that this was possible, I could not believe it could be that simple.

My ego self kept insisting that surely there was more to do than just see that there is actually nothing to forgive, and even if this is so, surely there must be something more for me to do to make the miracle of transformation happen. It could not abide to see itself so unnecessary to the process. I accepted its many delays and distractions as inevitable and while I had gone too far to stop the process, I delayed it as long as I could.

In delaying the return to God, I was also protracting the painful separation from God, but fear and guilt are powerful blocks and hard to move past, but they depend on my belief for their very existence. The Holy Spirit was given to us to save us from our beliefs. He knows the truth and yet looks on our illusion as well. Because of His unique function He is able to help us bridge the gap. He sees the problem and the solution and He communicates both to us.

I notice that I feel angry or fearful, I see a judgmental thought in my mind, I feel like a victim, whatever form the guilt is taking, I show it to the Holy Spirit and He shows me the problem and provides the solution. Over and over I go through this process, and with infinite patience and gentleness, He leads me from guilt to forgiveness to truth.

This continues until finally I realize that I no longer really believe that I am guilty. I no longer really believe that anyone else is guilty. Since guilt is the glue that holds the illusion together, and since guilt depends on my belief, and I am withdrawing my belief, the miracle of transformation occurs. The illusion dissolves to show me what it had been concealing.

And even in the face of all this, I hesitate and need to be reassured that it could be that simple. Really? To take the next step I just accept that what I know is true, and it is done? I need an angel to talk me over and so of course that illusion is provided as well. And so everything looks the same, but everything has changed.

© 2012, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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Study of Manual for Teachers 7-15-12

7-14-12
4. FORGIVENESS - THE FACE OF CHRIST

1 Forgiveness is for God and toward God but not of Him. It is impossible to think of anything He created that could need forgiveness. Forgiveness, then, is an illusion, but because of its purpose, which is the Holy Spirit’s, it has one difference. Unlike all other illusions it leads away from error and not towards it.

It seems that forgiveness, like the miracle is an illusion, but it is an illusion that leads away from illusions. It took me a very long time to understand forgiveness as the Course teaches it. My mind kept going back to forgiveness as I have always understood it. This meant I had to first see that someone or something was wrong, and then try to forgive it. It was an endless cycle of going nowhere. Finally, in frustration, every time I said forgiveness, I reinterpreted it to mean undo.

Finally I see that I had no problem understanding the word or the new definition, I simply didn’t want to accept it. Now that I want forgiveness for myself and for everyone else, I can’t imagine returning to forgiveness to destroy. When I do have that desire to see someone as guilty and me as the benevolent dispenser of forgiveness, I laugh at the idea because it’s so silly. That’s the thing about the ego and all it tries to do, its just silly. It only seems awful when I believe it.

My friend, Barbara, wrote something that helped me tremendously. She said that it is our mind’s job to bring us disturbing thoughts. As soon as I read this, I shifted in my understanding. This is how it works. I notice a thought that my friend promised to be here and didn’t show up and that was just plain rude. Then the story grows as more thoughts appear. I am a busy person, and I made a place for her in my schedule. She may as well have said that I am not very important to her, that she has no respect for me. The ego will continue to add to the story as long as I am interested.

If I believe what my mind tells me I will begin to feel angry at my friend. I will start to doubt my own worth. I will become depressed. I will hate the way I feel, and will decide this, too, is the work of my friend and will resent her for that. I will either have to change my friend, or get rid of her.

I can call her and explain how much she has hurt me and how she should never do that again. As long as she understands her culpability, I will be willing to forgive her and give her another chance. If I don’t think I should be the one to do all the work, or if she doesn’t see reason I am left with the only other option, which is to get rid of her as a friend so she can’t hurt me anymore.

Or I can forgive her. I can recognize that the ego is just, once again, doing its job and bringing me disturbing thoughts. I can return my mind to sanity as I realize that nothing God created could ever need forgiveness. I realize that the only thing that happened is that my friend didn’t show up.  Everything else was just a thought in the mind to which I gave meaning. I can just watch the parade of thoughts as they pass me by. They cannot disturb me unless I engage them. Forgiveness is such a simple and perfect solution.

© 2012, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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Study of Manual for Teachers 7-14-12

7-14-12
10 The miracle forgives; the ego damns. Neither need be defined except by this. Yet could a definition be more sure, or more in line with what salvation is? Problem and answer lie together here, and having met at last the choice is clear. Who chooses hell when it is recognized? And who would not go on a little while when it is given him to understand the way is short and Heaven is his goal?

I was at a wedding rehearsal last night. I had never met anyone there before I arrived. The couple had another minister lined up and he cancelled at the last minute, which is why I was in this situation. At any other time in my life I would have been very uncomfortable. I have never understood the rules of socialization.

I never knew what to say to people I don’t know, how to get a conversation started, and always imagined I was the only one who felt like this. This would make me feel less than, and in my uncertainty and discomfort I would begin to compare and project because this is what the ego mind does.

But a lovely thing happened on my way to awakening. I stopped caring about the “rules” of social behavior, about how I appear to others, about how I compare to other people. I stopped caring about myself. I stopped needing to fill the conversational void. I began to be interested in everyone else, but with no need for them to respond.

The groom’s parents are Pentacostal and the bride’s parents are Catholic. In the past, that alone would have made me uncomfortable because their religious beliefs preclude women as ministers. I would have felt judged and would have responded defensively, even if it were only in my mind. All this judgment and defense would have left me nervous and wishing I was someplace else.

When I noticed all this last night I saw these thoughts go through my mind, but since I didn’t invite them to stay, I saw everything through a different filter. It’s hard to explain in words, but I just found that I liked everyone. I noticed all sorts of delightful things about them. I wondered how the parents felt about the wedding being outside their respective churches and if there was tension between the parents since they did not socialize at all. But I did not pick up any of it because I only noticed and did not judge it.

The ego condemns. It sees everyone as a potential enemy, and is constantly on the defense.  The miracle forgives. It sees only Christ everywhere it looks and so has no need to defend, and without a need to defend, there is no attack.

If I had seen the parents as my enemy, judging me and wishing I were someone else, I would have been defensive, and in my mind, at least, I would have attacked them as being judgmental and harsh (which is exactly what I would have been doing to them) and this would have influenced my behavior with them. Everyone would have sensed this undercurrent and the experience would have been very different.

Through the miracle of forgiveness, none of this happened. I enjoyed them, and I was not the least uncomfortable. I noticed some of those old thoughts, as I said, but I didn’t believe them and so I did nothing to hold them in my mind, and they passed through without lingering. I am grateful for the miracle and grateful to Jesus for teaching me.

© 2012, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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Study of Manual for Teachers 7-13-12

7-13-12
9 Your questions have no answer, being made to still God’s Voice, Which asks of everyone one question only: “Are you ready yet to help Me save the world”? Ask this instead of what the ego is, and you will see a sudden brightness cover up the world the ego made. No miracle is now withheld from anyone. The world is saved from what you thought it was. And what it is, is wholly uncondemned and wholly pure.

A Course in Miracles has helped me to understand that I have two voices, two choices. One of those is the ego, and the Course helps me to understand how the ego works and how to recognize it. The Course also helps me to see that I don’t want to listen to the ego voice. It tells me that I can look with the Holy Spirit at the effects of believing what the ego tells me, and I can allow the Holy Spirit to correct each wrong-minded belief. All of this is for the purpose of undoing what I have made, which is my part in the salvation of the world.

But it is also telling me that I don’t need a definition for the ego. I don’t need to know what it is or where it came from. I don’t need to know why it was ever made. All of these questions assume the reality of the ego and provide more distractions from my real work, which is to learn to listen to the other Voice.

The Holy Spirit wants our help in saving the world. The way we do this is to undo the ego beliefs through watching our mind for thoughts that express that belief and allowing Him to correct those thoughts. We do this until the truth begins to dawn upon our mind. Then it seems we continue to do it, only now we understand the purpose and we do it with much more ease and conviction because we are no longer confused. We are no longer conflicted about what we really want.

Another change that occurs at this point is that we now understand that none of this is personal. It is not about waking up the individual, though in time, that is what appears to be happening. Thoughts are not unique to the one who seems to be forming them, and in fact, that one is not forming the thoughts. That feeling is just a conceit of the ego.

In actuality we are just becoming aware of thoughts. All thoughts are recycled thoughts. These thoughts occur in the mind, and when we think we “thought” about something, we actually just noticed a thought. Understanding that the thoughts are impersonal helps us to realize we have no reason to feel guilty for them. What a relief that is!

When we ask that our minds be healed, that a certain thought be corrected, we are actually asking this on behalf of the Sonship, and the healing occurs in the Sonship. So while from the point of view of the individual it appears as a personal journey of enlightenment, it is actually the mind accepting healing for itself through this mechanism.

Perhaps you are good at multi-tasking, or have at least multi-tasked upon occasion. Well what we are doing now is multi-tasking on a scale that is inconceivable to us at this time. Imagine a mind so vast and so powerful that it thinks of billions of stories all at the same time. It watches these stories to see what happens when a certain set of beliefs are accepted as truth. It immerses itself in each story all at once. Now that is multi-tasking on steroids!

My explanation is just a story designed to help me understand and accept that nothing is as it seems, but it is a helpful story. Though I must deal with what is in front of me and let all the rest simply be, understanding that this is not really about healing Myron but about healing the Sonship, helps me detach from the story and become the observer of the story. This is much less painful than believing the story is real and that I am truly guilty and suffering for my sins.

Knowing I am not guilty for my thoughts allows me to go more deeply into mind- healing because I am no longer afraid of what I will find. Instead of believing that what I find in the mind defines me and so condemns me, I now understand that what I find is simply another belief that I am ready to bring to the Holy Spirit for healing. This understanding ends resistance to the process.

What am I saving the world from? I am saving it from my definition of what it is. I am saving it from the meaning I gave it. I am grateful to Jesus for providing, through A Course in Miracles, the understanding that this needs to be done, and that this is my function. I am grateful to the Course for teaching me how to do this.

© 2012, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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Study of Manual for Teachers7-12-12

7-13-12
8 This was the ego-all the cruel hate, the need for vengeance and the cries of pain, the fear of dying and the urge to kill, the brotherless illusion and the self that seemed alone in all the universe. This terrible mistake about yourself the miracle corrects as gently as a loving mother sings her child to rest. Is not a song like this what you would hear? Would it not answer all you thought to ask, and even make the question meaningless?

What the ego was… do we really need to look for examples in our lives? We have lived with this for eons as seen from the illusion of time. I think of who I have hated; people who have offended me, attacked me (even if it were only in my thoughts) those who didn’t agree with me and support me, people who cut me off in traffic, people I don’t know, people I love. No one avoids my rage, though I try to disguise it as annoyance, disappointment, even sadness. I try to hide it behind sick humor. I try to excuse it as natural, and deserved.

Every time I hate, I seek a likely target, and I withhold my love, attention, my care, my words. I look away, I whisper a secret wish of retribution. I gossip cruelly. My failure to communicate, that is to fully love, to join as one in my heart, is an attack against myself and I deflect it onto my body as sickness, pain, suffering and death. I express it as lack and loss and my story takes a down-turn which I blame on someone else.

And no one suffers my insults and my hatred as much as do I, for all that I project onto others is also held within, where denied, it does it’s foul work in secrecy. And what is done in the darkness cannot be healed, so it is myself I hurt truly, though it may look like the attack is directed outward. This is all only a terrible mistake, and with willingness, easily corrected. It doesn’t require anything on my part other than the honest and complete desire to be healed. The healing mechanism was put into place by God, and we know It as the Holy Spirit; our Comforter, our Guide, our Corrector, our Healer.

Yesterday was a very interesting day. I travel by car in my work, and I work outside for the most part. Yesterday it rained off and on all morning so I got wet, and although the temperature up until now has been so high that getting wet would have been a blessing, the rain brought lower temperatures and so I got chilled instead. Not to mention, I looked like a drowned rat.

Then I got completely rained out as the rain turned into thunder storms and became torrential. Everyone had to turn on their flashers just to be seen by the one driving behind them. So I didn’t get to see all my customers and will have to figure out a way to fit them into my already tight schedule. Just as I was trying to fit in one more customer, my stomach rebelled against something I ate and the rest of the day was spent driving from gas station to gas station, hoping to make it to the next public restroom in time. This went on until I got to the hotel.

My stomach was finally settling down by this time so I cautiously tried a bit of supper. No more eating gas station food for me, so I went across town to a nice restaurant and the food was really good, though it went down somewhat uncertainly. I’m driving back to the hotel on the interstate when I notice my car is pulling to one side and wonder if I am getting a flat. By the time I am able to pull off the interstate at an exit, my tire is shredded and I’m driving on the rim.

Its not a good neighborhood, but I’m in a parking lot of a medical clinic and there are people around. Thanking God for AAA, I call for help. I feel bad for whoever responds because it is still raining. Help should arrive in 30 minutes to an hour, I’m told, so I read a bit and play solitaire on my Kindle. Time slows down; cars begin to leave the lot, its getting dark outside and its still raining.

Now here is the interesting part of today. I am still content. I am at peace. I am not upset and have not been upset all day. Nothing has disturbed my peace in spite of all the circumstances that seemed to have gone wrong. I’m watching an interesting movie and wondering how it will all end. Last week if this had all happened in one day I would have been crying by now, worried and feeling sorry for myself. Looking at what is happening in my life, it seems like nothing has changed, but looking at my response to what is happening, everything has changed.

I had one iffy moment. The final car pulls up next to me and a doctor rolls down his window enough to talk. He is concerned about me being out here by myself. He says that this is a bad neighborhood and hopes I have help coming soon. He seems concerned as well that I don’t seem to be joining him in his fear. Probably thinks I am a simple-minded tourist from the country where we only worry about wild boars or alligators.

I reassure him that the wrecker should arrive any moment (surely, any moment) and with a last pitying look, and directions to the nearest hospital, he drives away. I look around and see how alone I am. I notice the clinic has a pharmacy and think how attractive a target that would be for someone looking for a fix. I checked to be sure my doors are locked. I remember action-adventure shows where the hero makes his escape on a mere rim after his tire has been shot away by the bad guy, and wonder if that only works in Hollywood.

Yikes, my peace has been ruffled. Now I have a choice. I can follow the ego’s story and see where that leads me, or I can stay with the peace of God that passes all understanding. It’s a close call there for a bit; I’ve, over eons of time, have gotten addicted to drama. I had been texting my kids off and on while I waited, and I started to text the doctor’s warnings, then stopped. Why would I do that? Do I want to wallow in fear and anxiety for a while? Do I actually miss that? Do I want my children to join me there?

I think not. The mind brings me thoughts of disaster. It always will because that is its job. I see them. I measure my belief in them by my emotional response, and when I realize that there is something to be healed, I ask for healing. Otherwise I let the thought pass on through. That’s when the apologetic wrecker guy showed up to change my tire. I drove from there to the nearest Walmart to get a new tire, but of course, by this time the tire department was closed.

I noticed the thought that the wrecker should have come within the one hour time allotted him, instead of the more than two hours it actually took and I could have gotten a new tire. But, really? He should have? Evidently not, since he didn’t. That’s reality. So I went to the hotel, and enjoyed a hot shower and a good night’s sleep.

I suppose I will always experience ego thoughts as long as I am “here” but as long as I know that “here” cannot actually exist and that I am not this body and this story, they cannot affect my peace. And when I forget, or become enamored of a dark thought, I can easily return to sanity. I have been given the key to Heaven, and it is my desire for only God. I always have only two choices; it is God, or it is ego. Today, I accept God.

© 2012, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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Study of Manual for Teachers 7-11-12

7-11-12
7 What is a miracle? A dream as well. But look at all the aspects of this dream and you will never question any more. Look at the kindly world you see extend before you as you walk in gentleness. Look at the helpers all along the way you travel, happy in the certainty of Heaven and the surety of peace. And look an instant, too, on what you left behind at last and finally passed by.

The miracle is part of the dream, but it is the corrective device given us to undo the dream. Once we are awake we won’t need miracles, because there will be nothing to undo, nothing that needs a miracle. But for now the miracle is essential. Miracles facilitate a change of mind, which of course is the only change we need. Once the mind changes, the world reflects that change. There is no point in trying to change the world to convince the mind to change because it doesn’t work that way.

However, as the mind changes the world seems to provide all the help we need to complete that change. I looks as if the right people, the right books, the perfect ideas are placed in our path so that they will be there as we need them. It reminds me of those video games my kids play. As they move deeper and deeper into the game all sorts of tools appear. The higher the level they achieve the more tools and the more powerful the tools.

This help appears as we are ready for it. It will do no good if we don’t understand that it is a tool, or that it is for us. But it will absolutely be there when we need it. All we have to do is accept it. It helps very much if we simply play the game without feeling guilt for every wrong turn. If my kids felt guilty every time they chose the wrong path or every time their character was killed and they had to start again from level 1, they would quickly stop playing the game and find something else to do. When we feel guilty about the dark thoughts in our mind, or our failure to accept healing the first time we ask, then we get discouraged from playing, too.

Fear is also a deterrent. If my kids were truly afraid at every turn in the game, if they believed the bad guy jumping from behind the bush was going to cause them real harm, they would find a friendlier game to play. If I become afraid to make a mistake or I believe there are real and painful consequences when I fail to accept my help and my miracle, I would become discouraged and maybe get stuck in place, unable to move back and afraid to move forward.

The thing that helped me with fear is the understanding that it is not real. It can’t be real because fear is not in God.  I made it up. This understanding has not completely ended fear in my mind, but it has helped tremendously and I fully expect a miracle to heal my mind completely as I am ready. In the meantime I have no guilt about the fear. That wasn’t always true, but it is now and, oh my, what a difference that makes.

I can’t believe how easy it was to step out of guilt. I kept teaching this, but failing to accept it fully for myself. But as the Manual for Teachers says, the teachers of God are not perfect, but they teach perfection over and over until they learn it. I had learned it, but failed to realize the game was over, so I needed a tool, a helper to shake me awake. Because I was ready, the helper appeared.

Now when I have a thought that says I am vulnerable, have been attacked, or am in danger of being attacked; that I am a victim to circumstances or persons; that I am lonely, afraid, in pain, or suffering in any way, I see the thought for what it is, an impersonal call for healing, and I gladly offer it to the Holy Spirit to receive that miracle on behalf of the Sonship. This is how the miracle works to undo the dream.

© 2012, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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