Together, We Light the Way

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Study of the Text 11-21-12

11-21-12
3 Darkness is lack of light as sin is lack of love. It has no unique properties of its own. It is an example of the “scarcity” belief, from which only error can proceed. Truth is always abundant. Those who perceive and acknowledge that they have everything have no needs of any kind. The purpose of the Atonement is to restore everything to you; or rather, to restore it to your awareness. You were given everything when you were created, just as everyone was.

OK, let me start at the end on this one. I was given everything. I was given everything when I was created. You were, too. Everyone was. So where did it go? Where did my sense of abundance go? Where did my sense of being loved, of being loving, of being lovable go? Where did my confidence, my certainty, go? Jesus says that it didn’t go anywhere, and that I still have it all, the peace, the love, the joy. He says that the purpose of the Atonement is to bring it all back into my awareness.

Jesus is telling me that if I acknowledge that I have everything I will have no needs of any kind and that makes perfect sense. If I really do have everything and the only thing keeping me from enjoying this wealth is my refusal to acknowledge it, then the solution to my poverty is simple. I am reminded of something I heard a long time ago and common sense of it caused it to stick.

Someone said that if I have a bank account with an endless supply of money, money that is replenished each time I use any of it, then that would be wonderful. Right? But what if I am unaware of the bank account? Technically, I am rich, but what good does it do me? No matter how rich I am, in order to benefit from my wealth I must acknowledge it.
Now that I have the solution to my sense of lack, all I need to do is use it. Lack is not an evil force keeping me from my good. It is easily overcome. As Jesus says at the beginning of this paragraph, darkness is just the lack of light. So let’s shine some light on this situation. Now that I have been assured that I already have what I want, each time I notice a thought of lack I know what to do. I deny the lack and thus shine away some darkness. I don’t need to look for abundance, it is already there waiting for me to see it. I uncover it through my willingness to see.

I keep doing this every time I see an opportunity. If I feel lonely and unloved, I remember that I have everything I need. I become willing to let go of the belief I could be unloved or even lonely. At first I don’t know what that is supposed to accomplish or how, but I am willing to suspend my doubt and accept Jesus at his word. I am willing to allow my mind to be healed and to allow the effects to unfold in my life in unexpected ways.

I can remember a few years ago when I began this process. I had the thought that I would like to have friends. I really didn’t have any. The Course was helping me come out from under the pall of years of depression. If anyone had liked me I would not have recognized it and what good is a friend if you don’t know you have one? I was so filled with unquestioned guilt that I didn’t believe I deserved love so I didn’t let myself feel it. When anyone offered me friendship or love I couldn’t believe in it and turned away from it.

As I began the process of watching my thoughts and giving what willingness I had to being corrected, the light of truth shown just enough in my mind to allow me to ask for friendship, or at least to consider it was possible to be loved. Thus my thought (and all thoughts are prayers) that I would like to have friends. First I felt the love within myself. I began to accept it for my self. I started liking myself more and I began to open to the light of love.

Eventually, as I began to acknowledge that I have love to give, I began to feel the desire to share that love. My life began to fill with people who wanted and needed what I had to give. It took longer for my sense of worth to become strong enough to allow myself to acknowledge that love bounces both ways. But eventually, I began to recognize friendship when it occurred.

Now I understand. Love is what I am. I am an ocean of love. The love flows from me and then returns in great waves which break over me covering me in love. Then it flows out again, only to return. Before I was like a lonely creature standing on the shore dripping wet, wishing for water. When it would break over me again, I would protect myself from its force and garb myself to prevent its touching me. I would wish for love but then do everything I could think of to protect myself from its touch. And wonder why I was lonely and unloved.

The simplicity of it just astounds me. I am love. I can’t be without love. I can only pretend I could lack love, and defend against it to safeguard my pretense. Love will take whatever form I feel I need. More money. More health. More peace. More joy. It is all mine because those are just different experiences of love and I am love. As I open up and more light shines away the darkness I see so clearly that I have been hiding my good from myself.

I thought I didn’t deserve it. I thought I could lose what I got, so it would be less painful to not have at all than to suffer the pain of loss. I thought I was a sinner and needed to be punished. I thought it was important to keep my holiness a secret or God would find me. Darkness prevailed, but only at my authorization. As soon as I let those thoughts be healed, light flooded my mind and I saw the truth. I am love. I am abundance of every kind. Not only do I not lack, I cannot lack.

I am learning to disbelieve all proof to the contrary, to question it and to allow my mind to be healed. As my mind is healed, the thoughts change, and the effects of my thinking naturally change as well. It looks like where there was lack there is now abundance, but that is an illusion. The truth is that where there was the belief in darkness, the belief in lack, there is now light to see that love was always there because there is nothing else.

© 2012, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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Study of the Text 11-20-12

11-20-12
2 Holiness can never be really hidden in darkness, but you can deceive yourself about it. This deception makes you fearful because you realize in your heart it is a deception, and you exert enormous efforts to establish its reality. The miracle sets reality where it belongs. Reality belongs only to spirit, and the miracle acknowledges only truth. It thus dispels illusions about yourself, and puts you in communion with yourself and God. The miracle joins in the Atonement by placing the mind in the service of the Holy Spirit. This establishes the proper function of the mind and corrects its errors, which are merely lacks of love. Your mind can be possessed by illusions, but spirit is eternally free. If a mind perceives without love, it perceives an empty shell and is unaware of the spirit within. But the Atonement restores spirit to its proper place. The mind that serves spirit is invulnerable.

2 Holiness can never be really hidden in darkness, but you can deceive yourself about it. This deception makes you fearful because you realize in your heart it is a deception, and you exert enormous efforts to establish its reality. Everyone carries a secret anxiety whether they realize it or not. It has been a part of their lives for so long that they don’t notice it on a conscious level, but it is there. It is a deeply unconscious guilt that while well hidden, nevertheless informs our daily thoughts and actions.

This unconscious guilt is the cause of the world we see. It is projected outward and appears as the circumstances in our daily life. We then look at those circumstances and think, “Yes, that’s why I feel anxious,” or “Yes, that’s why I feel guilty.” We would rather be guilty of unkind acts and betrayals, even adultery, murder, or theft, than to uncover the true cause of the fear.

We think we are hiding from God, and yet we cannot even hide from ourselves. Our holiness, no matter how we cover it with acts of brutality, war and such, or even the everyday business of distractions, making a living, making love, making children; our holiness seeps out and this scares us. Even when it doesn’t, we know in our deepest heart what we are, and we are afraid it will betray us to God. Holy Spirit, thank you for helping us remember the truth that God loves us and harbors no resentments. Thank you for reminding us that we have nothing to fear from God.

The true purpose of the miracle is to bring us to truth. It is to establish our reality once more, to bring us out of the dark and into light. We are afraid we must atone for our sins, but Jesus is giving a new definition to Atonement. Atonement is the gentle undoing of this strange and cruel choice we have made.

I picture it like this. I am a child hiding in a dark closet. I am surrounded by monsters and there are terrible things happening all around me. Better to stay here because if I come out the consequences will be even more dire. I have been here in this dark place for so long that I have gotten used to the monsters and the fear. I have learned to deal with it. I have spent many lifetimes here and now the only thing I fear worse than the monsters is leaving the dark. I don’t remember why, but I do remember it is important to stay here.

But I grow weary of the pain and suffering and I have the occasional dream of something else, something light and happy. I begin to pay attention to that thought a bit more. This thought seems to be a whispering Voice in my heart, gently coaxing me out of hiding. We have been in this conversation, this negotiation, for awhile now. It works like this.

The Voice reminds me of another life, a life of peace and freedom. I tell Him why I don’t want to take a chance on coming out of hiding. I bring Him one scary thought at a time, laying each one down before Him. He shines a light on the thought and I see it differently. It is not really a monstrous thought, but just a shadow that fades in the light. I see behind the shadow a true thought and my heart lightens a bit. I am less afraid.

This goes on for a seemingly long time, with many thoughts being brought forward, more thoughts and more quickly now because I am gaining clarity with each exchange. Each time He says, “See, you but do this to yourself. There is no real threat in this.” This is a miracle! Each healed thought is a miracle. As my thoughts are corrected, the miracle takes form and I see the connection.

The Voice is right. The monsters are not real. The monstrous circumstances are not real. The world I see is not real. I but did this to myself, after all. As I allow my mind to be corrected, all the monsters disappear. The frightening circumstances, the suffering and the pain were all simply effects of the untrue thoughts I was holding in my mind. They were the guilty thoughts taking form and now that the thoughts are changing, so is the form they take.

I see now that I am not that frightened child hiding in the dark that I once thought I was. I am not that at all. I am spirit. I am the maker of the child and the maker of the dark places, and yes, even the maker of the monsters, the unpleasant circumstances and the pleasant distractions as well. I am the maker of it all and as I allow my mind to be healed, I become the maker of happier stuff.

When the healing is complete, and when I have finally and fully accepted the Voice and It’s reassurances, I will come all the way out of the darkness and stand before my Creator. That is the final step for me to take. Then, when it will no longer frighten me, He will lift me up. He will enfold me with His Love and His care.

He will bring me into His Self and I will laugh as I realize I have been there all along. I see this. I see it just over there. Holy Spirit, please free my mind of any remaining impediments to this happy ending. I gladly look at any of the mistaken and frightening thoughts still in the mind. I gladly give them to You. I want to be free again. I am ready to lift the veil and pass through to You. Spirit, please take me to God.

© 2012, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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Study of the Text 11-19-12

11-19-12
IV. The Escape from Darkness
1 The escape from darkness involves two stages: First, the recognition that darkness cannot hide. This step usually entails fear. Second, the recognition that there is nothing you want to hide even if you could. This step brings escape from fear. When you have become willing to hide nothing, you will not only be willing to enter into communion but will also understand peace and joy.

This paragraph is a very simple instruction on how to return to God and my Reality. First, realize that I am not hiding anything with my pretense. My story of Myron and the world I made as a stage for this play is dark, indeed, but not dark enough to hide my intent. There is not enough darkness in existence to hide from Love.

The second step is to realize there is nothing to hide. There is not enough guilt in existence to condemn me. Nothing, not even the belief I turned my back on God, can condemn me. I am innocent and the innocent have nothing to hide.

The third step is to stop trying to hide anything. While I tried to hide my guilt, I must believe in it. When I believe in it I am too afraid to open my eyes to Reality. It is not my guilt that keeps me from awakening, but only my fear of looking at the guilt that imprisons me.

This plays out over and over in the average day. I gossip with a friend and I feel a prickle of anxiety that I ignore. I hide behind: I’m feeling so comfortable being one of the guys. No one is really hurt. Everyone knows this stuff anyway, it’s old news. In my denial of my Self, I deny God and the guilt builds and builds. But because I am pretending not to see the guilt, pretending to hide it from myself, I must pretend I don’t know why I feel anxious.

Someone calls and as I answer the phone I have the thought that I wish no one had called. I wish I could just have this moment of quiet for myself. I feel a prickle of anxiety for this desire that separation be true. I hide it in my righteous indignation. I’ve been working all week, teaching and counseling all weekend. I deserve some quiet time. I assign my discomfort to whoever is on the other end of the phone.  I hide my guilt in that person.

There are so many little bits of guilt and darkness and hiding. Mostly they seem insignificant, too small to take notice. And yet they are the blocks to my awareness of Love’s presence. They are the wall I hide behind, the wall I built to keep God out. How can I return to Love if I deny the wall, deny that I built it, deny that I can take it down. Jesus tells me that I must hide nothing from him. This is my way out.

There is no transgression too big or too small that I will hide from him. Each unkind thought or word is to be uncovered quickly, looked at with the Holy Spirit, and seen as meaningless. Each separation thought, each attack or defense thought, each fear thought, all of them to be looked at, not hidden. It is in looking that I am shown they are nothing, and so I am, after all, innocent and deserving of God’s Love.

© 2012, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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Study of the Text 11-16-12

11-16-12
9 Miracles are selective only in the sense that they are directed towards those who can use them for themselves. Since this makes it inevitable that they will extend them to others, a strong chain of Atonement is welded. However, this selectivity takes no account of the magnitude of the miracle itself, because the concept of size exists on a plane that is itself unreal. Since the miracle aims at restoring the awareness of reality, it would not be useful if it were bound by laws that govern the error it aims to correct.

One time I was very angry with my boyfriend. I had just discovered he was lying to me about something important to me, and to make it worse, we were at the home of a couple I barely knew with a group of his friends. I was shocked by his revelation and had no privacy in which to work it through. I certainly didn’t feel like playing volleyball with everyone else.

I noticed that the couple whose house we were visiting were not playing volley ball either. They were doing something inside, so I decided to introduce myself. At least it was quiet and peaceful in the house. I was still reeling from the betrayal and was filled with conflicting emotions so I was especially drawn to the peace.

I liked the couple and we began to have a nice visit. Somehow we got on the subject of spirituality, and I shared some on my path as a Course student. They had never heard of A Course in Miracles but were very interested and decided on the spot to get the book.  As I talked about my favorite subject I relaxed and let go of the anger I had been holding onto, and I thought how nice it would be to have someone to study with since at that time I was still very isolated in my study.

Later when I left, I marveled at how even in my anger and frustration, the Holy Spirit used me. All it took was for me to be willing to set aside my own self-interest long enough to be a vessel. In doing so, I was also giving my permission to be healed, because of course; my joy at being used so, trumped my anger and need to be right. It just snapped me right out of it.

I had no way to know that this couple was going to be the next link in the chain of Atonement, and I still don’t know how that worked out in the bigger picture, where the chain went from there, because I was to never study with them, as we went our separate ways. I also had no idea that I could be of service at a time when I was absolutely ignoring everything I learned from the Course. At that time, I still believed I had to be deserving in order to serve. 

These people were virtual strangers to me. I did not set the meeting up. I did not go into their house to proselytize. It had never occurred to me that they would be interested in A Course in Miracles. I was not prepared to talk about the Course. I was angry, confused, conflicted and unable to think straight. I certainly wasn’t feeling spiritual, or behaving in a way that fit my description of spiritual.

What I learned that day, the gift I took from that encounter was the realization that all Jesus needs from me is a moment of willingness. He doesn’t need my vision; he brings the vision. He doesn’t need a perfectly healed teacher; he heals me as I teach. I learned that day about surrender.  I was too upset and my mind too confused to make plans and try to control the situation, and that was perfect.

Certainly I would never have guessed that he needed so little from me. It took a lot longer for me to realize this is always true and to let go of the arrogance of believing he needs more. But I absolutely realized that I can see so little of the plan that it can’t be my job to know who needs the miracle, or who is ready for it, where it might most effectively be applied. I still take over in a hundred little ways but when I catch myself I easily and gladly let go of the reins. I know better now.

© 2012, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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Study of the Text 11-15-12

11-15-12
7 Miracles arise from a mind that is ready for them. By being united this mind goes out to everyone, even without the awareness of the miracle worker himself. The impersonal nature of miracles is because the Atonement itself is one, uniting all creations with their Creator. As an expression of what you truly are, the miracle places the mind in a state of grace. The mind then naturally welcomes the Host within and the stranger without. When you bring in the stranger, he becomes your brother.  8 That the miracle may have effects on your brothers that you may not recognize is not your concern. The miracle will always bless you. Miracles you are not asked to perform have not lost their value. They are still expressions of your own state of grace, but the action aspect of the miracle should be controlled by me because of my complete awareness of the whole plan. The impersonal nature of miracle-mindedness ensures your grace, but only I am in a position to know where they can be bestowed. 

This paragraph feels like a review for the most part.
1. Miracles arise from a mind that is ready for them. We become ready for them through our forgiveness work. In forgiving we allow our minds to be purified. We allow the Holy Spirit to undo all that we have done and this leaves us in our natural state of holiness. From our holiness the miracle blesses our holy brothers.
2. By being united this mind goes out to everyone, even without the awareness of the miracle worker himself. I have to admit that when I think about performing miracles I think of people I think should have them. This is absolutely not my job. My job is to allow my mind to be healed so that it can be used in the performance of miracles. Miracles are for everyone who is ready for them and will reach their target because there is only one mind. No one is special. I also do not need to know that I have done anything, or what that might look like, or to whom it would have been directed. My job is to be miracle ready and to trust.
3. The impersonal nature of miracles is because the Atonement itself is one, uniting all creations with their Creator. Through the Atonement (or the Undoing) we return to our true nature. We let go of all belief in separation and see ourselves as one Whole with each other and our Father. This Oneness is the reason miracles are impersonal. As one whole self with no separation there is also no specialness. No one person is more deserving or more needy.
4.  As an expression of what you truly are, the miracle places the mind in a state of grace. The mind then naturally welcomes the Host within and the stranger without. When you bring in the stranger, he becomes your brother. Well, ok. I love everything about this. I ask for the miracle that places my mind in a state of grace. I gladly relinquish all I thought I wanted instead. As I let go and let my mind be healed I welcome the Host ( the Holy Spirit ) and step aside so that He can do this work through me.
I also welcome the stranger. I welcome him home to the place I find myself. I welcome him to comfort and support and peace. I welcome him as my brother, and he is no longer a stranger. My friend has a daily process in which he asks the Holy Spirit to take him to God. He also brings a friend, whoever happens to be on his mind at the time. I hope he brings me sometimes, too. This is a place of miracles.
    5. That the miracle may have effects on your brothers that you may not recognize is not your concern. The miracle will always bless you. What a great arrangement. I give my mind for purification and from this healed place I welcome the Holy Spirit to bless any of my brothers with a miracle. I don’t care who is chosen or why. I don’t care how the miracle is manifested. I don’t need to see proof or care about proof. It couldn’t get any easier than this, but it just got better. Whatever is done through me is a blessing to me.

6. Miracles you are not asked to perform have not lost their value. They are still expressions of your own state of grace, but the action aspect of the miracle should be controlled by me because of my complete awareness of the whole plan. The impersonal nature of miracle-mindedness ensures your grace, but only I am in a position to know where they can be bestowed.  So now I know that I can perform miracles indiscriminately because a healed mind is in a state of grace and so naturally expresses itself as love. And I also know why it is better to allow Jesus to be in charge of the action aspect of miracles. He knows the whole plan, he knows who is ready to accept the miracle, and how one miracle links to the next. 

Another thought that occurs to me is that in allowing myself to be guided, I am reinforcing the idea in my own mind that miracles are impersonal. Actually, that everything is impersonal. I know this is true, but as I become involved in my story of Myron, I tend to forget it.

© 2012, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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Study of the Text 11-14-12

11-14-12
6 You respond to what you perceive, and as you perceive so shall you behave. The Golden Rule asks you to do unto others as you would have them do unto you. This means that the perception of both must be accurate. The Golden Rule is the rule for appropriate behavior. You cannot behave appropriately unless you perceive correctly. Since you and your neighbor are equal members of one family, as you perceive both so you will do to both. You should look out from the perception of your own holiness to the holiness of others. 

I used to wonder about the Golden Rule. Back in the day (before the Course) I would think about treating others like I treated myself and knew that could not be what Jesus had in mind. I had very low self-esteem and was depressed more than not. This led to a lot of self-destructive behavior. I didn’t think that Jesus meant for me to treat others the way I treated myself or the way I thought I should be treated.

Strangely enough it never occurred to me that I should question how I felt about myself. My behavior toward myself seemed appropriate to me because of how badly I felt about myself. I behaved badly because I didn’t think much of myself and then I used the bad behavior to prove that I wasn’t worth much. This circular thinking is very typical of the ego but at the time I didn’t know anything about that.

I did recognize that my behavior toward others was often inappropriate in that it was not kind and loving. I just didn’t know what to do about it. I tried to be a good person but often failed in my eyes to meet that goal. This just provided me with further proof that I was a bad person. At that time I didn’t know that I would perceive others in the same way I perceived myself and that I would behave according to my perceptions.

Perhaps it was my innate desire to do better with the people in my life that opened my mind just a little so that some light could get in. When I was ready, A Course in Miracles showed up in my life and I embraced it. Looking back on it I see that this full and immediate acceptance of the Course was a miracle. I didn’t think of the desire to be a better person as a prayer, but of course it was. That prayer was answered through A Course in Miracles.

My prayer was to be a better person, to treat others better, to be happier, to behave better, and eventually all of these prayers were answered. I learned that these ideals were not the ultimate goal, but were the effects of reaching that goal. As I embraced my holiness I saw that all else was given to me. Considering the state of my mind when I started, the very idea that I could see myself as holy, the miracle of it all, is absolutely amazing.

The Golden Rule says that whatever I wish others would do to me, that is what I should do to them. If my mind is centered on ego I will think very little of myself and will think I deserve very little from others. What I think is what I experience so I will be as badly treated as I think I deserve. Being badly treated, I will both defend through attack and so treat others badly, and will at the same time have my original premise reinforced.

If I am badly treated I believe I must deserve that treatment. When it becomes overwhelming I project it outward onto others. I see them as the cause of my misery completely forgetting that the whole cycle began with me. Now that we are back to me, let’s look at the way to break the cycle. As we go back to the central idea from yesterday we find our answer.

Spirit is in a state of grace forever.
Your reality is only spirit.
Therefore you are in a state of grace forever.<strong></strong>

I am in a state of grace forever. I am very holy. Just as from a perspective of unworthiness I saw proof of unworthiness everywhere I looked, from this new perspective of holiness, I look out at the world and see holiness. The miracle is not that everyone suddenly became holy, but that I suddenly recognized my own holiness and so was able to recognize the holiness of everyone else. Could it have always been that simple? Apparently so.

The ego is constantly waging a war against my holiness, trying to convince me otherwise and pull me back to the dark side, but I am not interested, or at least I am not convinced. I do respond to the seeming proof of my guilt from time to time, but I don’t believe it anymore so it can’t hold my attention for long.

The more certain I am of my holiness, the more certain I am of yours. Would I ever consider treating your holy self badly? Would I consider treating my holy self badly? Absolutely not! So if my behavior is not appropriate to our state of holiness, then I must have slipped back into the ego briefly and am temporarily confused about our identities, so don’t take it personally. It is obviously not about you, but about me. You haven’t changed. You are holy now and forever. I just forgot, for the moment, who I was. ~smile~

© 2012, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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Study of the Text 11-13-12

11-13-12
Continued from yesterday

5 Error cannot really threaten truth, which can always withstand it. Only the error is actually vulnerable. You are free to establish your kingdom where you see fit, but the right choice is inevitable if you remember this:

Spirit is in a state of grace forever.
Your reality is only spirit.
Therefore you are in a state of grace forever.

Atonement undoes all errors in this respect, and thus uproots the source of fear. Whenever you experience God’s reassurances as threat, it is always because you are defending misplaced or misdirected loyalty. When you project this to others you imprison them, but only to the extent to which you reinforce errors they have already made. This makes them vulnerable to the distortions of others, since their own perception of themselves is distorted. The miracle worker can only bless them, and this undoes their distortions and frees them from prison. 

How does the Atonement help us? It undoes all errors in the mind through uprooting the source of fear. It does this by healing the mind of the belief that something we have done has caused our nature to change, the result being that our innocence is lost. Through the healing of the mind we realize that there is no guilt in us because we are Spirit and in a state of grace forever.

Jesus talks to us about experiencing God’s reassurances as a threat and for a moment I was confused. I could not see how I do this, but I see that when I resist the truth it is because I see the reassurance of it as something to be avoided even though I may not admit that to myself. It is obvious to me that I still refuse to believe in my complete innocence.

I often think I am guilty. I have gotten really good at not seeing that in myself most of the time, but it is still there. If I were free of guilt I would no longer experience fear and would be completely and permanently awakened. What God says about me seems very reassuring. It seems wonderful and miraculous. I am innocent. No matter what I do, I am never guilty.

How wonderful to know that I am not stained by my errors, and that I remain as God created me. And yet, I feel stained. I feel like I am guilty. There are still some things I have done in my life that bring a flush of shame when I think of them. If I am innocent and nothing I did has meaning, why should I feel ashamed?

And why would I not be thrilled to be wiped clean of that shame? Jesus says it is because I am defending misplaced or misdirected loyalty. What do you mean by that, Jesus?

Jesus: Dear one, there are only two places for you to place your loyalty; God or ego. If you are not siding with God you are siding with your alternative to God, the ego. Let us look at one of your favorite ways to feel guilty. You failed (in your eyes) to be supportive of your mother when she had Alzheimer’s. God said that you are not guilty for anything you did or failed to do.

You find it hard to support that truth. In an effort to appear to accept God’s decision you try to think of excuses for your behavior. You try to see your behavior in a different light. You try to find reasons that your behavior was acceptable. But these are all defenses against God. If you fully accepted God’s word you would not need any of these reasons to be innocent. That you need reasons to see your innocence proves that you feel that you are guilty.

When you didn’t know how to help your mom and when you didn’t know how best to love her, and when you failed to visit and made excuses to stay away, you felt very guilty. God declared you innocent, but you constantly defended against your innocence. You clung to your guilt, remaining loyal to it to the bitter end. With each gentle reminder of your innocence, you stacked up your proof that you were a bad daughter and guilty, guilty, guilty.

What you could not let yourself see is that you were, all this time, defending yourself against God. Your loyalty was misplaced as you defended your right to be guilty and live in fear and shame. This circular thinking is typical of the ego. The ego said you were guilty for your behavior and should feel bad about it. God said you were innocent, but the ego said you could not accept that declaration because you were too guilty and didn’t deserve forgiveness.

The only way out of this cycle is to simply step out. Step out on faith. Step out because you do have another choice and you can simply make that choice. You don’t have to do anything to deserve it; you don’t have to do anything to atone for your sin. I am the Atonement and it is done. Yes, my dear one, it is really that simple. Lay down your defenses. Ignore everything except the truth. 

What is the alternative? You continue living that bitter life you made in place of the glory that is yours and will always be yours. You will become so miserable and afraid of your thoughts that you will try to sling them away from you and put them on others, as if there were someplace that is outside your own mind where they could be instead. This projection will add to your belief you are guilty and the cycle grows and becomes more intense as you believe you have caused more harm.

You cannot convince anyone they are guilty unless they already hold that belief in their mind, but most of your brothers and sisters do believe in their guilt. Your continued belief adds to the certainty that all of you are guilty and you move more deeply into the illusion. You still are not guilty, though. More illusion is just more illusion. The illusion is meaningless. It is nothing and adding nothing to nothing is still nothing. You cannot be guilty for doing nothing.  You can, however, suffer from the belief that you have actually done something.

Another cycle you are caught in is the belief that you must first correct your errors, become a better person, if you will, then you can come to God for help because then you will deserve help and be worthy of it. People do this in a number of ways. They become very generous and helpful to their brothers even to the point of self-sacrifice. Another way they do this is to dive into spiritual study, sometimes to the exclusion of all else, not from love of the work, but from fear that less will condemn them, or from the belief that sacrifice will redeem them.

Another way these confused children of God look for salvation is through punishing themselves. They punish themselves through physical or mental pain, loss of every conceivable kind, or the denial of anything that brings joy or peace.  They punish themselves in a misguided effort to purify and become worthy. And all the while unconscious guilt increases because they think they have usurped God’s right to punish them.

There is nothing you or anyone need do to prepare yourselves for God. You are perfect right now. You are untouched by your perceived wrongs and remain as God created you. Guilt is not something to be atoned for or over come. My dear friend, it is so very simple. Take my hand and together we will turn our back on guilt. It cannot stop us. Guilt cannot hold you prisoner; only you can do that. Give me your loyalty. I will use it to save your brothers and sisters from their confusion. I will use you. This is what is needed. Accept the miracle I offer you. That is all that is left to do.

© 2012, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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