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Gentle Healing Lesson 136, Manual for Teachers, Text.  5-3-19

LESSON 136
Sickness is a defense against the truth.

“Sickness is not an accident. Like all defenses, it is an insane device for self-deception.”

“The aim of all defenses is to keep the truth from being whole. The parts are seen as if each one were whole within itself.”

“Defenses are not unintentional, nor are they made without awareness. They are secret, magic wands you wave when truth appears to threaten what you would believe.”

Jesus tells us that we choose sickness and we do know what we are doing, and that the forgetting we chose it is also a deliberate decision. We want to keep our story going, keep the laws we made to maintain the illusion and so we have established defenses against the truth and sickness is one of them. It is important that we learn to recognize these defenses for what they are so that we can make a different choice.

I saw through my defense one morning and I have never since doubted that I choose sickness and I now understand why I choose it. I was doing the lesson that morning, and it was one of the lessons that says I am not a body. Suddenly, I had a revelatory moment in which I knew this was true. I absolutely knew it. I sat there stunned at this sudden knowing.

Almost immediately before I could even think about what had just happened, I got really sick. I started throwing up and was feverish. I was living with my daughter at the time and my little granddaughter had been sick. I had the thought that I caught it from her, but also I knew enough to question that belief.

Then it hit me. I was defending myself from the truth that I am not a body. What better way to do this than to be sick? It all came together in my mind and when it did, I started laughing. So, there I was, hugging the toilet, throwing up and laughing like a loon. Because I had made another choice, even though I was not aware of making it, I chucked the whole defense system. I could not use sickness to convince myself that I was, indeed, a body. Within minutes the entire episode was over and I was fine.

Now when I read this explanation for sickness in this lesson, I have no doubt that it is true.

“Sickness is a decision. It is not a thing that happens to you, quite unsought, which makes you weak and brings you suffering. It is a choice you make, a plan you lay, when for an instant truth arises in your own deluded mind, and all your world appears to totter and prepare to fall. Now are you sick, that truth may go away and threaten your establishments no more.”

That was exactly what happened that morning. That was in 2006 or 2007, I think, and it made such an impact on me that I remember it like it was yesterday. It changed everything about how I view sickness. You might think I would never be sick again, but that’s not how it works, evidently. It seems we have a strong desire to defend our little world.

I have to rediscover my defenses each time. Sometimes it is enough to know what is happening and sometimes not. But I have noticed that I seldom get sick anymore and when I do, I don’t stay sick long because I remind myself of why I chose sickness. So, it has made a difference.

Jesus says we suffer pain because the body does. I love this sentence because it reminds me that I am not the body, nor am I necessarily subject to the body. As I come to know my Self as who I am, less often do I feel what the body feels. I am not free of the body because I am not free of my identification with it, but I see a difference now.

I know it is possible to be free of it even while still appearing to be the body because David Hawkins did it. He had two surgeries without anesthetics because he didn’t believe in pain. If one person can do it then it is possible for all. My purpose is not to be free of pain, though that would be nice, but to be free of the belief that I am the body and that I want to be the body. When that happens I will no longer be interested in these insane defenses.

“God knows not of your plans to change His Will. The universe remains unheeding of the laws by which you thought to govern it.”

“You can but choose to think you die, or suffer sickness or distort the truth in any way. What is created is apart from all of this.”

Oh, my gosh. All this suffering and pain that we experience, and for what? We are having crazy thoughts, that’s all. Nothing is done to reality and so nothing is done to us as we are part of reality. There is no world, there are no bodies and sickness and death do not exist. We fool only ourselves with our defenses and they would be called silly if they were not so tragic. Why do we keep hurting ourselves like this? Why do we resist that inner desire for God and for our true Home.

“The Thoughts of God are quite apart from time. For time is but another meaningless defense you made against the truth.”

As Jesus as told us before, time is an illusion. This was really hard for me to accept. I mean, I accepted it as a concept but it had little meaning to me in my life. I am learning, though, that time is the way I keep the truth from being true now. I keep it in the future which doesn’t exist and so I am safe from an encounter with it.

See what a good defense against the truth time is? Aren’t we clever in our insanity? Thank God that truth has a power far beyond defense and we have the means to achieve it. All we need do is welcome it. Again today, I will quiet my mind and allow the Holy Spirit to further heal my sick thoughts so that I stop defending against the truth.

And how will we know that the body has been healed?

“And you will recognize you practiced well by this: The body should not feel at all. If you have been successful, there will be no sense of feeling ill or feeling well, of pain or pleasure. No response at all is in the mind to what the body does. Its usefulness remains and nothing more.”

And look at this incredible promise.

“Perhaps you do not realize that this removes the limits you had placed upon the body by the purposes you gave to it. As these are laid aside, the strength the body has will always be enough to serve all truly useful purposes. The body’s health is fully guaranteed, because it is not limited by time, by weather or fatigue, by food and drink, or any laws you made it serve before. You need do nothing now to make it well, for sickness has become impossible.”

And then he tells this.

“Yet this protection needs to be preserved by careful watching. If you let your mind harbor attack thoughts, yield to judgment or make plans against uncertainties to come, you have again misplaced yourself, and made a bodily identity which will attack the body, for the mind is sick.”

Ha! I knew there was a catch. ~smile~ And here is the solution to our forgetting.

“I have forgotten what I really am, for I mistook my body for myself. Sickness is a defense against the truth. But I am not a body. And my mind cannot attack. So I can not be sick.”

God, who am I? I want to know my Self.

Regina’s Tips

Let’s look at what this lesson has to say about the defenses we set up against truth:

~ “Defenses are not unintentional nor are they made without awareness.” — In other words, there is a conscious decision in favor of the defense. If my defense is sickness, there could be a tickle in the throat and then an immediate, even somewhat pleasurable, acceptance of, “I’m getting sick,” before I move into suffering. If my defense is busyness, there could be the joy of complaining about how busy I am to others. Or it might show up as using time on unimportant things first, until once again I create that sense of being too busy. Etc.

~ “They seem to be unconscious but because of the rapidity with which you choose. … It is this quick forgetting of the part you play in making your ‘reality’ that makes defenses seem to be beyond your own control.” — Whatever our defenses are, we create situations that keep us from seeking truth with our whole heart, whole mind and whole soul. Most people, wanting to believe their defenses are genuine, deny that they choose them. However, if we watch ourselves carefully, we will find ourselves making the choices that create defense situations. It can be seen, if we want to see it. (Remember not to judge yourself for what you find when you watch to discover your own defenses, but it is helpful to see how you block your own awakening so you can start to make different decisions when a similar choice-opportunity comes around again.)

~ “Yet who believes illusions but the one who made them up? Who else can see them and react to them as if they were the truth?” — And this is what we do. Whether our defense is sickness, family responsibility, busyness or something else, we decide to let it get in the way of seeking truth, and then we believe the situation is a genuine block that renders us helpless, because that is what we want to believe about it.

~ “[Truth] does not command obedience … Truth merely wants to give you happiness, for such its purpose is.” — We have the power to delay our own awakening for as long as we want. Truth will not force itself on us. We are the ones who need to ask ourselves, “What do I really want?” If we decide that we are interested in truth realization, then it is helpful to find how we defend against it.

Since memory can be faulty, I don’t recommend looking into the past to see if you set up this defense. If the defense is still an obstacle for you, it is because you continue to set it up as an obstacle now. Watch yourself going forward. Watch yourself for those quick decisions that you make that keep this defense in place so you can continue to avoid awakening.

Let’s bring awareness to the tricks that we play on ourselves. Let’s do this together, in love, as mighty companions joined in purpose.

My Thoughts

As usual, Regina adds some really good tips to help us use this lesson. I especially like that she points out other defenses. I also appreciate how she reminds us that we don’t have to look into the past to see how we set it up, if it is still happening, then look at how we are doing it now.

Manual for Teachers
There are so many ways I ask for what I don’t want. I ask for what the ego wants, but I am not the ego. The ego always thinks the solution is in the story, in the world of time and space. It prays for more money, a better relationship, a healthier body. If I think I am an ego, if I am highly identified with the ego mind, I believe these things will give me what I want.

As my mind has healed and I have begun to identify more closely with the self that God created, I realize that these are simply symbols of what it is I truly want. I want to be happy and peaceful. The ego mind thinks that having these things will give me peace and joy. But, while I may achieve a different relationship, a healthier body or more money, it is all temporary and the satisfaction is temporary. When I ask for what is not real, I ask it of the giver of the unreal. All the ego has to offer are shifting forms.

What I have learned is that I really want peace that never ends, and joy that is unaffected by anything. I want to remember what I am and I want to return to full and open communication with God. This is true prayer and it has been answered. I am accepting that answer as quickly and fully as I am able. Within that answer, all things needed are provided. If what I have asked for (and if it is in my life, I asked for it) does not bring me full joy, then it is not the will of God and so it is not my will. It is the ego separate will and I know that I can and want to choose again, this time asking from my true will.

Text
Proper Use of the Body

“Use it to bring the Word of God to those who have it not, and the body becomes holy. Because it is holy it cannot be sick, nor can it die. When its usefulness is done it is laid by, and that is all.” 
 
Jesus says something that is not universally accepted, I think. He says that if we give the body over to our function as decided by the Holy Spirit, and we don’t use it for the ego’s purposes, sickness will be impossible to us because the body will have become holy. I have not experienced that yet, but then, I have not been fully surrendered yet.

I very much want to release all of the ego beliefs in my mind and, equally, I want to be the channel for God’s Word and only that. My desire along with my unwavering commitment will help me to accomplish this. In the meantime, I do the best I can in every moment.

© 2019, Pathways of Light. https://dev.pathwaysoflight.org
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Posted by Rev. Myron Jones.

Gentle Healing Lesson 135, Manual for Teachers, Text.  5-2-19

LESSON 135
If I defend myself I am attacked.

“And herein lies the folly of defense; it gives illusions full reality, and then attempts to handle them as real. It adds illusions to illusions, thus making correction doubly difficult. And it is this you do when you attempt to plan the future, activate the past, or organize the present as you wish.”

“A healed mind does not plan. It carries out the plans that it receives through listening to wisdom that is not its own.”

I have known for a while now that I am not to make plans on my own. I know that I can ask for guidance in all things and receive it. I mostly do this, but not perfectly. Sometimes I use the ego mind to make my decisions and when I do this it is always based on what I know from past experiences. I do it because I feel threatened and I want to defend myself.

Here is an example of this. One year I didn’t have as much money to spend on Christmas as I have had in the past. I made some elaborate plans to compensate. It started at the beginning of the year. I put aside money in different ways and in different places. I planned ways to earn more money. I looked for bargains.

I warned my family ahead of time so they wouldn’t be surprised by the few gifts under the tree. I bought some things during the year a gift at a time when I had extra money. I used my credit card. I hoped for some extra money coming at Christmas as it sometimes does. All these plans were based on what I have learned from and experienced in the past.

All these plans were to defend me from disappointment and from disappointing others. It was all done to organize my Christmas in a way that suited me. Even the need for Christmas to be this way is based on the past in which as a child my parents love for me was expressed most fully as a big Christmas. I see that I defend myself from lack of love by organizing the present through activating the past and planning for the future.

“For no one walks the world in armature but must have terror striking at his heart.”

“Defense is frightening. It stems from fear, increasing fear as each defense is made.“

Clearly, the belief that I need all these defenses to have love and to give love only reinforce the fear that I lack love. It reinforces the fear that love can be lost. And it tells me that love can be bought and must be bought. By judging the present on the basis of the past, I don’t leave an opening for new information.

Perhaps love is different than I think. Perhaps it does not need my defense, but how would I know if I only believe what I learned in the past. And this situation that Christmas is just one of the ways that I defend and, in my defense, close my mind to the truth that is God’s gift to me.

“The body is in need of no defense. This cannot be too often emphasized. It will be strong and healthy if the mind does not abuse it by assigning it to roles it cannot fill, to purposes beyond its scope, and to exalted aims which it cannot accomplish. Such attempts, ridiculous yet deeply cherished, are the sources for the many mad attacks you make upon it. For it seems to fail your hopes, your needs, your values and your dreams.”

What are those purposes and roles the body cannot fill? What purpose do we give it that it cannot accomplish? When I identify with the body and think of it as myself, I use it in that way. It is then used to show the world I am worthy of love and admiration. It is clothed to say “Look at me, how wealthy I am or how fit I am, how good looking I am.”  “Look at what this body does, how kind and generous it is, how smart it is, how powerful and in control it is.” We are saying, look at my body, look at me.

It is not the body that I am. It is not the body’s job to fill these perceived needs for me. This is all in my mind and it is the mind that says I need these things and the mind that believes the body is failing me. Giving the body these purposes, I must then defend it against anything that interferes with those purposes.

I give it vitamins and exercise. I read articles on how to keep the brain working well. I dress it up and spend time with my hair stylist. I feed it properly and only the right amount. Actually, I don’t do many of those things anymore, but that is only because I have, for the most part, come to understand that the body is a neutral vehicle for navigating the world and for communicating love. All else is done with the mind and if I don’t like what is done, it is not the body that needs attention, but my thoughts.

As Jesus tells us, The “self” that needs protection is not real. The body, valueless and hardly worth the least defense, need merely be perceived as quite apart from you, and it becomes a healthy, serviceable instrument through which the mind can operate until its usefulness is over. Who would want to keep it when its usefulness is done? Knowing this it makes the whole process we go through in defending the body ridiculous.

Now here is something I don’t always consider. Jesus says that if we defend the body we have attacked our mind. We won’t see the body and mind as separate and what we see as weakness in the body we will see as coming from a mind that is limited and fragile. We will believe that not only are bodies separate from each other and from Source but so is the mind. When we let these thoughts be healed, the body will respond with health. We allow our minds to be healed and we will no longer look outside the mind for protection and healing of the body.

“What could you not accept, if you but knew that everything that happens, all events, past, present and to come, are gently planned by One Whose only purpose is your good? Perhaps you have misunderstood His plan, for He would never offer pain to you. But your defenses did not let you see His loving blessing shine in every step you ever took. While you made plans for death, He led you gently to eternal life.”

This is one of my favorite passages in the Course. The more surrendered I become the gentler the lessons. I do see His guiding hand in every aspect of my life. I trust this Guidance explicitly. There are still times in which I go off on my own, but as soon as I notice I have done so, I return my mind to God and let Him decide for me. I look forward in happy anticipation to the day in which my surrender is complete and I know my Self without any beliefs of the ego obscuring my sight.

I choose to continue my inward looking, not at my thoughts, but at the presence within. Today, I will begin that practice with this thought which is a variation on the thought that I want to know myself.

“If I defend myself I am attacked. But in defenselessness I will be strong, and I will learn what my defenses hide.”

Regina’s Tips
Today’s lesson is about Self-inquiry, ‘Who am I?’ And then it is about taking Self-inquiry one-step further by living from the answer.

My Thoughts
This is why I have added to my schedule the daily meditation asking to know my Self. Whatever is given me in that time, I live. I may not hear anything specifically, but what I notice is that I do things differently, I am not as obsessed with certain ideas that used to plague me, I follow directions without question when my heart leads me in an unexpected way.

Regina
Today’s lesson tells us that we use many forms of defense to try to protect who we think we are, and in so doing we hide the truth about ourselves from ourselves. We try to protect the body, because we think we are the body. We try to protect the psyche, because we think we are the psyche. Yet we are neither.

My thoughts
This is the core of the lesson, I think. When we defend who we think we are, there is no way for us to discover who we really are. It might not seem such a big deal that we spend a lot of time on the body, but what that means, that is, our motivation for doing so might be moving us more deeply into the ego. As Regina points out this lesson is not about ignoring the needs of the body, but it is about obsessive thinking about the body and its needs. I will add it is also about using the body to get what we think we need from others, like attention, approval and love.

Another thing Regina talks about is the difference between reasonable planning and planning in an attempt to control future outcomes. I have a day planner that I must use. It helps me remember when I have a student calling so that I am here and prepared. That is normal and helpful planning. If, however, I have hidden motives in using this planner, such as do I think that if I lost my planner this would be devasting?

Do I think the planner represents my worth as a teacher and as a human being, the blank spaces meaning that I am not doing enough or doing it well enough? Do I try to get students so I can fill up all the spaces and so feel good about myself? Or do I simply accept that as Jesus tells us in the Manual for Teachers that our students are waiting for us and so there is nothing to plan, no effort to make in order to be a teacher of God? Do I know that who shows up for what is out of my hands an in more capable hands, and means nothing about a personal “me?”

Manual for Teachers
I do hear the Voice for God, though not perfectly. I do share what I hear, but again, not perfectly.  I have always appreciated my teachers. These are God’s messengers who hear more clearly and share more precisely than I do. I have always had a teacher, someone who was a few steps ahead of me, someone whose steps I could follow. Not someone who is way ahead of me because then I would not understand the words she gave me, but far enough that she could lead me to my next level of understanding.

If I had no teacher in form, I would still get there, but not as quickly. The support that a good teacher provides has also been important to me. My teachers have not only gently guided me back on track when I temporarily lost my way; they have also reassured me when I was uncertain. They have not told me what I needed to do or believe, but have reminded me of the truth that is always available to me. They put the truth before me to accept or reject. If fear was too strong in me at that time, they left it there for when I was ready.

I have met many teachers over the years and sometimes I met teachers I couldn’t work with. That does not mean there is anything wrong with them, but only that they were not for me. This is why there are many teachers. The ones that are for us will be brought into our sphere. Jesus tells us that as teachers our students are waiting for us. This applies both ways. As students, our teachers are available to us when we are ready for them. It is in this way, teacher to student and student to teacher that we find our way home together.

Text
“When I said that the Holy Spirit’s function is to sort out the true from the false in your mind, I meant that He has the power to look into what you have hidden and recognize the Will of God there. His recognition of this Will can make it real to you because He is in your mind, and therefore He is your reality. If, then, His perception of your mind brings its reality to you, He is helping you to remember what you are.” T-9.I.4

Oh my! Do you see what Jesus is saying here? In my mind is the truth, in my mind is my true will, the Will of God, and as I am willing to accept His help, the Holy Spirit looks with me and I see it, too. Because the Holy Spirit is in my mind, I become aware of my true will which is the Will of God. The only thing standing between my awareness of the truth and the separated will of ego is the fear that knowing my Self is a loss.

When I think of salvation in these terms, it all seems so simple and so accessible. I hear the Voice for God very clearly and I hear it every day so I am convinced that the Holy Spirit is in my mind. Now Jesus is telling me that all He has to do to bring me to full awareness is to look into what I have hidden and recognize the Will of God there. It feels so close and so possible when I think of this. I’ve cried three times just writing this.

So this is what has been happening in my practice! I look at the thoughts and feelings that seem to make up my life and I invite the Holy Spirit to look with me. To the degree I am willing to be known, the Holy Spirit finds God there and shows It to me. I feel like a blind woman whose sight is beginning to return. Or maybe like an insane person who is coming out of her psychosis.

I have been doing exactly what I need to be doing, and I never gave thought to the miracle that is occurring. It was just a practice, and yes, it was changing everything so it was the best practice in the world, but never did I realize the true significance of that practice. It just seemed too simple to be this important.

© 2019, Pathways of Light. https://dev.pathwaysoflight.org
You may freely share copies of this with your friends, provided this notice is included.

Tell a friend about this post.

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Posted by Rev. Myron Jones.

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