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Gentle Healing Journal Lesson 93 2-5-19

LESSON 93
Light and joy and peace abide in me.

“The self you made is not the Son of God. Therefore, this self does not exist at all. And anything it seems to do and think means nothing. It is neither bad nor good. It is unreal, and nothing more than that.

Your sinlessness is guaranteed by God. Over and over this must be repeated, until it is accepted. It is true. Your sinlessness is guaranteed by God. Nothing can touch it, or change what God created as eternal. The self you made, evil and full of sin, is meaningless. Your sinlessness is guaranteed by God, and light and joy and peace abide in you.”

If I could completely accept this as absolutely true, just an undeniable fact, and if I would then accept that it must be true for all others if it is true for me, I would be done with this world. I am still as God created me. That is the fact that cannot be undone in my dreams. Sometimes, I think I believe this and then I will judge someone or myself, or I will worry or regret something and I am pulled out of my denial. Not denial that I am as God created me, but denial that I really believe that.

So here we go with the split mind again. I know this is true. I believe it. And I think I have made terrible mistakes beginning with the tiny mad idea and I feel bad about myself until I can’t stand the guilt and I think someone else made terrible mistakes. It’s the separation story all over again. But I never lose completely lose sight of my innocence. I never lose sight of the truth even as I slide down the rabbit hole again. This means I climb out faster and with less suffering and so I know I am making headway.

Regina’s Tip
…if I went into a big tirade about what a terrible tree you are, I could go on and on about how you never drop your leaves in the fall; I could go on and on about how trees are suppose to stay in one place and you are always moving around; I could go on and on about how you don’t put off enough shade, and you’d just think that I am crazy. Those thoughts wouldn’t affect you because you don’t think you are a tree. If you aren’t a tree, you can’t be a bad tree.

Well, if you aren’t a body, you can’t be a bad or stupid or ugly body. So we question all of the beliefs and ideas that are part of the “I am a body” thought system by questioning the basis of the thought system itself. What am I?

My Thoughts
I have started a process of asking “what am I?” several times but always forget to do it. Today, I posted notes in various places around my house asking that question. I am helping myself follow my true desire to know what I am until it becomes a habit and then until I know the answer.

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