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Study of Manual for Teachers 7-5-12

7-5-12
Continued 7 In this world the only remaining freedom is the freedom of choice; always between two choices or two voices. Will is not involved in perception at any level, and has nothing to do with choice. Consciousness is the receptive mechanism, receiving messages from above or below; from the Holy Spirit or the ego. Consciousness has levels and awareness can shift quite dramatically, but it cannot transcend the perceptual realm. At its highest it becomes aware of the real world, and can be trained to do so increasingly. Yet the very fact that it has levels and can be trained demonstrates that it cannot reach knowledge.

Will is not involved in perception at any level, and has nothing to do with choice. I’m intrigued by this sentence. If will were not the first word in the sentence would it still be capitalized? If Jesus is talking about Will, the Will I share with God, then this sentence is telling me that my true Will is not part of this dream and has nothing to do with perception. In this way it is like God not being part of our dream. Our Will is not part of the dream, but continues creating as it always has, and as it was created to do, but not within the dream.

If this is the individual will, the separated will, that is being referred to in this sentence then it would be telling us that we cannot use our ego will, our ego determination, to make our choice for God, and that even our flimsy excuse for control is non-existent. We tell ourselves that it is a strong will that keeps us from doing certain things, and our strong will that keeps us from not doing other things. It seems this is not true.

For instance, I used to tell myself that when my will to lose weight became strong enough then I would go on a diet and stick to it. I was using the idea of an ego will to exercise control of my life, and to place myself above God. I would lose weight to prove I was in charge of my life and was strong. I would fail to lose weight and even this proved I was in charge of my life, and even in my weakness I proved I was above God.

Myron wasn’t doing any of this because she does not exist except in my mind. The real me was simply expressing beliefs in a three dimensional way and then identifying with that expression. But there was no use of will involved. I believe something to be true and it appears before me in some form so I can see how that works, and to see if I want to keep that belief or have it purified by the Holy Spirit.

To keep this straight in my mind, Will is creative and so is not associated in any way with the illusion. And will is simply another expression of the idea of separation, and so is in no way real.

When the Course uses the word consciousness it is referring to the mechanism that allows us to hear the two voices. It hears what the Holy Spirit says or it hears what the ego says. It functions only in the illusion where it is needed. It learns and so shifts and changes accordingly. Consciousness will eventually become aware of the real world but will not reach knowledge, which is outside the realm of illusions.

I identify most closely with consciousness because that is what I have to work with here, though I do understand that this is not what I am, but it is what I use. Yesterday I was doing errands and I began to feel mildly anxious. I watched my mind to see what was going on and realized it had been racing from one senseless thought to another. I deliberately shifted my focus to true thoughts and peace was restored.

This is an example of the consciousness mechanism at work. The awareness of the problem along with the decision for another Voice happened quickly because the consciousness is being trained to that purpose. I was also very aware that this is not who I am, and that awareness is growing.

I sometimes now have the sensation of not identifying self as Myron, though I know her well and so feel an attachment for her. (That sounds strange and is not actually accurate, but that is how it feels.) But I don’t have any feeling for who I am. I have words and concepts that I have learned through A Course in Miracles and through the Holy Spirit, but I don’t have any feeling for my true Self, nor any memory of what that is. Yesterday when that realization occurred, I felt like crying for a moment, but then was comforted. That Self is not lost, just out of my awareness for now.

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