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Manual for Teacher: A. Development of Trust, P 6. 11-08-17

A. Development of Trust, P 6

6 Now comes “a period of settling down.” This is a quiet time, in which the teacher of God rests a while in reasonable peace. Now he consolidates his learning. Now he begins to see the transfer value of what he has learned. Its potential is literally staggering, and the teacher of God is now at the point in his progress at which he sees in it his whole way out. “Give up what you do not want, and keep what you do.” How simple is the obvious! And how easy to do! The teacher of God needs this period of respite. He has not yet come as far as he thinks. Yet when he is ready to go on, he goes with mighty companions beside him. Now he rests a while, and gathers them before going on. He will not go on from here alone.

Journal
We have just gone through a period of a lot of work! Up to this time, we were learning what has value and what does not. We were learning that we don’t want to keep the valueless and how to let it go. Often there were many steps in this process and a lot of retracing our steps before we were really done with the valueless. We have earned a respite, a time of settling down.

As we have learned all these valuable lessons, we have also learned that what the ego made complicated in our mind wasn’t really complicated at all. It is really very simple. We have many thoughts that come from mistaken beliefs and those beliefs cause us to suffer. We learned that letting them go ended our suffering. We learned that to let them go all we needed to do was to give them to the Holy Spirit, and to the degree, our decision was unopposed by a conflicting desire, it was done for us. Truly, very simple.

Sometimes we mistake a rest stop for the end of the journey. It feels so good to be here, so much better than life before we did this work that we think we are done. But this is not the end; as good as this feels, it is going to be so much better when we go on and finish the process. It is at this point that we gather our mighty companions before we proceed. Some of these companions will be unseen and some will be teachers, writers, fellow students, anyone who is going to support us on our journey and help us move forward to the end.

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Manual for Teachers: A. Development of Trust, P 5. 11-1-17

A. Development of Trust, P 5
5 The third stage through which the teacher of God must go can be called “a period of relinquishment.” If this is interpreted as giving up the desirable, it will engender enormous conflict. Few teachers of God escape this distress entirely. There is, however, no point in sorting out the valuable from the valueless unless the next obvious step is taken. Therefore, the period of overlap is apt to be one in which the teacher of God feels called upon to sacrifice his own best interests on behalf of truth. He has not realized as yet how wholly impossible such a demand would be. He can learn this only as he actually does give up the valueless. Through this, he learns that where he anticipated grief, he finds a happy light-heartedness instead; where he thought something was asked of him, he finds a gift bestowed on him.

Journal
Having sorted out the valuable from the valueless, it is then, time to relinquish that which is recognized as without value. At first, this can feel difficult and even painful because it might feel like we are called to sacrifice what we want and what we believe we need on behalf of truth. However, my experience has been that once done, I see that I have lost nothing and gained my freedom.

When I was still working, I began to realize that I had to give up competitiveness. As a salesperson, I thought that this meant the possibility of losing customers and so eventually losing my job. I had to decide what was more important to me, keeping my job or awakening. I had already determined that competitiveness was valueless, at least in concept, but concepts are worthless if you don’t live them.

So I gave up the idea that I was in competition for my customers or to seem better than my co-workers. I was surprised to discover that doing my job as an act of love was far better and cost me nothing. The joy and satisfaction I received as I extended love in the workplace would have been worth losing my job, but that didn’t happen. The more love I gave, the more I received and often that showed up in increased sales and more loyal customers.

One of the hardest areas that I have worked with is the special relationship. The idea of giving up my special relationships was so frightful that it took me a long time to make that leap of faith. I became fully convinced that special relationships were valueless and I accepted the idea that they could be transformed if I wanted that but letting go of them took more strength than I had alone. Fortunately, I am not alone.

This showed up in my relationships with my children for the most part. No matter how unhealthy the relationship, I clung to it. In my mind, it was my salvation and I didn’t know any other way to be with them. Slowly, though, I shored up my trust and I asked the Holy Spirit to transform these relationships. It has taken a number of years, but they have all shifted.

I used to say yes when I really meant no because I was afraid of rocking the boat. I didn’t believe in myself and so I could not accept that they believed in me. I thought for sure that I had to earn their love, and saying yes was how I did that. I used to think I had to fix everything for them, not realizing that it was not my job to do so and that they didn’t need me to do that. I used to think that I had to keep peace between them at all costs, and that was not for me to do either.

Once again, I saw that relinquishment cost me nothing. I discovered that I didn’t need them to be special to me and me to be special to them. We are even closer than we ever were without making the relationship special. I still have a few things to relinquish in that area, but it is happening more gently and easily now.

I relinquished the idea that I could make decisions on my own or that I even wanted to. By the time I started working on that, my faith in the process was strong and it only took practice. There was little fear involved and little resistance. Now I am looking at relinquishing it all in complete surrender of self. I anticipate a wonderful gift in its place.

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C 15: III. Littleness versus Magnitude, P 3. 10-31-17

III. Littleness versus Magnitude, P 3
3 There is a deep responsibility you owe yourself, and one you must learn to remember all the time. The lesson may seem hard at first, but you will learn to love it when you realize that it is true and is but a tribute to your power. You who have sought and found littleness, remember this: Every decision you make stems from what you think you are, and represents the value that you put upon yourself. Believe the little can content you, and by limiting yourself you will not be satisfied. For your function is not little, and it is only by finding your function and fulfilling it that you can escape from littleness.

Journal
“You who have sought and found littleness, remember this: Every decision you make stems from what you think you are, and represents the value that you put upon yourself.”

What do I think I am? I used to think I was this body/personality that I go by as Myron. So all decisions I made stemmed from that idea of who I was. When I was young and I decided to party to excess, it was because I thought it would enhance my standing with others my age. And I thought it would make life more fun and exciting for me. I made those decisions based on the idea that I was not enough as I was and needed the enhancement. I thought I needed something else in my life because what I had was not fulfilling.

Later in this life, I thought that I would feel fulfilled if I had children, and then I looked for fulfillment in my job and a steadily rising income. I thought I won when I did better than others. I thought that would give me more standing among my peers. All this time, I thought I was Myron and though I was learning differently, it had not really permeated my being and had not trickled down to my everyday behavior. So many of my decisions were still focused on the idea that I was the body/personality of Myron and, thus, on what would be best for that one based on what was know at the time.

Finally, I began to absorb what I was learning about my true nature. I was no longer completely convinced that I was a body/personality and more and more I accepted that I was something else altogether, something not even related to the body and her personality. As I continued to practice what I was learning, I began to identify with this something else more than I related to Myron. In my mind, I began to refer to Myron as “she” instead of “me”. I began to make decisions based on self as spirit rather than on what would enhance her ego image. In the past, the value I placed on Myron was pretty low, and it needed constant bolstering. My value now is not based on Myron, but on me as an expression of God.

“For your function is not little, and it is only by finding your function and fulfilling it that you can escape from littleness.”

Now, I recognize my value as an extension of God and my decisions are most often based on what needs to be done to completely undo the ego for all of the Sonship. This is my true function. I came here with this function in mind, knowing this is what I wanted to do. But on arriving, I opened my eyes with no idea who I was or why I was here. It has taken me this long to recover my memory and to realize my true purpose. Now when I say “I” I refer to self as I exist in reality, or at least to my clearest memory of self. Knowing my function now, which is not little, I am escaping from littleness, and every day I reawaken a bit more to my grandeur.

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Manual for Teacher: A. Development of Trust, P 4. 10-30-17

A. Development of Trust, P4
4 Next, the teacher of God must go through “a period of sorting out.” This is always somewhat difficult because, having learned that the changes in his life are always helpful, he must now decide all things on the basis of whether they increase the helpfulness or hamper it. He will find that many, if not most of the things he valued before will merely hinder his ability to transfer what he has learned to new situations as they arise. Because he has valued what is really valueless, he will not generalize the lesson for fear of loss and sacrifice. It takes great learning to understand that all things, events, encounters and circumstances are helpful. It is only to the extent to which they are helpful that any degree of reality should be accorded them in this world of illusion. The word “value” can apply to nothing else.

Journal
“It takes great learning to understand that all things, events, encounters and circumstances are helpful.”

I certainly found that to be true. At first, I was very afraid to believe this. When something I thought of as bad happened, I felt anxious at the idea of accepting it was helpful. It just seemed too counterintuitive, and I was afraid that by accepting everything I was just asking for more suffering. It felt too much like sacrifice and that was what I was afraid of all along, that God wanted my sacrifice.

Later, I began to see that some of those “bad” experiences, were actually helpful and I lost some of my fear, but I was still very selective in what I accepted. For instance, I would have a financial crisis, watch my fear thoughts and ask for healing, and experience a miracle as I became calm and even happy. I could see the value of the situation and the practice. But when it came to some of my special relationships, I was too entangled with them to consider the painful experiences as helpful.

Now, I finally have had that great learning and I never doubt that all circumstances are helpful. I believe this for myself and for all others, even for my children. That was the last great lesson for me when it comes to this particular idea. Of course, I am compassionate to my children’s suffering, but I also understand that these painful circumstances have the potential to help them wake up.

“This is always somewhat difficult because, having learned that the changes in his life are always helpful, he must now decide all things on the basis of whether they increase the helpfulness or hamper it.”

This is the sorting out that we must do. We have valued many things that are not truly valuable, and that actually hamper our awakening. I used to value my image. I wanted people to think of me in a certain way, and when they didn’t, I would be very upset. I used to value money and judged myself on the basis of how much I had. This showed up as pride in the car I could afford to drive and the brand name on my clothes as an indication of my affluence.

There are other ways we value what is not valuable. My special relationships, for instance, were very hard for me to give up, and it is even now a challenge at times. I value physical comfort. I am learning to let that one go a bit at a time. An example of how I am doing that occurred just yesterday.

It started raining while I was out and I dreaded getting out of the car and getting soaked. I know this isn’t the end of the world, but I really hate that. So I used my present mantra for these situations. I reminded myself that I can’t change this, I don’t want to change this, I am not asking anything of this situation. It is irrelevant. Because I accept this as true and want to live it, the mantra works for me.

You might wonder why this even matters. Well, there is the obvious benefit, that is, when I resisted the reality of the situation I suffered, and when I accepted the situation I didn’t suffer. But even more important is that when I believed that I hated getting rained on and that it shouldn’t happen, I was declaring myself a victim of the world. And, I was placing myself in a subcategory of people who don’t like to get wet in the rain and thus strengthening my belief in separation.

And here is the reason I don’t simply accept this sort of reasoning.

“It is only to the extent to which they are helpful that any degree of reality should be accorded them in this world of illusion. The word “value” can apply to nothing else.”

I will not value what is valueless because in doing so, I am binding myself ever so much more tightly to the illusion. So it is easy now to know if I want to keep a belief. I ask myself, “Does this belief bring me closer to the peace of God or does it take me further away?” The answer to that question determines if I a want to keep the idea or to have it corrected by the Holy Spirit. If it does not bring me closer to peace and love, closer to awakening, it has no value to me and so does not truly exist. I chuck it!

© 2017, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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Study of Text, C 15: III. Litleness versus Magnitude, P 2. 10-27-17

III. Littleness versus Magnitude, P 2
2 Yet what you do not realize, each time you choose, is that your choice is your evaluation of yourself. Choose littleness and you will not have peace, for you will have judged yourself unworthy of it. And whatever you offer as a substitute is much too poor a gift to satisfy you. It is essential that you accept the fact, and accept it gladly, that there is no form of littleness that can ever content you. You are free to try as many as you wish, but all you will be doing is to delay your homecoming. For you will be content only in magnitude, which is your home.

Journal
I had spent most of my life trying to get ahead, to become a better person, to somehow make up for the mistakes I had made over the years. I had squandered years trying to be someone special, someone, who would impress others. For a while, I was obsessed with obituaries. I would read each one, reading their legacies, and measuring myself against them. I wanted so much to be remembered for something important. Then, I found A Course in Miracles.

Looking back on it, I see that the legacy thing happened shortly before I found the Course. I think this was in preparation for what was to come. There is a knowing that we are intended to leave a legacy behind, but we get drawn into the hypnotic trance of the world, and it gets twisted in our mind. We start thinking that our legacy is about what we do in the world when it is really about how we undo our world. I heard Bentinho Massaro express it something like this: Our life is not about our life.

We all have an intention for magnitude when we come here. It is in our mind and ready to come forward when we are ready for it. I didn’t realize that A Course in Miracles was part of my expression of this magnitude, at least not for a long time. In Right Teaching and Right Learning (T 15: I, P 9) Jesus says this.

“You are not at peace because you are not fulfilling your function. God gave you a very lofty function that you are not meeting.”

This lofty function he speaks of is the intention we set for ourselves. I know someone who touched his intention when he was fairly young. In a dream he had, he was reminded of this. He was told that he needed to choose the direction he wanted to go in his life. Did he want to play little and fulfill a wish to become wealthy, or did he want to fulfill his spiritual destiny? He chose the former and has done well, but is unfulfilled. I often wonder if he remembers that dream.

I am very grateful that he told me about that dream all those years ago. It made an impact on my consciousness and I have never forgotten it. All those years when I was still choosing to be less small, there was a part of my mind that was still seeking my true purpose even when I didn’t realize it. Another thing that Jesus says in Right Teaching and Right Learning is this.

“God is inevitable, and you cannot avoid Him any more than He can avoid you.”

Thank you, God, that this is true and that I know it and embrace it, finally.

© 2017, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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Manual for Teacher: A. Development of Trust, P 3. 10-26-17

A. Development of Trust
3 First, they must go through what might be called “a period of undoing.” This need not be painful, but it usually is so experienced. It seems as if things are being taken away, and it is rarely understood initially that their lack of value is merely being recognized. How can lack of value be perceived unless the perceiver is in a position where he must see things in a different light? He is not yet at a point at which he can make the shift entirely internally. And so the plan will sometimes call for changes in what seem to be external circumstances. These changes are always helpful. When the teacher of God has learned that much, he goes on to the second stage.

Journal
I don’t experience a great deal of distress at necessary changes anymore. I am still undoing, but I am certain that I want to, and having seen that it is good to make these changes, I don’t hesitate to make them. When I first began the undoing process I did not have this certainty. I had to develop trust as I did the practice. When I was completely unsure that this was for my best good, undoing was indeed painful.

Imagine that you had the ability to levitate, but you didn’t know about the ability, had no idea you could levitate. I come along and tell you to step off a cliff. I tell you that you cannot imagine the freedom you will feel when you realize you don’t have to worry about falling ever again. And to know this extraordinary freedom all you have to do is step out.

Even though you might trust me, or know you should trust me, you would be reluctant to give up the “safety” of the ground that seems to support you and keep you from certain death. You would value this sense of safety and be reluctant to let it go, and yet this trustworthy person is offering you the chance to be forever free of your fear of falling.

The true change being offered is that you would be giving up the sense of loss, vulnerability, and fear. But the outward appearance is that you would have to give up the safety of the ground under your feet. It would probably feel very frightening and very painful to contemplate and no matter how much you trusted me, extremely hard to take that first step into air.

Imagine now that you did finally step out and discovered that you really could levitate. The next time I told you that you could do something extraordinary you might experience fear, but you would have developed some trust and it would not be nearly so hard. You would have seen that I mean you only good. Suppose the next thing I tell you is that you can walk through fire and be unharmed. You will still be reluctant to let go of the safety of the place that has no fire, but you will consider my words with less trepidation than when you had the first experience of undoing a belief.

After many experiences of undoing, I know that they are all for my good, and I do trust the Holy Spirit. I have learned that I value all the wrong things, and though I feel some trepidation at giving up some beliefs, I also know that I will. I have developed trust to that degree and so this process is not seen as being as painful as it used to be and it is not so protracted.

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Study of Text, C 15: III. Littleness versus Magnitude, P 1, 10-25-17

III. Littleness versus Magnitude, P 1
1 Be not content with littleness. But be sure you understand what littleness is, and why you could never be content with it. Littleness is the offering you give yourself. You offer this in place of magnitude, and you accept it. Everything in this world is little because it is a world made out of littleness, in the strange belief that littleness can content you. When you strive for anything in this world in the belief that it will bring you peace, you are belittling yourself and blinding yourself to glory. Littleness and glory are the choices open to your striving and your vigilance. You will always choose one at the expense of the other.

Journal
We are an extension of God, and even here we are expressions of God, and we can reflect that if we choose to do so. It isn’t easy at first. We have the intention of doing this, of being a clear reflection of our divinity, but at our birth, we forget who we are and we forget our intention. We spend the rest of our lives striving to remember why we came. That true desire to live big gets twisted into striving for something in the world that mimics magnitude but keeps us small.

From the moment we decide for God, we receive all the help we need to live our intention. We find A Course in Miracles and the teachers that are meant for us. And in each experience, we find a lesson that brings us closer to our goal. But before we get to that help, we have already built an ego construct that we quickly come to identify as our self.

We are taught from birth who we are by people who don’t even know who they are. We gather layer after layer of identity and when we are ready to remember our true identity, we must first loosen our acquired identity. We must learn to turn aside from our learned preferences, from the distractions of the world, and from all that we have come to value, that which props up our construct.

Imagine how hard that must be for people who have constructed a powerful or famous or wealthy self-identity. So many of them are obviously not happy, they get sick just like the rest of us and they loose people they love; their carefully constructed identity cannot protect them from the inevitable effects of separation. Their efforts fail them because they are trying for magnitude through littleness. Everything of this world is little because nothing of this world is real.

It can be just as hard for those of us who live ordinary lives. We gather family so we feel loved and they disappoint us or die or leave. We get educations, but no matter what level of education we receive, what accolades are heaped on us for our efforts, we still feel that something is missing. We fall in love and out of love and into heartache. We get good jobs and lose them or regret them or squander our life on them.

No matter what we do, what we buy, who we impress, we still are not satisfied because we are meant for so much more, and there is that secret knowing buried in our minds that we are not living up to our potential. There will come a time for each of us to remember, though. We are not meant for littleness. We did not come here to live small. We are magnificent beings, children of a magnificent God. When we decide to put aside our striving to make something of nothing, we will open our minds and hearts to the magnitude that we are meant for.

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