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Study of Text, Chapter 11, VII.The Way to Remember God, P 10. 1-21-16

VII. The Way to Remember God, P 10

10 We are therefore embarking on an organized, well-structured and carefully planned program aimed at learning how to offer to the Holy Spirit everything you do not want. He knows what to do with it. You do not understand how to use what He knows. Whatever is given Him that is not of God is gone. Yet you must look at it yourself in perfect willingness, for otherwise His knowledge remains useless to you. Surely He will not fail to help you, since help is His only purpose. Do you not have greater reason for fearing the world as you perceive it, than for looking at the cause of fear and letting it go forever?

Journal
I notice that I have a couple of areas in my life that I seem determined to defend against God’s Love. I have let so much go and yet these problems remain. I am tempted to think of them has harder or more important, or proof that not all healing is possible. But the truth is, I don’t have different problems; I have one problem. It just shows up in different forms.

One of those forms that I have not allowed the Holy Spirit to correct for me is this. I make choices to not do certain things and then I do them anyway. For instance, I decide to not eat sugar and then before the day is out I have succumbed to the desire for a pastry. Then I feel guilty and weak and helpless against my own compulsions. Very ego of me, isn’t it?

And that is the point. The only problem I have is that I think I separated from God. That belief makes itself known in the world of time and space as this situation in which I seem to prove over and over that I cannot be part of God, because, obviously, I am weak and helpless. Failing to stop eating sugar is just a representation of the desire to remain separate. Eating or not eating sugar is not, of itself, important in any way. It is just a symbol of my fear of Love, and my determination to keep it blocked.

When I fail to live up to a commitment I make, the guilt builds for awhile and then one day I feel depressed about it. I feel hopeless as well as helpless. I think I will never do this and that even the Holy Spirit has given up on me. And the endless, disheartening cycle continues. Fortunately, while my mind is still split, I am more in touch with the right side than I used to be and so I don’t let myself get sucked down into this scary place for too long before I make another choice.

I long for this cycle to be completely broken and I know it will, just as other projections have been healed. I am reminded that a characteristic of God’s teachers is patience. So I rest in God for a moment and let my soul be soothed and comforted. I embrace patience knowing this, too, shall pass and there is no possibility of failure, so I can indeed afford to be patient. One day I will let this go forever.

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Study of Text, Chapter 12: !. The Way to Remember God, P 9. 1-19-16

II. The Way to Remember God, P 9

9 You who have tried to banish love have not succeeded, but you who choose to banish fear must succeed. The Lord is with you, but you know it not. Yet your Redeemer liveth, and abideth in you in the peace out of which He was created. Would you not exchange this awareness for the awareness of fear? When we have overcome fear—not by hiding it, not by minimizing it, and not by denying its full import in any way—this is what you will really see. You cannot lay aside the obstacles to real vision without looking upon them, for to lay aside means to judge against. If you will look, the Holy Spirit will judge, and He will judge truly. Yet He cannot shine away what you keep hidden, for you have not offered it to Him and He cannot take it from you.

Journal
As Jesus tells us often, we are only pretending to abandon love because it cannot be done. What can and must be done is that we abandon fear. We will do that because the Lord is with us. We can be aware of this rather than aware of fear. The way we do this is simple. We overcome fear when we stop hiding and denying and minimizing. Trying to use the ego mind to rid ourselves of it in some way is how we keep it.

We must give our fear thoughts to the Holy Spirit to judge for us and He will always judge them as false. To give them to Him we must do more than say the words. There must be a willingness to really see the fear, to acknowledge the import fear has on us. That means feeling the fear. Here is what happens for me.

I have something that must be done at work and so far I have not succeeded. I started getting anxious about that. Then I was talking to my son on the phone and he was describing his efforts to get his finances in order. This brought up mine, and I told him how my plans to retire are coming along. Then I told him I had not yet added up my basic costs to see if my income will cover everything. I new that I was avoiding this out of fear.

When I went to bed these worries were on my mind and I couldn’t sleep. I tried to put them aside but they kept coming back. I tried to reassure myself that it would all work out and thought about solutions to the problems. I could feel myself getting more and more anxious. I stopped the runaway fear thoughts by reminding myself of what matters.

I reminded myself that the peace of God is everything I want. I did this several times. I have a little card above my desk that says, “Holy Spirit, I’m listening.” I thought about that card each time the ego tried to drag me back into the fear. “I’m listening, Holy Spirit.” I listened to Him tell me that I am loved and safe and that the peace of God is mine. He reminded me that I am not a victim to my thoughts. That was very helpful.

I know that the ego mind will try to engage me in fear and guilt thoughts until the desire for them is completely gone. It is not a surprise that it happens at times, and each time it does I look with the Holy Spirit and make a choice. There was a time it would have taken me days to let my fear go. There was a time when the fear would have consumed me and left me shaking and crying.

Now I notice fear thoughts and turn to the Holy Spirit immediately. I am not afraid of the thoughts and I am not willing to keep them. Last night I was anxious and began to obsess about these problems, but I am used to peace now and I can’t maintain this kind of anxiety. I miss peace as soon as I give it up and I want it back.

Yes, sitting in the fear was uncomfortable, but I can’t give it up unless I look at it with Spirit, feel it, acknowledge its effect on me. Doing that I can then truly decide if I want to keep it or if I want to let it go. When I asked Holy Spirit to take it from me, I knew what I was asking and I was certain of my decision. And it was done.

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Study of Text, Chapter 12: !. The Way to Remember God, P 8. 1-18-16

II. The Way to Remember God, P 8
8 There is no fear in perfect love. We will but be making perfect to you what is already perfect in you. You do not fear the unknown but the known. You will not fail in your mission because I did not fail in mine. Give me but a little trust in the name of the complete trust I have in you, and we will easily accomplish the goal of perfection together. For perfection is, and cannot be denied. To deny the denial of perfection is not so difficult as to deny truth, and what we can accomplish together will be believed when you see it as accomplished.

Journal

What I understand from this paragraph is that I am perfect and all that is being done now through this study and through my acceptance is that I am choosing to know this perfection. My desire to know is my part and my practices feed my desire and my willingness. I cannot fail in my mission to awaken because Jesus did not fail in his. What is accomplished through him, is accomplished in us all. This is done.

All that is left is that I accept that it is done through my desire that it be done and through my willingness to be done. So I continue to do the lessons, to read the Text, to allow the Holy Spirit to heal my mind. I continue to be vigilant for my thoughts and willing to be corrected when they are not in alignment with truth. I continue to do these things as long as is needed until perfection is seen as accomplished. I trust Jesus and in that trust, I have come to trust myself as well.

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Study of Text, Chapter 11, VII.The Way to Remember God, P 7. 1-15-16

II. The Way to Remember God, P 7

7 A little while and you will see me, for I am not hidden because you are hiding. I will awaken you as surely as I awakened myself, for I awoke for you. In my resurrection is your release. Our mission is to escape from crucifixion, not from redemption. Trust in my help, for I did not walk alone, and I will walk with you as our Father walked with me. Do you not know that I walked with Him in peace? And does not that mean that peace goes with us on the journey?

Journal
I read, “I will awaken you as surely as I awakened myself,” and I just sat and cried awhile. It was tears of joy but also tears of longing. Kind of a mixed bag, that, but that is where I am right now. Kind of mixed up. I know what I never knew before, but I also become confused, still. I also cry tears of gratitude that I cannot stay in this mixed up place forever, because I do not walk this path alone.

Jesus is very real to me now. I know that on some level I have not reached yet, this is not exactly accurate. He is me and I am him and we are not separate in any way, nor are we separate from God. But right here, right now, in this place and state in which I know myself, Jesus is my brother and I walk with him in complete trust. I turn to him in my fear and my guilt and my confusion, and just as he promised, he takes my hand and walks me through it.

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Study of Text, Chapter 12, II.The Way to Remember God, P 6. 1-14-16

II. The Way to Remember God, P 6

6 You still want what God wills, and no nightmare can defeat a child of God in his purpose. For your purpose was given you by God, and you must accomplish it because it is His Will. Awake and remember your purpose, for it is your will to do so. What has been accomplished for you must be yours. Do not let your hatred stand in the way of love, for nothing can withstand the Love of Christ for His Father, or His Father’s Love for Him.

Journal
I want what God wills. There is still some confusion left in my mind and so I forget that and return to wishing with the ego until I notice what I have done, and then I remember my purpose. I want to wake up from this dream story and know my oneness with God again. I want to remember the love that I am and the love that is my Father. I want to remember what it is like to love God without any fear or uncertainty.

Because this is my will and my heart’s desire, I must have it. Nothing can stand in the way of God’s Will and I share that Will. I must have this because it has already been accomplished for me. I am happy to be vigilant for the hateful ego stories that block my awareness of my true self. And any story that blocks the awareness of loves presence is hateful even if it is disguised as pleasant or even wonderful. All illusions are hateful because they keep me from knowing the love of God.

It helps me stay on course as I remember that this is true. The illusion is still an illusion when it seems to be a happy illusion, and illusions keep me from all that is real. I love my children and yet this love is a pale thing next to the love of God. I am happier and more peaceful in my story than I ever have been, and yet, it is nothing compared to the peace of God and the joy that is mine right now.

Here is what the ego offers me, the temptations that entice me to stay in the dream.
·      The illusion of a separate personal self
·      The illusion of love
·      The illusion of winning
·      The illusion of success
·      The illusion of happiness
·      The illusion of emotions
·      The illusion of choices
·      The illusion of decisions
·      The illusion of meaning and purpose
·      The illusion that maybe the next story will be better, more interesting, happier, more exciting
·      The illusion of victimhood
·      The illusion of lack and loss
·      The illusion of being unfairly treated
·      The illusion of fear and guilt
·      The illusion of pain, suffering and death

Here is what God offers me.
·      Everything, all of Himself

Today, I ask my Helper to remind me of what it is I want. When the ego offers me it’s “gifts” I will choose God instead. If I fail to do that, I will notice my error and choose again. This seems to be working for me. I feel the shift in understanding and the shift in awareness. I feel something I don’t know how to describe, and I want it all the time.

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Study of Text, Chapter 12: !. The Way to Remember God, P 5. 1-12-16

II. The Way to Remember God, P 5

5 Let us not save nightmares, for they are not fitting offerings for Christ, and so they are not fit gifts for you. Take off the covers and look at what you are afraid of. Only the anticipation will frighten you, for the reality of nothingness cannot be frightening. Let us not delay this, for your dream of hatred will not leave you without help, and Help is here. Learn to be quiet in the midst of turmoil, for quietness is the end of strife and this is the journey to peace. Look straight at every image that rises to delay you, for the goal is inevitable because it is eternal. The goal of love is but your right, and it belongs to you despite your dreams.

Journal
The ego mind is all about saving nightmares. This morning as I was doing Lesson 12, I am upset because I see a meaningless world, I wrote in my journal about how I used to be upset about the messiness of my life. (http://tinyurl.com/jnfkdsf) I would listen to the ego mind tell me I needed to stop being messy so that I will feel better. I needed to be more organized and get things done on time. Well, that had been my goal for most of my life and here I sit in my messy office. Very nearly sixty seven years has not been enough time to fix this problem.

I have stopped hiding under the covers where this problem is concerned. I have chosen to look right at it, and to see that my messy life is not what upsets me, but rather it is my thoughts about what that means. I had been giving it the meaning that I am not ok, that I am unworthy and vulnerable. With the Holy Spirit’s help, I have let go of this meaning, and I have found peace in my life.

Now I look at my messy desk and laugh. Then, instead of being anxious that something important, something urgent, is hiding under those piles of paper, I just ask the Holy Spirit what it is I should do now. What I have discovered is that if there is something to be done in the world, I will be told what it is. The thought to do a particular thing will just appear in my mind. I am learning to trust my life to His care.

The Holy Spirit is the Help given us by God. Before we dreamed of separation, we didn’t need Help, but now that we do, we are given that Help. I am learning to turn to Him in every situation. When I become anxious about anything, I get still for a moment and in that stillness I am inviting Help. As peace settles over me, I look at the perceived problem with my Helper and allow the solution to be given me. Often the only thing that I need to do, is realize that my thoughts are upsetting me, and allow the Holy Spirit to correct those thoughts.

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Study of Text, Chapter 12: !. The Way to Remember God, P 4. 1-11-16

II. The Way to Remember God, P 4
4 Remember what was said about the frightening perceptions of little children, which terrify them because they do not understand them. If they ask for enlightenment and accept it, their fears vanish. But if they hide their nightmares they will keep them. It is easy to help an uncertain child, for he recognizes that he does not understand what his perceptions mean. Yet you believe that you do understand yours. Little child, you are hiding your head under the cover of the heavy blankets you have laid upon yourself. You are hiding your nightmares in the darkness of your own false certainty, and refusing to open your eyes and look at them.

Journal
Yesterday I had a guilty thought that led to frightening thought that led to a general sense of unease. By the end of the day I was feeling tired and listless. I was that child who was hiding under the covers of my certainty that guilt and fear are real and threatening. But not quite the same child who used to have the covers pulled up over her head and lay there shivering and terrorized by her own beliefs.

The difference was that even though I was attracted to the guilt and fear, I was also aware that there is a way out. I had the covers pulled up, but beneath the covers I was talking to Holy Spirit. I was saying, “Here I am, under the cover of these false beliefs. Please correct my thinking.” Then I would let my mind go hazy again and distract myself with something so that I would not hear the answer. Oh man, sometimes I am so silly.

This morning’s lesson reminds us that our thoughts are meaningless. It says that we can counteract our ego thoughts by remembering that they don’t mean anything. When I had this guilty thought I might have said to myself, “This thought doesn’t mean anything.” Instead, I said to myself that this thought means I am unworthy and condemned.

Today I am sane again and I am laughing at the nonsense of yesterday. I am also feeling grateful for the simple lessons and the many tools we have to bring us to our sanity. I am going to use today’s lesson often. I feel excited to think about doing this lesson, and I see how I can use it to fully awaken if every time I have an ego thought that encourages the illusion, I simply remember that this thought does not mean anything.

© 2016, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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