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Looking at Anger Part II

Hello holy Lights,

The following continues from the previous page of this journal. The beginning part are paragraphs from WB Lesson 136.

“There is no miracle you can have unless you want it.”
“All healing is release from the past.”

“To forgive is to heal. All physical forms of sickness, sickness, even unto death, are expressions of of the fear of awakening. Sickness is a defense against the truth. Sickness is not an accident ...... it is an insane device for self deception. And like all the rest its purpose is to hide reality, attack it, change it render it inept, distort it twist it, or reduce to to a little pile of unassembled parts. The aim of all defenses is to keep the truth from being whole.

“God knows not of your plans to change His Will. You can but choose to think you do this, or suffer sickness or distort the truth in any way. What is created [God’s Will] is apart from all of this. Defenses are plans to defeat what cannot be attacked. What is unalterable cannot change. And what is wholly sinless cannot sin.
How can you think that sickness can shield you from the truth? Because it “proves” the body is not separate from you, and so you must be separate from the Truth. You suffer pain because the body does and in this pain are you made one with it [body].

“Truth has a power far beyond defense, for no illusions can remain where truth has been allowed to enter. And it comes to any mind that would lay down its arms, and cease to play with folly.  (Truth) is found at anytime; today if you will choose to practice giving welcome to the truth. Truth merely wants to give you happiness, for such it’s purpose is. With perfect certainty, truth knows that what God wills for you must be received.

“A healing prayer to help us rise above defensiveness and let truth be as it has always been: 
Sickness is a defense against the truth. I will accept the truth of what I am, and let my mind be wholly healed today.

“If you let your mind harbor [entertain] attack thoughts, yield to judgment or make plans against uncertainties to come, you have again misplaced your self, and made a bodily identity which will attack the body, for the mind is sick. Do not allow your defensiveness to hurt you longer. Do not be confused about what must be healed, Tell your self: I have forgotten what I really am, for I mistook the body for myself. Sickness is a defense against the truth. But I am not a body. And my mind cannot attack. So I can not be sick.”

- Spirit:
The Course defined ego is a thought in the mind that believes that is is separate from the Whole Mind of God. This belief runs its entire existence.  This belief is the only error that needs correction. This error in thought is corrected by the H.S. Who abides in the (right mind) within our mind. This is His only function. We need to be willing to let the error go, instead of holding onto it, like a willful child that wants its blanket or special toy. A willful child does not listen, “it wants it thus.” It thinks that it is right and knows what is good and bad for it. This also describes the ego thought that runs your world.

The ego thought has no balance. It uses conflicting messages, making the mind a confusion of thoughts balanced on a feather. One moment it will direct you to do some action and the next it directs you to stop. Contradicting thoughts are its domain and competition becomes the safe guard.  “Always look out for # one; anyone will take advantage of you, so trust no one. The corporate world is bad; the government is run by big business; the environment is dying.” With ego in charge the list goes on and on. On daily basis it directs what has value, what has importance, and what to feel threatened by. None of what it directs is true. A mistaken thought can only produce more mistakes.

9:30 p.m. (Me): I am blessed as a Son of God. and my brothers bless me. I thank my Father for His gifts to me.

10:10 p.m.: Spirit: Sara, you have come to this point to accept the mind healing that you asked for. And so it is. You are willing to let go of the thoughts that hurt, thoughts that bind the illusion to your mind. You have decided not to tolerate the unhappiness. Unhappiness is a sick belief, that hides the Will you share with and God and with Love.
As you welcome truth (happiness) so your mind is healed. As you live in joy, there is awareness of the perfection of Eternal plan, that was completed an instant ago. Living in joy brings healing to every mind.

The ego thought (sick mind) wanted to “stop,” it wanted to give up the battle it thought was real. It tried to prevent you from turning to truth, but it has failed.
You are spirit and truth prevails in all ways—- beyond all dreams.
(me: TYVM)

© 2007, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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Posted by Rev. Mary Manke.

Looking at Anger

Once again, this computer seemed to be silenced, due to a malfunctioning DSL modem. Everything is in perfect order—- even when I do not know what that order is!

Hello dear Lights,

As I continued to follow Spirit in my stay at the U.W. Hospital, I would read The Course. My thoughts this day began with looking up the possible “metaphysical” cause of lupus…. the word anger stood out to me at that moment.

L. L. Hays—“A giving up. Better to die then stand up for oneself. Anger and punishment.”  (for Lupus)
If I am angry at the world for it’s injustices to me, then I will perceive the witnesses to the insane ego system. I will perceive a world of hatred, malice and death. A world without grace, mercy or love. A world blind to the “needs” of the innocent who appear to live there.

As my anger is projected, then I believe that punishment will be returned to me. By making attack possible—- it must follow that I will be attacked.

Spirit: This is the insane thought of ego system. You do not want guilt yet the ego system is maintained only by guilt. This system will not give up guilt. It thrives and depends on guilt. This system of thought will never allow you to “see”  (perceive) the true glory that is you, your Self.               
You choose to deceive your self, to choose illusions over truth. Your power of choice will free you.  The power of your choice will lift you out of illusion.                                                   
You can receive the help from H.S. or Christ mind by simply choosing innocence.
Deceive yourself no more with images of anger and despair. Of a world condemning you in every step. You cannot attack the truth.                                                                     
There is no reason for attack.                                                                         
You can release your anger at God and the world.                                                   
This you do by no longer valuing anger and attack.
(me) Thank U God, I love U God!        H.S., help me see only innocence.  TYVM

7 am: (Me) When I give up my purpose for the world, and let H.S. show me the purpose, I free myself and my brothers from illusions. The healing of mind is the only purpose this world has. Being able to look past the forms and images, to recognize the Christ and Light within is the greatest gift I can give. By looking for innocence in everything I save the world and myself. I free my brothers from their images and my own.
In recognizing innocence (sinlessness) in all, I find my Self. I allow God’s plan to work and His Word to heal. By using His plan I am released and all the world with me.

My teacher is clear in this plan, and He knows it cannot fail. His function is done. There is no other plan that will heal all minds, banishing all thoughts of sin, separation, or guilt.
——I will follow Him, certain that His direction gives me peace.  Amen.

8:45 am; What God Values—I cannot make valueless. I cannot make my self valueless.
Spirit: You will see innocence when you want to give only peace to your brother; when you want to have your brother be happy. Only by seeing his innocence is he saved from a meaningless dream, with your self as well. Desire only his peace of mind, want his happiness and it will be yours.

Attack is not real. there is no attack in God, so there is none in you. Within its enclosed belief system, ego thought thinks it is right. It thinks attack is possible and that you can attack and have attacked. Because you can attack, it then dictates that you can be attacked from outside. It upholds it’s system with fear and guilt. It would have you attack in defense of its world. It deems that attack is justified—- whatever form it may take.
The ego believes it is right because it thinks it knows what is good or bad for you. Remember always that the ego does not know, nor will it ever know anything. When you experience the feeling of “being right” then it is certain the ego is driving your bus. It engenders the feeling that you “know” but this is not true. True knowing abides in peace and joy. When you have true knowing, you experience peace, a great relief and feeling of freedom. There is no pressure feeling, no tenseness, no judgment, no fear of being wrong.

ACIM quotes: “There is no miracle you can have unless you want it. & All healing is release from the past.”

© 2007, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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Posted by Rev. Mary Manke.

Is Ego Killing Me?

Hello Every Light, 😊

I am going to back step for this entry, as I found an interesting page in my journal from November of 2006, that seems to have significance for later events. I was not having a good day when I wrote, but I did ask Jesus for help.

(Me) I experience fear when I think I have to step off into the void. I am not even sure what the “void” is. I hold the belief that I am alone, there is no help, no support anywhere. This belief is based on “my past” that I carry and drag around with me—but this need not be. My past does not define me. The past is nothing—- it is fearful dreams and mistaken assumptions. What is not real cannot threaten, hurt or direct me.  (Ahh, but subconsciously it does those things, in my dream.)
I want to wake, not sleep.  I want to love, not fear.

Dear J.,  It appears the ego is killing me—a bit slowly—what’s the point? The pills don’t seem to help, why would I not want to heal? (This is referring to medication to reduce stomach acid.) What have I done that I need such punishment? If I am afraid of Love and Life, what is the point?       
Yes—I feel sorry for myself, I feel like a victim of my ego; it feels like I have no control, no power over the ego. You have taught that the ego idea has no power other than the belief I put into it. How do I stop believing in it?  (Answer:)

“By willingness.”
“By asking for a better way.”
“By following.”

On the following day I received these words from Spirit:  Your true Self has no ”wants”—it has no perceived needs, because It knows It has all.  The little ‘me’ is the entity that “wants” continually and is never satisfied. Do not be tricked by it’s pleas that once “you” have some thing, then it will be happy. How long does that happiness really last? Therein you allow illusion to be substituted for Love. This does nothing in Reality, but maintains your dream of separation and autonomy.

Admit or accept the truth: you did not make your self. You are not now nor ever have been self created. You chose a thought, took it seriously, and mistook it for truth. Layer after layer of guilt thoughts have covered the truth, but it is unchanged. Truth is eternal.

 

You live in Truth. Truth sustains you, nourishes you, protects you. You are part and one in Truth. Yet your belief in the opposite has made your dream seem real. Your belief in your own guilt has put a shroud over your LIght. I am with you to help you lift the curtain that seems so heavy and impenetrable. Your desire to have peace is what makes the shift possible. Your desire to be whole and offer only love, brings all assistance to you. You have all the help you need to look at the illusions of your dreams. Do not fear this. Call me consistently, listen in stillness, refuse the false gifts the little ‘me’ offers you. They may glitter and shine, but they tarnish and turn to dust as you touch them. This world holds nothing that you truly want.

 

And from another entry:  All your attempts to “fit in” or to be special have failed. That is only because the ego mind will never succeed. What has not worked or been achieved by the ego perception never was at all. What has no cause can have no effects.
You can only be an effect of Love. Only Love is real. Accept the simple truth, and fight no more. Defend no more. Be deceived no more. You are and always have been an effect and extension of Love. Thoughts leave not their source—you have not left your Source. You are perfectly safe, complete, eternal.
Do not believe the dream of sin, for it is wholly false, built on thoughts of fear and guilt. You have the truth within, shining bright beyond the clouds of guilt. You have the power to move past the clouds and see the perfection that you are.
Accept the truth and you are free.

(Me) What I am taking from this, I asked for healing in a big way; I asked to wake from the dream of guilt. My journey into the role of a body with an acute attack of dis-ease, is giving me the opportunity to look at all my unforgiven thoughts and forgving them.
TYVM! (Thank you very much)

© 2007, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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Posted by Rev. Mary Manke.

I Bless the World

Hello Every Light of Oneness,

I had these insights come to me during Physical Therapy. (Note: TYVM, equals Thank You Very Much).

I have agreed with the ego system, to make up a form in which to hide (body).
I can stop valuing this image, idol. This image has only kept me bound to guilt, trying to make illusion real, trying to make separation real.

WB 207: “I Bless the would because I bless myself.”

“Gods blessing shines upon me from within my heart, where He abides. I need only turn to Him and every sorrow melts away, as I accept His boundless Love for me.”
The unforgiving mind (ego thought) is blind. Fear is its home, fear is all that it perceives. In its perception there is no mercy, no escape from condemnation. It lives in despair unable to see beyond guilt.
The unforgiving mind seeks solutions, but never finding its release from sin. It cannot find peace, joy or innocence while it believes that separation is real. It perceives only its projected thoughts —yet these thoughts are wholly meaningless. The only thoughts with meaning are the ones you share with Love. Loving thoughts are true.

T 9.IV. pg. 168
“Atonement [perfect Love] is for all, because it is the way to undo the belief that anything is for you alone. The Atonement is a lesson in sharing, which is given you because you have forgotten how to do it. HS merely reminds you of the natural use of your abilities.”

(Me) It seems to me that my friend is concerned with the financial issues (bills, taxes, costs of things we use) his little mind (and mine) is upholding the belief that he can be attacked and suffer loss. Perhaps this comes from the beliefs that the world is extravagant, over priced, filled with money grabbers—-those who establish enormous prices for selfish gain. Yet, it seems, he misses that he has made up those rules which govern the world. These demands for payment come from his own laws. There is no out side collection agency, no administration seeking to make him “poorer,” trying to take the little he thinks he has.
Holy Spirit, my perceptions are distorted. Please help me to see this differently—for the healing of my mind, is the healing of my brother’s mind. TYVM.
I send peace to my brother, that he and I accept the truth in place of illusion. Amen.

(10:15 p.m.) I want the peace of God. I accept the peace of God.
When I forgive (my illusions, my idols, my thoughts) then I am aware of God’s peace. That is the stillness within me that no thought can touch, no dark can corner (entrap).
Holy Spirit, help me to continue accepting my answers from Love. Let me not seek outside Love for solutions. Let me recognize the problem so it can be solved. Let me recognize the problem has been solved.  TYVM.

© 2007, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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Posted by Rev. Mary Manke.

Another Chapter in the Story

Hello Every Light!

There has been a “gap” in my journal, as I began another chapter in my story of “Mary” playing on planet earth.
I have had many lessons, and opening to mind healing, which I am certain is just the beginning for me.

I seem to have begun this experience of Lupus and transverse myelitis, on July 16th, 2007. On Monday morning I couldn’t stand, I could not crawl. There was a constant tingling or buzzing from my feet up to my abdomen. Later it seemed to have crept up to just under the breasts. As I looked at my body’s “history” and at the symptoms of Lupus, I saw that I’d have had many of the signs over the years, but so sporadically, over a long span, that they could not be tied together.

I was not afraid that morning, I thought, “this is interesting.”
To me, I finely had reached the point of having had enough unhappiness (pain), so I chose this dream experience as a way to keep the ego occupied and allow space or time for me to stop all the “doing” and simply listen.
I had been asking for my mind to be healed, not sure how long or often I had asked for healing.

These are the words that Spirit gave me from date of 7/23/07: “You might call this a wake-up call. It is the accumulation of thoughts from guilt and fear of retribution. The mistaken perception that you could abandon Love and then Love would abandon you.”

“When you choose to let go of the fearful thoughts manufactured by an insane belief, then HS removes them. You have tried to unload guilt in whatever way the sick mind has offered you. You are understanding the senselessness of this. You can also understand that there is no guilt. You can and will let of the past learning (that the world deems “necessary”). You will let go of the past learning of your “own ” dream.
Your goal for the moment is to “see” the innocence and harmlessness of everything.

7/26/07: “I said before that you could call this experience a “wake-up call.”  It is a call for you to accept the Self that you are.
It is your willingness to change that has brought you here, for without this period of non-doing, you would not take the day to “study” the Course, to listen to the Voice of Love and to go within your mind.
This is a call to heal—- it is healing your mind that can save the world and your self.

“You did indeed choose this experience so that ego would be “disabled” in the physical form. You were willing to do this because you want your mind healed and are unwilling to delay your full acceptance of truth.
You have all that you “need” within your mind. Yet you have tried thousands of solutions, teachers and roads to fill your only need. Forgiveness in this world is the love that all minds in dreams seek. “Being Love” is forgiveness in this world. This is your desire to let go of the idols you made and let truth replace the dark.
(@ 3:00) I want you to accept that you are able to “hear” the Voice of Love without limit. You can hear this Voice regardless of what the body seems to do. This Voice speaks to you all the time waiting only your invitation. You have capacity to “hear” your Inner Voice, it has never dissolved. It is only your choice to listen that makes the Voice seem unreliable. Your attention is focused on the body for the moment. You can attend to the dream form, and still listen to the Voice of Love. ♥You will learn to be in the dream, but not of the dream.”

I have been reading Course Text, and Workbook, with Guidance. Then paraphrasing what stands out to me. This brings more and more clarity, more Love into my awareness.  On July 22, I woke with Course words flowing through my mind, and I came to realize that I was happy. “I am perfectly happy,” because I have no cause not to be; I am as God created me, and that must be perfect happiness.  I felt like laughing out loud! Laughing at the silliness of my little dream.

I have been told that my “job” for now, is to maintain my physical exercises each day, which is helpful in the dream world. I also know that my “job” is to be a messenger for Love, and to me, this means to communicate what I am learning or unlearning in my dream. New entries are on their way to this page!  Blessings to All. 😊

© 2007, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
You may freely share copies of this with your friends, provided this notice is included.

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Posted by Rev. Mary Manke.

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