July-September, 2023
My heart is full with gratitude to God, my Source and Inner Light that leads me from darkness to Light. I am also grateful for Pathways of Light that helps me through the classes that I am taking. I am also grateful for the holy relationship with my mentor.
I just completed three weeks of very difficult and dark times. I felt so guilty and worthless, ate very little, everything was dark and gloomy. Death would have been a wonderful gift… but I knew that the negative thoughts were all in my mind. That it is not true that I am guilty and not worthy to live. Yet the feelings felt so powerful and real. Still, in spite of the mental and emotional agony I kept doing my duty as much as I could.
I continued preparing food for my wife, and I continued breathing. I also continued meeting weekly with my mentor that leads me through the Pathways of Light Ministerial Training. I also continued volunteering and working in a local nursing home. Yet the dark feelings persisted.
Throughout this dark period there were also moments, and sometimes hours, of transcendental happiness. Many of these moments happened when I joined with groups and individuals from the local nursing home: Oak Hill Manor at Ithaca, NY.
July-September, 2023
The spring brought with it powerful storm weather in my part of the world: high winds, flying debris, heavy rains and tornado warnings. Along with these external weather patterns, I experienced a time of deep inner upheaval and purification; in other words, a swirl of ego triggers in the form of old destructive thoughts and behaviors were coming up for me to experience and either hold onto or hand over to Spirit for healing. As I watched these inner and outer storms sweep through my life, I couldn’t help but reflect upon what A Course in Miracles tells me about what I’m experiencing in every moment:
“Projection makes perception. The world you see is what you gave it, nothing more than that. But though it is no more it is not less. It is the witness to your state of mind, the outside picture of an inward condition” (T-21.In.1:1-3,5)
As I’ve studied A Course in Miracles and have become more familiar with what the above quote really means, I have come to accept that what I see “out there” in the world or in my personal life is a reflection of my own ego-driven unconscious mind and the fearful beliefs held there. The thoughts in my unconscious mind, just like the storms outside, can be frightening. They seem unpredictable and can be destructive. There is an impulse to run and hide from the seeming danger rather than face the stormy weather and learn to be at peace as it passes through.
July-September, 2023
“God’s Will for you is perfect happiness because there is no sin, and suffering is causeless.” (W-pI.101.6:1) What a statement. Don’t we live in a world of suffering? Doesn’t everyone have problems? Actually, ACIM says the answer is no. My inner Teacher tells me this book is correct.
I conclude I have needlessly decided to suffer. Who wrote the script of my life? I did along with the so-called problems. The Holy Spirit tells me that I made up the ideas of fear and guilt. Only I can decide to get rid of them. Jesus says, “I know fear is not real, but you do not.”
ACIM is about getting rid of the barriers to Love. The belief in guilt, fear, the desire for anger and grievances are my barriers, not just to love but happiness. These barriers have served the purpose of keeping me unaware of Reality. When I made the decision to think of myself as something other than the perfect, whole oneness of God, I took on the persona of a limited, needy self — a self that is lacking in love, security, and took on specialness needs. I was convinced that having my specialness needs met was my path to happiness.
I found myself dealing with the same issues year after year. Playing with this limited self, I felt righteous in being upset, and unconsciously creating suffering for myself. I believed my happiness would be achieved if the people or situations were different. The Holy Spirit corrected me, saying these people and situations are my classroom that I want and need. Jesus says what the body’s eyes see is an illusion. He also said not to deny what the body’s eyes see. It’s a clear indication of how my mind thinks and what needs to be healed. Until I was willing to see the false beliefs about my true Self, I was stuck.
July-September, 2023
Above all, I want to serve God’s plan. I want to serve it every day in every way. I know that I can because it was given me to do this. I even know how to serve His plan. All I need to do is to be vigilant for the beliefs in the mind that must be undone with the Holy Spirit’s help. I know my part.
In Lesson 23, Jesus tells us how to undo the ego: “This change requires, first, that the cause be identified and then let go, so that it can be replaced. The first two steps in this process require your cooperation. The final one does not.” (W-pI.23.5:2-4)
My part is to identify the cause, that is the belief that causes the world I see. Then, I am to let that cause, that belief, go. That’s it! That’s all I am to do. The third part is up to the Holy Spirit. Jesus goes on to say this: “Your images have already been replaced. By taking the first two steps, you will see that this is so.” (W-pI.23.5:5-6) These images we make with our beliefs have already been undone because the Holy Spirit corrected everything immediately upon the error being made.
July-September, 2023
Today I reflected on the thought of being open to the spiritual gifts of others and to reinforce this kindness through sincere encouragement. The Pathways of Light course, “Spiritual Relationship Counselor Training,” changed my direction of thinking and paved my way for a miracle of a new perspective.
This course provided me with the learning and techniques to ask open-ended questions that have more than a yes-no answer to help me dig deeper into my relationships for a greater understanding of the person. This helps me give grace and accept what the person gives from their heart. I remember: No expectations, no judgment. Each person has their own set of personal tapes from their past playing in their mind that influences behaviors and reactions, just as I have my own tapes.
Recently, I found myself in the old role of Ego-in-Chief when I was talking to a relative. I started to feel that I had the answers which led me to give advice based on my limited knowledge. Luckily, I stopped myself when I started hearing the “you should…” I remembered that ego is in charge with this type of thinking.
I stepped back and took a moment to go to Holy Spirit and ask for a change of perspective to return to my true Self. I took a deep breath for eight counts, breathing in and then gave myself a slower breathing out pace with 12 counts and repeated this exercise five times.
July-September, 2023
We cannot give peace a home and believe in a world of separation from God’s oneness at the same time. We give peace a home by accepting the reality of Love’s oneness as the only Identity that exists. We give peace a home as we are willing to accept God’s Will, and not try to replace God’s Will of oneness with the belief in separation.
Conflict comes with choosing to see separation from our Identity through identifying with the body’s physical senses. As long as we insist on making what bodies do and say real, we are choosing to make peace homeless because peace and separation, like oil and water, are opposites in every way.
On Text page 76 Jesus tells us, “You are the Kingdom of Heaven, but you have let the belief in darkness enter your mind and so you need a new light. The Holy Spirit is the radiance that you must let banish the idea of darkness. His is the glory before which dissociation falls away, and the Kingdom of Heaven breaks through into its own.” (T-5.II.4:1-3)
July-September, 2023
After spending 15 weeks in Florida as a snowbird, I returned to my home on the south shore of Long Island in late April.
Although the high school lacrosse season was already two months old, I have joined the coaching staff as a volunteer coach for the final month of the season. I have served as a coach in some capacity for the Lynbrook Owls for the past 50 years.
This year, however, has been a little different for me. There have been some changes in the coaching staff and, although I am still welcomed back from my extended vacation in Florida, it took little time for me to see that the voices of authority were now different.
My ego was challenged by this. I no longer had the same comfortable role with the new coaches. I felt my voice was no longer needed, even though I was treated with warmth and respect when I first arrived. The team was struggling and the coaches were at their wits end in trying to right the ship.
July-September, 2023
I do not normally calculate in my mind how much gas I am going to get for a certain amount of money I give the attendant. When gas hit $3.00/gallon, I gave the attendant $30.00 and because the math was so easy, I expected ten gallons of fuel. The pump stopped at eight gallons. Clearly displayed was the $30.00 I had given for the gas. I asked for $6.00 back or two more gallons of gas and was refused. I had not pressed the button for a higher grade of fuel. I left feeling unfairly treated. It was only a few dollars, but my ego would not let it go until the next morning when I read my daily lesson. This is the time of day that determines how the rest of the day will look.
Why was I holding on to this grievance? The answer came that I valued being the victim, seeing myself as vulnerable and unfairly treated, more than I valued peace. A Course in Miracles tells us ”The ego’s plan is to have you see error clearly first, and then overlook it. Yet how can you overlook what you have made real?” (T-9.IV.4:4-5) I had focused on seeing “error clearly first.” Judgment was made as I esteemed the story as reality.
July-September, 2023
When you reach out to another,
you are reaching in to you.
So all you do for others,
you also do for you.
All that you may ask of me,
you ask for me and you.
And all that you are giving me,
you also give to you.
The gifts that you have given,
are always with you still.
Your cup is never empty,
It’s always being filled.
All that you give another,
is also given you.
All your thoughts…
and all your words…
and all that you may do.
July-September, 2023
Here is a song that brought me much enjoyment through the years and that I played for a Sunday school. As time went by the meaning of this hymn grew and brought me to a place of being ready to open to my true Self.
Song: “His Eye Is On the Sparrow”
Why should I feel discouraged,
And why should the shadows come?
Why should my heart feel lonely,
And long for Heaven and Home?
When Jesus is my portion,
A constant friend is He,
Oh, His eye is on the sparrow
Oh yes, I know He watches over me.
This past year I have been concentrating on opening to the Presence of Love, this real, genuine Presence that A Course in Miracles tells me about. It sounds so good and I’m told that I’m worthy and deserving of such a thing. So I’m surrendering every chance I have to this loving Presence.
July-September, 2023
Many of us have heard the phrase, “It’s 5 o’clock somewhere,” referring to “happy hour” at a bar nearby. Well, I am happy to have the perception of time, given by Holy Spirit, that it is 1:11 (One, One, One) at all times, everywhere and that no matter what a clock spells out, this is always the truth.
Time is now to return to the oneness that we all are — one Self, united with our Creator. It is a miracle to be aware of this and entails no effort or strain, only willingness to be inspired by Holy Spirit, Whose Voice we can count on 24/7.
I have been aware of so many miracles lately, and this morning Holy Spirit offered me an option. He said that I don’t necessarily need a grievance to reveal the miracle hidden within, but that I can be reminded of my miracle-mindedness (actually inherent in our One Mind of only Love and peace) in a new way. He suggested that I can let ANYthing and EVERYthing I might be aware of remind me of miracles, if I so choose.
July-September, 2023
Somewhere along the way, whether intentionally or unintentionally, we are taught that to get ahead, we must be shrewd, a shark, “at the ready,” cut-throat even, in order to make it to the top. Somehow, someway, this earthly mentality seeps in from the outside world.
For some, the idea doesn’t shape who they are and it doesn’t define or rule their way of being, but for others, it becomes heavily ingrained into who they are. They are scared to be vulnerable, associating it with looking weak. They always have their armor up, ready to defend and attack. To exert their power. To dominate.
But there is another way — a way that lightens our step, unburdens our gait and makes smooth our road. As we walk along this road… the Holy Spirit’s path for us, one that is softer and gentler, we are shown a whole new world.
July-September, 2023
I wanted to share about listening to the truth by listening to Holy Spirit. I’m not sure the truth can actually be put into words. In fact, I know it can’t.
One time my Muskogee Creek teacher told me that that’s why we call it the Great Mystery. But there’s a certain experience of Truth, isn’t there? We all know It when we feel It. And our experience is more important than our intellectual understanding.
There are two lessons from A Course in Miracles that stand out to me on this topic. Lessons 106 and 107 if you want to read them later. I like to put the two keynote ideas from these lessons together like this: “Let me be still and listen to the truth because the truth will correct all errors in my mind.” These lessons remind me of Psalm 46:10, “Be still and know that I am God.”
April-June, 2023
April-June, 2023
We have discovered over the years that whenever we think we are separate and alone, we are thinking with the mistaken ego mind. The ego is the false idea of being separate from our Creator. The ego mind always defends against Love’s oneness. It thinks that its job is to judge everyone and everything it sees.
A Course in Miracles has taught us to be mindful of when ego (false separate identity) thoughts come up and take these thoughts to the Holy Spirit to receive another way of seeing. The Holy Spirit sees the truth of everyone’s unity instead of the ego’s judgmental thoughts. The ego is never at peace because it is in a constant battle with Love’s oneness.
Because Jesus has already completed the journey Home, he knows that he is not alone nor is he separate from us. He asks us to join with him in God’s Love so we can learn we are not alone. As we join with him, we invite all our brothers to join with us, as Jesus does. Knowing that we are not alone, we offer all that we learn to everyone and our strength grows. We become aware that… “The whole power of God’s Son lies in all of us, but not in any of us alone.” (T-8.VI.8:5)
Jesus tells us we cannot return to the Kingdom alone because we cannot be alone. Thinking we are alone is a denial of God’s Will and makes us unaware of What we are. To return to the awareness of What we are, we need to accept our oneness with our brothers. “We begin the journey back by setting out together, and gather in our brothers as we continue together. Every gain in our strength is offered for all, so they too can lay aside their weakness and add their strength to us.” (T-8.VI.1:2-3)
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