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October-December, 2012

From Heartbreak to Happiness

by Rev. Dennis Flynn, O.M.C.

In April 2011, I ended a relationship with a woman I was deeply in love with. I met her in 2008 while I was going through a painful divorce with my ex-wife. And in spite of all the rational reasons why I should not have pursued another relationship during that difficult period, my ego craved the coddling, attention and affection of a “special relationship.”

Needless to say, the relationship was doomed from the start. I was attracted to her to be sure and we did enjoy a deep and fulfilling romance. But having gone through the pain and dissolution of a marriage, I was simply unable to open myself and completely trust her.

Loving her wasn’t the problem. My loving me was.

In the few months prior to the breakup, I stumbled upon Pathways of Light. I had been reading the Workbook of A Course in Miracles and I was interested in studying the material further. I enrolled and started taking the correspondence courses. But while I began to experience the self-healing from the Holy Spirit, it was not enough to salvage our fragile relationship. So I released her to find someone who could give her what I didn’t think I was yet capable of giving. Although it was a painful break-up, it was a peaceful one filled with mutual admiration, understanding and respect. And we did stay in touch with each other over the following year.

The Pathways of Light course studies facilitated the healing of my broken heart and eventually culminated in my ordination as a Pathways of Light minister in January 2012. I was thriving. I had done considerable healing work on myself and accomplished a personal goal of becoming ordained.

And then in May 2012 she called me to ask for relationship advice. My heart sunk. My ego was bruised. My spirit crushed. Although I had released her, I never really let her go. And now it felt like I was losing her all over again. I felt a pain in my chest, a weight in my stomach and an ache in my bones. And sleep would not rescue me from my grief.

And then I did everything contrary to what A Course in Miracles teaches. I reacted. I attacked. I defended. I retaliated. I demeaned her. I questioned her motives. I ridiculed her “issues.”

And then I felt guilty. Horribly, terribly guilty.

So, I called upon the Holy Spirit for help. And June 1, I received my answer: “No one can suffer loss unless it be his own decision. No one suffers pain except his choice elects this state for him. No one can grieve nor fear nor think him sick unless these are the outcomes that he wants.” (W-pI.152.1:1-3)

Further on, “The power of decision is our own. And we accept of him that which we are, and humbly recognize the Son of God. To recognize God’s Son implies as well that all self-concepts have been laid aside, and recognized as false.” (W-pI.152:10:1-3)

A Course in Miracles describes a miracle as a change in perception. And that is exactly what happened.

I made a conscious choice to see her differently than the pain in my heart was projecting. I recognized her as the Son of God. I realized she isn’t her “issues.” None of us are. She is, and always was, perfect. And I told her so.

I told her many things since then. We talked a lot over the next several weeks. And on July 20 we went on a date.

We have been seeing each other ever since…

Rev. Dennis Flynn, O.M.C., is a Pathways of Light minister living in Haddonfield, New Jersey

© 2012, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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October-December, 2012

Holy Spirit, I Am Here

by Rev. Myron Jones, O.M.C.

Through my study of A Course in Miracles, I learned that when I didn’t know what to do to be happy, I could ask the Holy Spirit for help and He would guide me to the right action. Often, when I brought my fears and doubts or my wrong-minded thinking to Him and in faith would ask that my mind be healed, all my distress would dissolve away and peace would take its place.

These were miraculous moments. I began to do this more and more until there were fewer instances of stubbornness, where I thought I didn’t need help. The practice itself brought new conviction to my words and a stronger desire for a healed mind. Then it seemed that I was doing this almost without any gaps at all, watching my mind for thoughts that were not of God, asking the Holy Spirit to correct my thinking and heal my mind.

In spite of my progress, it seemed that no matter how hard I tried, I could not move any further. I could not be free of ego and yet, it seemed I should be able to do that. I often had the thought, “I let go of this thought, but I am not there yet.” “There” was an elusive state of being, my goal, but a goal I seemed never quite worthy to meet. I had the feeling that I needed to do more, work harder, then all the conditions would be met and I would be happy. I would be different. I would be “there.”

It is so easy to become confused about my role in this awakening process. I set out with the intention of learning to follow Holy Spirit’s guidance and to step back and allow Him to heal my mind, but without realizing it I decided on my own what my goal was and how I must meet that goal. I decided that my mind must be free of ego thinking. Having set that as my goal, I then judged myself for failing to meet it.

This is the ego way of preserving itself; establish a solution that cannot succeed. Innocence is a condition of freedom so I cannot be free because I judge myself as guilty. I couldn’t figure out what to do next. I knew that I could step aside completely, that I could allow the Holy Spirit to lead at all times, not just when I decided I needed His guidance, but I didn’t know how.

What I did know is that I am meant to be free and I knew that consistent and persistent desire would eventually get me “there.” I just kept asking the Holy Spirit to help me. The Holy Spirit answers in many ways. Sometimes it comes as a whisper into my Heart. Sometimes I finally hear what a teacher is saying, or read the words I need in a book. This time, my sister stepped forward to offer me her hand and to walk me out of doubt and into certainty.

Through her, the Holy Spirit told me that I could just “be” where I longed to be. The message she came to deliver was that there was no place to go, that I was already there. She told me the same thing over and over in different words. She waited patiently for my acceptance until I finally said yes. All along, all I needed to be there was to accept that I was.

If I were to describe how it was different, I would say that, instead of continually stepping aside and allowing the Holy Spirit to lead when I was in trouble, I simply stepped aside. Now He is at the helm. He is the unwavering Presence in my mind. Even when I have moments of confusion, I am never confused about that. I know that the only thing that happens to cause the confusion is that I am looking out at the world through the ego’s eyes. It means nothing and I stop. I laugh when I think how in the past I made this seem so hard.

Holy Spirit, this change in the way I feel is miraculous. What would you have me know about this?

Holy Spirit: You do not need to know how this works, and it would not be possible to completely explain this in words. Your desire and acceptance are what is needed to allow this to happen. From desire it flows naturally and will flow until impeded by non-acceptance.

Me: Is this like when I desired to know who I was, but could not believe I was ready? 

Holy Spirit: Yes. Your doubt was the block that kept the process stalled. In a holy instant, born of desire and faith, you joined with your sister in purpose and what you call a “shift” occurred. Do you recall doing anything to make this happen? 

Me: No. I simply said, “Yes.” Everything else just happened. After that there was still doubt in my mind, but it was like a shadow, there but not there. I felt like waiting to see what would happen, knowing that what would happen would be perfect and the timing would be perfect. It was joyful. 

Holy Spirit: Now you must protect your decision by making it again daily. You will find this effortless and just as joyful if you dedicate a few moments of time each morning and each evening for this purpose. Do not feel the pressure to do something in those moments. Your desire to give that time is all that is needed. The rest will be done for you. 

I see that in the past I have often forgotten that very important part; it will be done for me. I don’t need to make anything happen, and I don’t need to make myself worthy. My worthiness has already been established by God in my creation. All that seems to be required of me is that I desire it fully, and that I accept it. 

Holy Spirit, I am here.

Rev. Myron Jones, O.M.C., is a Pathways of Light minister living in Lake Charles, Louisiana. Read more of her inspiring Healing Journal articles on the Pathways website.  Myron’s website is:
http://www.forgivenessisthewayhome.org
Note: Be sure to see Rev. Myron Jones and Rev. Larry Glenz at the 2013 Chicago ACIM Conference, where they will be the speakers representing Pathways of Light.

© 2012, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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October-December, 2012

Tending Bar with Spirit’s Help

by Rev. Larry Glenz, O.M.C.

I don’t know how many combination Ordained Ministerial Counselor / bartenders there are in the world — but I am one. Some have said that it is certainly an odd mix; others have said they see how the two vocations dovetail beautifully. ACIM has taught me that it does not matter what you do in the world of form. What is important is with which teacher you choose to do it.

When I was a younger man in the 1980’s and 90’s, I tended bar on Sundays at a sports bar in NY on the south shore of Long Island. Sunday was my day off from being a history teacher and coach of three sports. The part-time bartender job helped to pay the bills and seemed to also enhance my social life.

Since my retirement from teaching over four years ago, I have devoted myself to being a Pathways of Light minister. It is my passion and I have the time and means to do it. I have also taken on two shifts as the bartender of the Swiss Tavern — a local restaurant in the same village where I taught school.

You meet all kinds of personalities in the bar business. It’s a perfect job for practicing non-judgment, for seeing only sinlessness in my brother. Sooner or later, a bartender is bound to face a troublesome customer — perhaps several. My attitude towards this is so much different now than it was in my pre-ACIM bartending days. But I still have to catch myself — an aggressive drinker can become a big “button-pusher.” Forgiveness opportunities abound!

There have been a few occasions when I have forgotten that the customer in front of me is the Perfect Child of God. A New York bar is not the place to be always gentle when a customer is misbehaving or bothering our other patrons. But putting the Holy Spirit in charge of my actions is always the right thing to do — no matter what the circumstances.

A frightening bully, an angry wife, a mentally ill senior, an inebriated young beauty — all have to be dealt with appropriately for the business to succeed as a place where people will go for food, drink, and enjoyment. Some difficult situations will certainly arise. Sometimes, in the so-called heat of battle, I have remembered to say to Holy Spirit, “You are in charge of what I say and do now.” When I remember to do that, my confidence level goes way up. Perhaps the people involved sense that and I have a more calming yet stronger presence than I would otherwise, left to my own ego devices.

Back in the day as a younger bartender I didn’t even try to use a Guide Who could never steer me in the wrong direction. I remember some of those situations ended ugly. I am so grateful that I have a Guide now — so grateful that it is no longer up to me to fix anything without the help of the One that cannot make a mistake.

Whether behind the bar or in any other situation, I just need to remember to pause, step back, step aside, and let Inspiration take charge. All the things that are taking place in our lives are the perfect curriculum for our learning process. The more challenging the situation appears, the greater the opportunity to learn the power of true forgiveness.

I will still need some way to get the troublesome customer out of the bar. But turning to my Inner Guide can be more effective than a pair of 300 lb. bouncers to do the work. This holds true for all of life’s challenges. And I’m grateful, Holy Spirit, for the lessons.

Rev. Larry Glenz, O.M.C., is a Pathways of Light minister living in Long Beach, New York.
Note: Be sure to see Rev. Myron Jones and Rev. Larry Glenz at the 2013 Chicago ACIM Conference, where they will be the speakers representing Pathways of Light.

© 2012, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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October-December, 2012

The One About the Secret

by Rev. Stephan Mead, O.M.C.

It seems a constant flow of comments and insights this past year have been on the subject of “waking up.” I can almost dare you to go to an ACIM internet board or ACIM Facebook posting and not find that elusive goal discussed. “What is waking up? What does one need to do to get out of the dream?” And, if it’s so easy to do, “Why haven’t more people, even the supposedly spiritual giants done it?” If one does actually “wake up,” how would he know it? What changes? Who would you hang out with in the land of enlightenment? Do people actually “wake up” or is it just something to discuss with others as we live out our lives?

This past year I probably asked myself most if not all of those questions. I also noticed that just claiming to be interested in “waking up” gave me the feeling of being on the same team as so many of my friends. Unfortunately, I also found that talking about being awakened and being awakened are two different things, and one does not automatically lead to the other.

In my hundreds of conversations about the phenomenon of “being awake,” (mostly with my mighty companion Nancy, sorry honey) I finally arrived at a question I thought very pertinent. “What would be the advantage to me to wake up?” Currently my life is pretty much without drama. I have plenty of work, plenty of money, great companionship and a fabulous relationship with my grown children. (Admittedly, my relationship with the kids may have been helped by a trip to Maui this November that I’m treating them to.) Anyway, why upset the apple cart? I’ve had plenty of misery in the past, and as long as my present stays much like it is, won’t my future be filled with happiness?

As usual, my ego is ever ready to assist and guide me in a particular way of looking at life. The problem is, I am assured in every spiritual book, every teaching and even from the quiet voice in my heart that my ego inspired game plan for life will cause me to suffer. Damn! Okay, now I’ve answered my own question. I want to wake up because I don’t want to suffer any more. However spiritually shallow that reason may be, it feels like the truth to me now, so onward to the “waking up” business.

In ACIM T-27.VIII.10, we are told, “The secret of salvation [waking up] is but this: That you are doing this unto yourself.” Then in the next paragraph we are promised, “This single lesson learned will set you free from suffering…”

These two paragraphs identified the “secret” to me. So now that I know the secret… what???

I am not a new student of the Course. I have been immersed in its teachings for years, and cannot recall a time when just a few sentences have affected me more. Could living a suffering free life be any easier? All I have to do is learn a single lesson, “I am doing everything to myself?” That’s it? That is the lesson I must learn to awaken? It just doesn’t seem all that difficult. I can learn this lesson!

In closing, I’ve been contemplating why this lesson is such a secret anyway. People have been telling me this my whole life!

Love to all! Stephan.

Rev. Stephan Mead, O.M.C., is a Pathways of Light minister living in Seattle, Washington.

© 2012, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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