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Study of the Text, B. To Have Peace, Teach Peace to Learn It, Paragraph 4. 1-22-14

B. To Have Peace, Teach Peace to Learn It, Paragraph 4
4 Upside down as always, the ego perceives the first lesson as insane. In fact, this is its only alternative since the other possibility, which would be much less acceptable to it, would obviously be that it is insane. The ego’s judgment, here as always, is predetermined by what it is. The fundamental change will still occur with the change of mind in the thinker. Meanwhile, the increasing clarity of the Holy Spirit’s Voice makes it impossible for the learner not to listen. For a time, then, he is receiving conflicting messages and accepting both.

I accept that the ego is insane and so I accept that “to have, give all to all” must be true as it is the opposite of what the ego tells me. The ego insists that to have I must take, and I must defend what I take.  At first, I accepted the Holy Spirit’s lesson in blind faith and without a lot of enthusiasm because I didn’t really believe it. But because I was willing to believe it, the Voice for God became stronger in my mind, my willingness grew, and so did my understanding. As my understanding grew, so did the motivation for change.

Here is an example of how this works in my life. I teach, facilitate, counsel, and perform weddings and other functions as a minister. I do this on Friday evenings, Saturdays, Sundays and Monday evenings. I also work full time during the week. The ego mind sometimes insists that I am giving too much of my time and that it is exhausting me.

If I listen to that old line, I start to feel tired and think I should cut back on what I do in my ministry. But I don’t do that because I recognize the ego voice when I hear it and I no longer trust it. Instead I ask Spirit what it is He would have me do and then I do it. What happens is that I take the next call and teach the next class. As I do this my energy rises to meet the need and I am infused with peace and happiness.

I love what I do and it is never a burden. It is only the ego that thinks to give is to lose. I have learned that I will feel tired if I listen to the ego and energetic if I listen to Spirit. It has become clear to me that it is not what I do that makes me tired, but rather it is what I believe that saps my energy, just as it is that accepting the Holy Spirit’s lesson to give all to all fills me with energy.

I am still allowing my understanding to expand around this idea. It is so completely opposite to what I have taught myself through the ego that I still default to ego thinking that I am poor indeed and must hoard the little I have. The conflicting messages are not as disruptive as they used to be, though, because while I still hear the ego, I hear the Holy Spirit more clearly, and I am increasingly willing to believe only that Voice. I have discovered that listening to ego leads to chaos and depression, while listening to Spirit leads to peace.

© 2014, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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Study of the Text A. To Have Peace, Teach Peace to Learn It, Paragraph 3   1-21-14

B. To Have Peace, Teach Peace to Learn It, Paragraph 3
3 The first step in the reversal or undoing process is the undoing of the getting concept. Accordingly, the Holy Spirit’s first lesson was “To have, give all to all.” I said that this is apt to increase conflict temporarily, and we can clarify this still further now. At this point, the equality of having and being is not yet perceived. Until it is, having appears to be the opposite of giving. Therefore, the first lesson seems to contain a contradiction, since it is being learned by a conflicted mind. This means conflicting motivation, and so the lesson cannot be learned consistently as yet. Further, the mind of the learner projects its own conflict, and thus does not perceive consistency in the minds of others, making him suspicious of their motivation. This is the real reason why, in many respects, the first lesson is the hardest to learn. Still strongly aware of the ego in yourself, and responding primarily to the ego in others, you are being taught to react to both as if what you do believe is not true.

Having does appear to be the opposite of giving to us who still believe in separation. I give freely and in my sanest moments I give without a thought of loss. But I am not yet always sane and sometimes I give but it is out of sacrifice and in fear. I always support those whose words of wisdom support me. I do this out of love and appreciation. I do it so that they will be able to continue to give their time and effort to helping us wake up. But when I am afraid of loss, even these gifts are given grudgingly.

When this happens, when I forget Who my Source is and I begin to believe in loss and lack, I don’t try to fix that feeling by adjusting my finances, by cutting out nonessentials and deciding who I can afford to support and who I have to take off my list. Instead, I search my mind for signs of confusion about lack and loss. I ask the Holy Spirit for help to see clearly, and I ask for and accept the Atonement for my mistaken beliefs.

If appearances indicate lack or loss in my life, it is not because I am giving too much away, it is because I have forgotten who I am. The error needs correction on the level of cause. What I have discovered is that when I fall into the ego belief of lack, fear arises and acting from that fear I begin to project my “problem” on the world. I start to think the problem is that I am too generous or too carless with my money. I begin to resent the ones who are the beneficiaries of my gifts, as if they are the cause of the change in my mind.

If I continue to give out of a sense of obligation without allowing my mind to be healed, the problem will just get worse because I am conflicted. I am motivated to give out of fearlessness not because I have all, but because I am all. But I am also motivated to give out of obligation, which is fearful, stemming as it does from the belief I am limited and giving depletes me.

This is equally true when giving takes other forms such as giving my time and effort, my affection and trust. I have an unlimited supply of everything because I am unlimited. However, when I identify with the body/personality, which is the personification of limits, I become uncomfortable with giving, believing it is the same as loss. The solution is never going to be to further limit my giving which will serve to further convince myself that I am limited. The solution is to allow the mind to be corrected. This can be a very simple process.

Sometimes I will have some personal project I want to complete and I will feel conflicted about my obligations. Something that was a joy just moments ago begins to feel like a burden. Instead of giving into that feeling, I recognize that I don’t know what is important for me to do, and I don’t know what should happen in this situation. I gladly step aside and trust the Holy Spirit to arrange things for me. Sometimes the most amazing things happen, but always I am instantly at peace and somehow time stretches to accommodate my needs.

The only reason it seems hard to understand that “to have, give all to all,” makes sense is because we forget who we are. We are All and we give only to ourselves even as the part of our selves we give to seems separate from us. Within the parameters of separation, giving creates a loss, but we are not that. We are not separate and as we learn to teach wholeness, we learn to believe in wholeness.

© 2014, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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Study of the Text, B. To Have Peace, Teach Peace to Learn It, Paragraph 2. 1-20-14

B. To Have Peace, Teach Peace to Learn It, Paragraph 2
2 All good teachers realize that only fundamental change will last, but they do not begin at that level. Strengthening motivation for change is their first and foremost goal. It is also their last and final one. Increasing motivation for change in the learner is all that a teacher need do to guarantee change. Change in motivation is a change of mind, and this will inevitably produce fundamental change because the mind is fundamental.

My motivation for everything was to be happy and I used to think my happiness was predicated on winning. I wanted to make more money than others. I wanted others to look on me with envy and wish they were like me. When I was a teenager I would fantasize coming back to my old neighborhood as a famous and rich person and everyone would see me and wish they had been my friends while they had the chance. Mostly they would wish they were me.

This desire to win showed up in all sorts of ways. I would want to be the one to win the argument. I wanted to win the argument more than I wanted to love the other person or to be happy. More to the fact, I thought being happy meant winning the argument. I wanted my child to be the smartest and most attractive. I wanted my husband to be the envy of all my friends. I was the center of the universe and I thought that everything revolved around me. What I wanted was the only thing that mattered, and I thought I knew what I wanted.

I still want to be happy. But now my motivation for happiness has changed. I am no longer motivated by the desire to win because I see that winning doesn’t provide true happiness. If I win, I may feel a momentary surge of adrenaline but that’s all. It quickly wanes and as the pendulum swings back, I feel the loss of that adrenaline surge as loss of happiness. What I have discovered is that the loss goes much deeper than no longer feeling the brief elation of winning.

In order for me to win, someone else had to lose. I discovered that this was the problem; the reason happiness evaded me no matter how many times I won. I had discovered a new motivation. I wanted to know I was One again. I wanted to remember my true nature, to join with my brothers and so know I was One with my Creator. I wanted to wake up from this sad dream of separation.

At first, I tried to cling to my old motivation while embracing my new motivation. I would win and feel momentarily elated, and then I would feel bad because winning meant losing. I couldn’t have both the win and the happiness. I started to look at things differently and I realized that the joy I felt in joining was so much more satisfying and long-lived than the happiness of winning. In fact, winning no longer felt happy to me when it meant my brother had to lose.

Everything changed when my motivation changed. I lost my interest in competitive games. I lost interest in making the most money and in winning arguments. I lost interest in arguments altogether. Instead of trying to win an argument, I became interested in what we had in common. I began to want for my brother what I wanted for myself, and seeing him happy made me happy. When my motivation changed my life changed in a fundamental way. The change was in my mind, and the change of mind created a change in behavior that changed my life.

© 2014, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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Study of the Text,B. To Have Peace, Teach Peace to Learn It, Paragraph 1. 1-17-14

B. To Have Peace, Teach Peace to Learn It
1 All who believe in separation have a basic fear of retaliation and abandonment. They believe in attack and rejection, so that is what they perceive and teach and learn. These insane ideas are clearly the result of dissociation and projection. What you teach you are, but it is quite apparent that you can teach wrongly, and can therefore teach yourself wrong. Many thought I was attacking them, even though it was apparent I was not. An insane learner learns strange lessons. What you must recognize is that when you do not share a thought system, you are weakening it. Those who believe in it therefore perceive this as an attack on them. This is because everyone identifies himself with his thought system, and every thought system centers on what you believe you are. If the center of the thought system is true, only truth extends from it. But if a lie is at its center, only deception proceeds from it.

Because I believe in separation I have a basic fear of relation and abandonment. I see that this is true and as long as I continue to believe in this I will teach it through my behavior and through my thoughts. This will reinforce the belief for myself and for others. However, knowing that this belief is in my mind, and knowing that I want my mind to be healed is helpful. I can watch my mind for thoughts that reflect these beliefs and ask for healing.

The whole point of this life is to use it to wake up from the belief in separation, so I don’t want to teach separation through teaching retaliation and abandonment. In order to stop teaching it, I must first realize when I am doing it. So I stay vigilant for this kind of thinking and its projections.

One example I can think of is the belief I sometimes have that someone I care about does not love me. For instance, I will start to miss my daughter and realize I haven’t heard from her in a while. I will text or call and maybe she won’t answer her phone or the text. Then I might start to worry that she is mad at me about something I said or failed to do. I start to think that she is too sensitive and it’s easy to offend her. If I stay with this long enough I will begin to resent her.

If I question this, I see that the only thing that happened is that I miss my daughter and she did not return my call. Everything else is something that I thought based on the belief in abandonment. I believe I can be abandoned and so I project a story of abandonment. I don’t even need the abandonment to actually happen; I can simply perceive that it happened. If I stay with the story soon I am projecting guilt onto her and if I don’t stop my crazy thinking I might start to plan my retaliation. “Fine, if she doesn’t want to talk to me, I don’t want to talk to her.”

Fortunately, I am not that insane anymore, but I can still torture myself with unquestioned beliefs for a long time before I come to my senses. If I don’t allow my thinking to be corrected, I am probably going to teach abandonment and retaliation in some way even if it is subtle. My mom used to be really fond of doing this through martyring herself and expecting us to accept the guilt for her suffering. I catch myself doing this sometimes, too, just mentioning casually that I had been concerned when I didn’t hear back from her right away.

When I hear myself say that kind of thing, I know that I have fallen for the ego again. I don’t want to teach this, but I will do so until I accept healing for the belief driving it. I cannot be abandoned, and therefore I never need to retaliate. There is a lot of ego resistance to this lesson. I cannot break this ugly cycle from within the belief system, but I can accept help from outside it. That is why I have the Holy Spirit, and I call on Him to correct my thinking and to undo what I have done.

© 2014, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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Study of the Text, A. To Have, Give All to All, Paragraph 6. 1-16-14

A. To Have, Give All to All, Paragraph 6
6 This is a very preliminary step, and the only one you must take for yourself. It is not even necessary that you complete the step yourself, but it is necessary that you turn in that direction. Having chosen to go that way, you place yourself in charge of the journey, where you and only you must remain. This step may appear to exacerbate conflict rather than resolve it, because it is the beginning step in reversing your perception and turning it right-side up. This conflicts with the upside-down perception you have not yet abandoned, or the change in direction would not have been necessary. Some remain at this step for a long time, experiencing very acute conflict. At this point they may try to accept the conflict, rather than take the next step towards its resolution. Having taken the first step, however, they will be helped. Once they have chosen what they cannot complete alone, they are no longer alone.

Jesus says that what he is telling us is going to conflict with the upside- down perception we have not yet abandoned. So I am looking at what it is I think now. My thinking is no longer completely upside down, but even the thinking that I have abandoned for the most part, shows up in certain circumstances.

Upside-down thinking: I am a body and the body is real. The body and many things in the world determine my destiny and affect my everyday life in ways I cannot control. I am alone in the world, and even when I try to join with others there is an element of fear and uncertainty because of the inevitable competition that arises when one believes they are separate. There is only so much love, and so much things and I have to get mine regardless of what is left for others.

The thinking toward which I am being led: The body and the world are an illusion, the effects of wrong-minded thinking. I am neither a body nor am I in a body. I am one with all there is and one with God. I am powerful beyond measure and perfect in every way. I am part of God and in God and therefore eternal and safe. There is no loss nor lack and therefore no need for competition. No matter how much I give, I can never be without. There is no separation, my brother and I are one with each other and therefore I can only give to myself. I can know these things are true only as I give all to all.

In other words, I know who I am by stepping into who I am.

That’s about it in a nutshell. It is easy to see that while I hold onto any vestige of my upside-down thinking, the truth is going to seem like nonsense. And that is at best, because it is also going to seem threatening. When I felt like there was only a very limited amount of anything, I clung to what I had and sharing felt like a sacrifice. The idea of giving all to all was just crazy.

When I look back on my overly long journey through this Course, I am amazed that I ever made it this far. I was so afraid of everything and guilt was my constant belief. I was guilty in my mind for everything and the guilt I couldn’t bear, I projected onto others. No one was safe from my attacks. I was that afraid.

However, in spite of my fear and guilt, I turned in that direction. I turned and stayed turned. For a long time, that was all I could do. But I was not alone and my Help was constant and strong, and eventually, I become more consistent and stronger. I am not through yet. I still believe in me a bit.

Eventually that “me” will fall away. I don’t know when and it is not my job to do anything about that. I am in charge of my journey in that every step of the way is a choice I make, but I am not generally aware of the part of my mind that makes this decision. For now, my awareness is primarily focused on Myron and her story, and that is where I see the effects of my change of mind and so am motivated to continue my awakening, receiving help and guidance to do what I cannot do alone.

© 2014, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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Study of the Text,A. To Have, Give All to All, Paragraph 5. 1-15-14

A. To Have, Give All to All, Paragraph 5
5 The Holy Spirit, Who leads to God, translates communication into being, just as He ultimately translates perception into knowledge. You do not lose what you communicate. The ego uses the body for attack, for pleasure and for pride. The insanity of this perception makes it a fearful one indeed. The Holy Spirit sees the body only as a means of communication, and because communicating is sharing it becomes communion. Perhaps you think that fear as well as love can be communicated; and therefore can be shared. Yet this is not so real as it may appear. Those who communicate fear are promoting attack, and attack always breaks communication, making it impossible. Egos do join together in temporary allegiance, but always for what each one can get separately. The Holy Spirit communicates only what each one can give to all. He never takes anything back, because He wants you to keep it. Therefore, His teaching begins with the lesson:
To have, give all to all.

I don’t need to be convinced that I misuse the body. I often misuse it. I want it to present to the world this strong willed person who is in charge of her life. That is why I spent so much of my life trying to mold it into what I perceived as a body that represented this image I wanted to project. I tried to keep it a certain shape and size.

I wanted my hair to look like the shampoo models and my skin to be smooth and flawless like the make-up models. I can’t tell you the time, money and effort spent toward this goal. Even if I could have achieved it, what would I have really achieved, anyway? That I am the maker of my self? That I am a better maker of self than others? Is that communication? Or is that separation?

I seem to be losing my desire to misuse my body. It is not a done deal, yet, but I feel differently about it now and I am looking forward to seeing how this unfolds. I am no longer obsessed with my weight, though I haven’t completely lost interest in it. I used to stand in front of the mirror and wonder what I could do with this body to make it more appealing, to attract people to me. Now I sometimes forget to look at all and at the end of the day realize I didn’t comb my hair. Looking for some balance here. Ha ha.

I am now a lot more interested in using the body for true communication and though I don’t understand this completely, I know I will because it is God’s Will and now it is my will, too. I spend some time each morning working in my journal and sharing what I get. I think maybe this is true communication because there is no ulterior motive. I don’t do it to look holy or to prove I am a better student or more spiritual than someone else. I do it because that is what I am supposed to do. I do it out of love.

I communicate during the day when I see past someone’s behavior to the Christ within. I communicate when I respond to attack, not with defense, but with compassion and understanding. I communicate when I express love to whoever is in front of me or in my thoughts, rather than to those special few who I designate as “loved ones.” I don’t do any of this perfectly, but I do it as consistently as I can, and when I notice that I am not doing it, I ask for and accept the Atonement for it.

How do I give all to all? I give love to everyone in every circumstance. Love will take whatever form is needed as long as I am allowing it to flow through me and I am not trying to direct it myself. This is my desire and my commitment. 

© 2014, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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Study of the Text A. To Have, Give All to All, Paragraph 4   1-14-14

A. To Have, Give All to All, Paragraph 4
4 To the Holy Spirit, there is no order of difficulty in miracles. This is familiar enough to you by now, but it has not yet become believable. Therefore, you do not understand it and cannot use it. We have too much to accomplish on behalf of the Kingdom to let this crucial concept slip away. It is a real foundation stone of the thought system I teach and want you to teach. You cannot perform miracles without believing it, because it is a belief in perfect equality. Only one equal gift can be offered to the equal Sons of God, and that is full appreciation. Nothing more and nothing less. Without a range order of difficulty is meaningless, and there must be no range in what you offer to your brother.

The reason there is no order of difficulty in miracles is that the miracle is a correction in perception and perception is how I see things. So all that is happening is that I am learning to see what is really there. How could one corrected thought be harder than another? A thought is a thought even if a particular thought triggers more fear or guilt than another. It is still just a thought.

My experience has gone something like this. I have experienced sickness, asked that my mind be healed of the belief in death (sickness), and seen the effect of the wrong-minded thought disappear. That is, the sickness disappeared. I have seen this happen in very dramatic ways. The body was not healed; the mind was healed. But it is the sick mind that projects the sick body and so when the mind is healed, it projects a healed body.

The ego world is based on separation, and that includes the idea of levels and ranges. So to the ego mind, one type of sickness is different than another and one type would be harder to heal than another. This cannot be true, because everything is only an idea, and you can’t have a bigger or smaller idea. I can have an idea I am simply not willing to release, but that doesn’t make the idea bigger or harder.

Accepting that the world and the body are not real, but simply the reflection of beliefs held in the mind has made it easier to accept that there is no order of difficulty in miracles. It is essential that I fully accept this premise if I am to perform miracles. The truth is whole and wholeness doesn’t vary. My fear of sickness and my fear of poverty and my fear of heights are all the same. They are exactly the same “size” and the solution to these problems are exactly the same.

In my ego mind the fear of heights and the fear of losing a child, for example, loom large and firmly rooted. I see them as giant sequoias with roots going so deep I cannot imagine getting to them. I see me with a little spade removing the dirt from around the roots but with little hope of taking down that giant tree. At the same time, I see a cold or the flu as weeds in my garden. Pull those suckers up and throw them away. I don’t get sick often and the sickness is mild and short lived generally because I can’t sustain a belief in them, and they can’t exist without my belief.

Of course, the truth is, those beliefs are all the same size and none of them is more deeply rooted than the other. I know this is true, and yet I have held onto certain beliefs even as I asked that they be healed, and doing this makes one seem harder to heal than another and encourages the idea that there is an order of difficulty in miracles.

My job here is to allow my mind to be healed, which then allows miracles to be performed through me. In this way I join Jesus in awakening the Sonship. I cannot do my part if I use my fear to perpetuate the belief in order of difficulty. If I offer miracles that are less than whole, then I am really offering magic and not miracles. When I am afraid this seems like an impossible task, but really, I just change my mind. I change my mind all the time so I know I can do it.

© 2014, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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