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Study of Text, Chapter 12: VII. Looking Within, P 8. 4-4-16

VII. Looking Within, P 8

8 When you want only love you will see nothing else. The contradictory nature of the witnesses you perceive is merely the reflection of your conflicting invitations. You have looked upon your mind and accepted opposition there, having sought it there. But do not then believe that the witnesses for opposition are true, for they attest only to your decision about reality, returning to you the messages you gave them. Love, too, is recognized by its messengers. If you make love manifest, its messengers will come to you because you invited them.

Journal
Jesus is always telling me that what I have is what I want. He says that I am always doing this to myself and that the world I see is the result of the choice to see it. So if I really want love then I will see love and nothing else. He doesn’t say that I have to wait for the world to change, or that I have to change it. He says that when I want only love I will see nothing else.

I accept that this is true. I don’t always understand how that can be, and I certainly don’t understand why I would issue an invitation for anything other than love. But I accept it as true anyway, and I work from there. I have had some days of floating blissfully above the battleground. No matter what has happened, I have been happy. I have felt joy welling up with me. I have felt that strong connection with Spirit.

It has not been uninterrupted joy. There were challenging moments, but I met them with the strength of God that is available to me and they passed easily. But this morning I woke up feeling heavy and earthbound. Nothing is really wrong, nothing bad is happening. I just feel like my feet are stuck in quicksand and I am being held down. No more blissful floating.

I asked Holy Spirit what was going on. It felt bad, and I had a moment of panic because I didn’t know what happened and couldn’t seem to do anything about it. I tried my surrender exercise. I tried to feel the connection. Where did all that joy go? Where did God go? I suspected He didn’t go anywhere, but evidently I did. So I asked. Where did the love go, God?

I was shown the thoughts I have had since yesterday. I am preparing for my trip and there are a few things that must be done and not all of them can be done immediately. I am worried something will be forgotten. My drier stopped working last night and today I have to get a new one on my lunch hour. Will this be complicated? How do I choose a new one? I read what people have reported on all the major brands and none of them seem a safe bet.

I am starting to see where this is going. I am looking to my ego mind to judge what is happening. I feel very defensive. I want to defend against forgetfulness, mistakes, buying the wrong drier, all sorts of things. So let me remember that it is in my defenselessness that my safety lies. Not in keeping good lists and checking everything off. Not in finding the perfect drier. Not in arranging everything just right. Not in staying within some kind of budget.

These are not the things that make me safe. These thoughts are the thoughts that bring fear into my mind. When I defend myself I teach myself that I need defense and have every right to be afraid. I can have fear or I can have love. The circumstances in my life do not determine my choice. What I want determines my choice.

I chose love. It wasn’t hard. I just chose it. The joy is back. The floaty feeling is back. I am above the battleground again. I see the ego down there trying to get my attention, waving lists at me, warning me something could go wrong. I wave back. Not interested, ego. (giggle) It is so funny how confused I sometimes become, how afraid of nothing. No matter what happens or doesn’t happen, love is a choice and it is always available to me. The only requirement is that I want nothing else.

© 2016, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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Study of Text, Chapter 12: VII. Looking Within, P 7. 4-1-16

VII. Looking Within, P 7
7 I said before that what you project or extend is up to you, but you must do one or the other, for that is a law of mind, and you must look in before you look out. As you look in, you choose the guide for seeing. And then you look out and behold his witnesses. This is why you find what you seek. What you want in yourself you will make manifest, and you will accept it from the world because you put it there by wanting it. When you think you are projecting what you do not want, it is still because you do want it. This leads directly to dissociation, for it represents the acceptance of two goals, each perceived in a different place; separated from each other because you made them different. The mind then sees a divided world outside itself, but not within. This gives it an illusion of integrity, and enables it to believe that it is pursuing one goal. Yet as long as you perceive the world as split, you are not healed. For to be healed is to pursue one goal, because you have accepted only one and want but one.

Journal
What I project or extend is up to me but I must do one or the other. That is a helpful sentence. I cannot sit on some kind of neutral ground and do nothing. I cannot look at the world and say someone else did it. What I see when I look outward comes from my mind, not from something outside me as there is nothing outside me. Let us say that I go to work today and I walk in on one of my co-workers stealing something.

I first go within to choose an interpreter. I don’t say to myself I am going to do this. It is not a conscious decision, but it is one that is made. If I choose the ego as my interpreter I will see a guilty person. There will probably be a lot of thoughts in my mind about this according to what I have learned about this kind of behavior. Choosing ego as interpreter is deciding on projection. I project onto the person doing the stealing judgments that come from my mind. I give their behavior all the meaning it has for me.

If I choose the Holy Spirit as my interpreter, I will have different thoughts about the person. When this kind of thing has happened to me in the past, I have seen a call for love. This person thinks they cannot be happy without having the thing being stolen. Perhaps they think they cannot be happy unless they have what they covet of another person, not so much the object, but just the idea of having what they think others have and they don’t.

There is no reason to judge. There is never a reason to judge. There is only the understanding that the person is confused about what happiness is and how to achieve it. There is no reason for pity. Confusion is not truth and so it is not real. They will overcome their confusion. That is what we do here. We look at our confusion and we choose against it. Eventually.

If the person’s behavior upsets me it is only because they trigger in me something that upsets me. It has nothing to do with them or their behavior or their confusion. It is about my confusion. I see in another only what is in my mind. All judgment of another is judgment of self as seen in another.

As I look at this person who is stealing, and I look with Holy Spirit, I see only a need for love and so I give love. I may not say a word, but in my heart I know the person for who they are, not what they fear. I know they are the Son of God and lack nothing. I am not fooled by their confusion. This is extension.

When I choose projection, I suffer because projection causes suffering. No one believes they want to suffer, but if we suffer it is because we have chosen suffering. There is nothing in our life we did not choose. We chose suffering through choosing the ego interpretation, which leads to projection and suffering. So we did it to ourselves.

Saying we don’t want to suffer when clearly, that was our choice, is having two goals. The mind is split. We have chosen to leave the Kingdom all over again. I suppose there is no other way we could see ourselves separate from God now unless we choose separation now. Having two goals is separation. So in every moment we are deciding to separate ourselves from God or deciding to know our Self as one with God. It is the original “sin” all over again, over and over.

In the moment I see with Christ’s Vision this person who is stealing, I have extended Love. I have returned to God. In the next moment when I am faced with the choice between extension and projection, I might find myself projecting and so I experience myself as outside the Kingdom. More and more often, the joy of extension motivates me to that choice and eventually, it will be the only choice I make. Then I will be awake in the world, seeing only what Love sees, being in joy all the time.

This is why I choose the peace of God as my only goal. When I forget and choose something else as my goal, then I change my mind and return to my goal. If I think that people should not steal, then I have a different goal. If I think that people should not be grandiose and arrogant, I have a different goal. The ego sees many goals in the world, but I don’t have to embrace those goals as mine. I am free to return as quickly as possible to my one goal as I remember that the peace of God is everything I want.

© 2016, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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Study of Text, Chapter 12, VII.Looking Within, P 6. 3-31-16

VII. Looking Within, P 6

6 I am the manifestation of the Holy Spirit, and when you see me it will be because you have invited Him. For He will send you His witnesses if you will but look upon them. Remember always that you see what you seek, for what you seek you will find. The ego finds what it seeks, and only that. It does not find love, for that is not what it is seeking. Yet seeking and finding are the same, and if you seek for two goals you will find them, but you will recognize neither. You will think they are the same because you want both of them. The mind always strives for integration, and if it is split and wants to keep the split, it will still believe it has one goal by making it seem to be one.

Journal
No wonder we live in such confusion. This paragraph made me think of the ever elusive “love.” Through our real mind we seek for love. Through our ego mind we do not want love. So we seek and do not find. Of course. What else could happen? We seek love and find neediness. We tell ourselves that we were seeking love and so neediness must be love. Our love songs sing praises to it. “I need you so much. I can’t live without you.” Not really songs of love, but songs of ego. Only our minds can’t tell the difference because we have tried to integrate opposite goals.

When we are ready for the truth, we begin the search for love in the only place we will find it; we look within. We are the love we seek and until we recognize this, we will fail to find love. Once we recognize that love has found us, and there is no other place to look, we will see love everywhere. We will be in love with everyone and all things. There will be no place where love is not. This is true because our mind is no longer split. We have one goal and so we seek one thing and what we seek we will find.

I can talk about this because I have had glimpses of it, not enough to discuss it further, but just enough to know this is true. Now I spend all my time recognizing goals that are not love and changing my mind about my desire for them. For instance, I think that I need my daughter to spend time with me. I think I need my son to be something different. I think I need my friend to agree with me. Then I will feel loved.

Ha ha ha. This is not love no matter how the ego argues for it. I watch for that kind of confusion in my mind, and I give it to the Holy Spirit to correct. This is how my mind is healed and my vision made singular. One goal assures success. It is in this way, I will soon reach such clarity about what I want that I will ask for only the one thing. I will no longer obscure the love that is waiting for me to acknowledge it.

© 2016, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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Study of Text, Chapter 12, VII.Looking Within, P 5. 3-30-16

VII. Looking Within, P 5

5 You see what you expect, and you expect what you invite. Your perception is the result of your invitation, coming to you as you sent for it. Whose manifestations would you see? Of whose presence would you be convinced? For you will believe in what you manifest, and as you look out so will you see in. Two ways of looking at the world are in your mind, and your perception will reflect the guidance you have chosen.

Journal

Jesus says that I will manifest what I want and I will believe in what I manifest. It is another way of saying that I will look within and project what I see there onto the world. Then I will look at the world and say, “See, I knew it was true.” This is why I never look at my manifestation and pray for another different one. I look at my manifestation to see what is in my mind, and then ask that my mind be healed. In that way I heal the source of the problem.

Another way to say this is that I use the world to show me if I am thinking with ego or thinking with Holy Spirit. This is why we can change the world as we change our thoughts, and in fact, must change the world as we change our thoughts. The world is the reflection of our thoughts. This would seem impossible, but it is actually very simple, and even easy when we become convinced that we want to see a forgiven world rather than a vengeful one.

The reason it is simple is that we are always manifesting as we are guided to do. Whose guidance are we listening to? If we are listening to the ego we will believe that we are separate and alone and must guard against all others. We must protect and defend and that means we must attack when we think we are attacked. Or better yet, we must go on the offensive and attack first.

Have you ever had an imaginary conversation in your mind with someone you think might attack you, and in the conversation you get the upper hand? Nothing has happened, you have not been attacked and maybe never will be. But, hey, you have already won the battle and the ego says that’s the way to go. If it keeps you in anxiety, the ego says that’s good. You need to be on the defensive.

The Holy Spirit has guidance that is completely differently. He says we are not separate and therefore not vulnerable. He says we are holy and we are in God and part of God, and cannot be hurt. He guides us to surrender to this reality and we will experience only love and gladness. He says it is safe to disarm, and in fact, He says that it is in our defenselessness our safety lies, because it is this constant defense that is scaring us.

So when I have those imaginary conversations now, I turn from them and ask the Holy Spirit to remove those fear based thoughts from my mind. If this imagined attack occurs and there is something to say, I will be told what that is. From this place of certainty I will feel safe and the “attack” will not frighten me. I will see the call for love and will gladly answer it. Why wouldn’t I?

© 2016, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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Study of Text, Chapter 12: VII. Looking Within, P 4. 3-28-16

VII. Looking Within, P4
4 You cannot see the Holy Spirit, but you can see His manifestations. And unless you do, you will not realize He is there. Miracles are His witnesses, and speak for His Presence. What you cannot see becomes real to you only through the witnesses that speak for it. For you can be aware of what you cannot see, and it can become compellingly real to you as its presence becomes manifest through you. Do the Holy Spirit’s work, for you share in His function. As your function in Heaven is creation, so your function on earth is healing. God shares His function with you in Heaven, and the Holy Spirit shares His with you on earth. As long as you believe you have other functions, so long will you need correction. For this belief is the destruction of peace, a goal in direct opposition to the Holy Spirit’s purpose.

Journal
In Heaven my function is Creation, which I share with God. Healing is my function here in time and space. I share this function with the Holy Spirit. So it becomes my work here to clear the way for the Holy Spirit to do His healing work through me. I do this as I allow Him to heal my mind of untrue thoughts. My mind can be very dark if I allow ego thoughts to proliferate, but as I notice these thoughts and ask that they be removed, the mind is light and in this light the Holy Spirit works Its miracles.

As I see His manifestations in my life, He becomes as real to me as the world used to be. It’s funny to see this change. I used to believe in the world and doubt Divinity and now it is completely reversed. I was speaking to someone about miracles this weekend. He sees what I see but interprets it differently. Things that clearly reverse the laws of the world leave him unimpressed. He sees each one as having some “logical” explanation, even if he can’t find that explanation. We see what we want to see.

I suppose that is why we each have to experience the miracles ourselves. I have to open my mind and allow the Holy Spirit to work miracles through me if I want to know the Holy Spirit exists in me. It is not enough that I see someone else believes in miracles or even experiences them.  It must be my experience to be real to me.

I have seen things in my own life that were beyond the laws of the world, physical healings, for instance. But the miracles that astound me and convince me are the healings of my mind. Sometimes it requires time for me to accept and thus allow these healings to be manifested through me, and sometimes it is instantaneous. As they occur more often, I become more convinced and thus more accepting, and the idea of the Holy Spirit, and healing and miracles becomes as dependable and as expected as gravity. Gratitude has become the ocean I swim in daily.

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Study of Text, Chapter 12: VII. Looking Within, P 3. 3-23-16

VII. Looking Within, P 3
3 The Holy Spirit is invisible, but you can see the results of His Presence, and through them you will learn that He is there. What He enables you to do is clearly not of this world, for miracles violate every law of reality as this world judges it. Every law of time and space, of magnitude and mass is transcended, for what the Holy Spirit enables you to do is clearly beyond all of them. Perceiving His results, you will understand where He must be, and finally know what He is.

Journal
When people experience their awakening, they say that they see the world entirely differently.  Fear falls away and they no longer see guilt, but only love.  That is surely a miracle! I have not yet experienced that miracle. However, I have witnessed the results of the Holy Spirit’s presence in my life.

I have experienced pain disappear because the Holy Spirit healed my mind at my request. I have seen injuries heal quickly and without pain, and I am sure it would have been instantaneous if I had been ready for that. I have watched as time slowed down because I needed it to do so and called on Jesus to adjust time for me. I have witnessed anger, fear, and guilt dissolve so completely that I could not remember what they felt like.

I have read about miracles in the lives of others. Anita Moorjani talks about her miraculous experience in Dying to Be Me. It is a well documented story and is the work of the Holy Spirit making clear His presence. Jan Frazier shares her story of fear falling away in such a dramatic way that we cannot miss the miracle of it. I have talked to several people who witnessed the dead returning to life at a workshop given by Nouk Sanchez. And she has shared healing miracles that occurred to her personally.

When our minds are healed we experience the presence of the Holy Spirit and we know that It is real. The Holy Spirit is an invisible power but a very real power, and that power is made manifest in the world through our acceptance of the Atonement. We can’t see gravity, but we know it is there because we stay grounded to the earth. We can’t see love but we know it is real when we look at our children. We don’t see the Holy Spirit, but we know He exists because He enables us to transcend the laws of the world.

The world is an illusion, but it doesn’t seem like an illusion. It feels very real to us. Its laws seem immutable. It may not, in reality, matter what happens in this illusion, it is important, I think, to allow the miracle to express within the illusion. It is in this way we make visible the invisible, and we become convinced that the Holy Spirit in us exists. It is not a miracle that the world changes, the miracle is the change of mind that creates the appearance of change. The change itself is merely the manifestation of the miracle, but it is a powerful effect as it witnesses to the existence of your power being used for healing.

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Study of Text, Chapter 12, VII. Looking Within, P 2. 3-23-16

VII. Looking Within, P 2
2 Everyone in the world must play his part in its redemption, in order to recognize that the world has been redeemed. You cannot see the invisible. Yet if you see its effects you know it must be there. By perceiving what it does, you recognize its being. And by what it does, you learn what it is. You cannot see your strengths, but you gain confidence in their existence as they enable you to act. And the results of your actions you can see.

Journal
I must play my part in the redemption of the world. My part is essential. I think of it as a vast tapestry that encompasses all of the world. My part in the weaving of this tapestry is very tiny, but if I don’t do it, there will be hole in the tapestry. So that I must do it is not in question. But what is my part? My part is to accept the Atonement for myself.

In this story of Myron that appears as looking at the situations that make up my life here, recognizing that they represent beliefs in my mind. I then allowing the mistaken beliefs to be healed. Sounds simple enough, and it is simple, but there are times when it has felt hard. In fact there are times when I didn’t understand it, and times when it has felt like I couldn’t do it.

But when my faith in myself has faltered, I have believe in Jesus. I believed he gave us the Course as a way to understand and as a carefully planned system to help us accept the Atonement. So I kept going. I kept trying to accept the Atonement, and trusted that it was working even when I felt inadequate to the task. I didn’t see my own strength and had trouble believing in it.

Over time, though, I have experienced the healing that Jesus promised in the Course. Even though it is not complete yet, I see from the results I have experienced so far, that it will be done as he said it would be. So I am gaining certainty in my strength even though that strength is not always apparent. I am gaining certainty because the healing of my mind is the effect of that strength and so it convinces me that what I cannot always see is, indeed, there.

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