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Study of Text, C 14: III. The Decision for Guiltlessness, P 14. 3-16-17

III. The Decision for Guiltlessness, P 14
14 Let Him, therefore, be the only Guide that you would follow to salvation. He knows the way, and leads you gladly on it. With Him you will not fail to learn that what God wills for you is your will. Without His guidance you will think you know alone, and will decide against your peace as surely as you decided that salvation lay in you alone. Salvation is of Him to Whom God gave it for you. He has not forgotten it. Forget Him not and He will make every decision for you, for your salvation and the peace of God in you.

Journal

Even though Jesus is telling us over and over that we can let the Holy Spirit decide for us, I am just now realizing how literal this is. In fact, it is not just an offer; it is necessary. To awaken I must stop trying to be alone in my decisions. I can’t anyway. In The Rules for Decision section in Chapter 30, Jesus explains that we cannot make decisions on our own. We either make them with the ego or with the Holy Spirit.

So if I make them with the Holy Spirit that means I am joining with Him in the decision process. I surrender the desire to make the decision and I ask Him to do it for me. My part is the surrender; His part is to make the decision. I wonder if others feel, too, a little a little resistance to that idea, a little uneasiness. I think that is the ego mind that prides itself in its decision-making prerogative. It doesn’t make very good decisions, but by golly, it jealously guards the right to make them.

The ego mind wants to keep that right. It wants to decide on its own. The thought of losing that “right” is frightening to the ego. It feels like a sacrifice to the ego mind to let go of the decision-making process. It feels like this is a loss of self, and it is. The loss is only to the ego, though, not to me. As I have let go of the self, my holy Self as risen in my consciousness and with it has come happiness and peace.

In other words, the light has come. When I turn to the light, there are no dark thoughts. When I return my attention to the darkness, there is no light. Somehow I have often allowed the ego mind to convince me the darkness is my friend. This is what comes of asking the ego to decide for me. The ego loves the dark because it hides its insane thought system in the dark.

Light would expose the ego’s insanity, and then who would want it? Light would show the Holy Spirit’s benign intentions. Darkness hides the ego’s tyranny under the false mask of self-determination. In the light we see the Holy Spirit’s kind helpfulness waiting patiently for our permission to act on our behalf.

Jesus says to forget not the Holy Spirit and He will make every decision for me. So today I will remember the Holy Spirit. I will invite Him to make all decisions for me. What a simple and joyful experience life will be as I make this my default setting. I am going to trust this and I am going to test it. I surrender completely and if I am tempted to return to the ego’s dark help, I will choose again until I cannot imagine deciding otherwise.

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Posted by Rev. Myron Jones.

Study of Text, C 14: III. The Decision for Guiltlessness, P 13. 3-15-17

III. The Decision for Guiltlessness, P 13
13 The One Who knows the plan of God that God would have you follow can teach you what it is. Only His wisdom is capable of guiding you to follow it. Every decision you undertake alone but signifies that you would define what salvation is, and what you would be saved from. The Holy Spirit knows that all salvation is escape from guilt. You have no other “enemy,” and against this strange distortion of the purity of the Son of God the Holy Spirit is your only Friend. He is the strong protector of the innocence that sets you free. And it is His decision to undo everything that would obscure your innocence from your unclouded mind.

Journal
Here is what stood out for me. God has a plan to guide me Home and He gave that plan to the Holy Spirit. It is the only plan that will work and only the Holy Spirit has the wisdom capable of guiding me to follow it. When I try to make decisions on my own, I am choosing my own plan for salvation and taking myself out of God’s perfect plan. The Holy Spirit does not try to overcome my stubbornness but only waits patiently for me to change my mind.

For most of my life I didn’t understand what I was trying to save myself from, but now I see that the only thing I must be saved from is guilt. Guilt is my only enemy and the Holy Spirit is my only Friend. As I practice making all decisions with the Holy Spirit rather than ego, I will be set free from my belief in guilt and I will know my innocence. Simply put, guilt has obscured the truth of my innocence and God has given the Holy Spirit a plan to free me. I am accepting that plan as I make my decisions with Holy Spirit rather than ego. That is all that is going on here.

Yesterday an old fear came up in my mind. I could see the obscuring impressions of guilt all around it, making it feel real and threatening. I worked with it but I could tell that I was merely putting it away for the night rather than releasing it entirely. I woke up this morning from strange and vaguely disturbing dreams, and I know that this is because I made a decision with ego to keep my old fear.

Suddenly the dream remnants from last night start to make sense in a symbolic way. There was a child who has a terrible injury on his back. I know we must call an ambulance but all sorts of stuff is happening instead and all around him as he lays there. I periodically realize I am ignoring the main problem and think again I have to do something about the injured child. I never do. I try to fix every other problem around him, but I don’t fix the main problem, the real problem. That is the story of me and this fear I have been walking around, thinking I must do something about, but working on everything else, anything else, ignoring the cause of my only real problem.

The lesson from this morning reminds me there is no will but God’s and so it must be that my will is the same as God’s Will. It cannot be that fear and guilt are God’s Will so the fear and guilt I feel must be something I made up, something that happened because I chose to believe in another will. Believing in another will makes it real in my dream, but not in reality. This means that I can break free of it when I decide to. I must be choosing to suffer. I am ready to stop tying to fix the world around my problem and allow Holy Spirit to correct this fear and guilt belief in my mind. Holy Spirit help me now as I decide with You rather than ego.

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Posted by Rev. Myron Jones.

Study of Text, C 14: III. The Decision for Guiltlessness, P 12. 3-14-17

III. The Decision for Guiltlessness, P 12
12 Would you deny the truth of God’s decision, and place your pitiful appraisal of yourself in place of His calm and unswerving value of His Son? Nothing can shake God’s conviction of the perfect purity of everything that He created, for it is wholly pure. Do not decide against it, for being of Him it must be true. Peace abides in every mind that quietly accepts the plan God set for its Atonement, relinquishing its own. You know not of salvation, for you do not understand it. Make no decisions about what it is or where it lies, but ask the Holy Spirit everything, and leave all decisions to His gentle counsel.

Journal
I am the only thing standing between salvation and me. God knows who I am and knows my perfection. He doesn’t judge me and He is not disappointed in me. Jesus put the Atonement plan in action and is in charge of it. He is helping me in many ways, always holding my hand as I navigate the darkened mind of ego. God’s Holy Spirit is in my mind guiding and directing me every step of the way. I cannot fail.

The only thing that is required of me is my desire for salvation and my willingness to release everything that blocks my awareness of loves presence in my mind. I am getting better at this, more willing, and my motivation grows stronger as I do my part and experience the happy effects of having done so. The ego mind has been my go-to guy for longer than I can know, so I still hear that cranky little voice, but I am more likely to dismiss it now.

Yesterday while I was brushing my teeth I remembered that I have a dental appointment. I started thinking about my dentist and wondering if I should find another one. Before I could even finish brushing my teeth I had built a case against him. Suddenly I noticed what I was doing and realized I had attacked him. I realized that I had a grievance against him and that grievance was standing between my salvation and me. I talked to Holy Spirit about it and I released it to Him.

This morning I thought about a loved one and I became worried about him. I wondered if it was too early for me to call him and see if he was ok. I realized immediately that this is an attack. I was assuming that because he has made bad choices in the past that he might do it again. I was seeing him as vulnerable and weak and needing my help. What is that but an attack on God’s Son?

Because of fear I have had trouble letting this one go, but this morning I quickly went to Holy Spirit to show Him what I was thinking and how dark the world is when I do this. I sought His wise and gentle counsel. I was reminded that it feels hard to relinquish these untrue thoughts only when I tried to do it alone.

I remembered that I am not alone, that it is not the ego’s strength that I am depending on but the strength of God in me. I remembered that it is God’s Mind in which I think. I remembered that there is nothing my holiness cannot do. I felt the darkness leave me and the light brightened my world through my willingness to forgive. This really is not hard to do.

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Posted by Rev. Myron Jones.

Study of Text, C 14: III. The Decision for Guiltlessness, P 11. 3-13-17

III. The Decision for Guiltlessness, P 11
11 It will never happen that you must make decisions for yourself. You are not bereft of help, and Help that knows the answer. Would you be content with little, which is all that you alone can offer yourself, when He Who gives you everything will simply offer it to you? He will never ask what you have done to make you worthy of the gift of God. Ask it not therefore of yourself. Instead, accept His answer, for He knows that you are worthy of everything God wills for you. Do not try to escape the gift of God He so freely and so gladly offers you. He offers you but what God gave Him for you. You need not decide whether or not you are deserving of it. God knows you are.

Journal

There was a time when I thought there were some decisions I should make on my own, like I was being lazy if I asked for help with every little decision. I would turn to God when I was backed into a corner; otherwise I did it on my own. There was a time, actually until fairly recently, when I thought that I could make decisions on my own, as if I could make them with God or with ego or just by myself. Now that seems ridiculous. Did I think there was a “me” separate from both ego and God?

I hope never to ask the ego for help in making decisions again. I have real Help. I have God’s Holy Spirit in my mind and I have complete access to that Divine Help. Why on earth would I not take it? Why would I ask the ego mind what to do next? When has it ever been in my best interest to consult with ego? When I use the ego mind to do my thinking it can only be because I still value the idea of an identity separate from God.

I am certain that is not a good idea, and yet, here I am in a body, behaving like a body is what I am rather than an image I am using to represent a separation idea. How do I know that I am identifying with this body image as if it was really who I am? I worry about the world. I know I am not supposed to so I don’t let myself dwell on it, but when I hear something disturbing I feel my stomach clench. Then I push it away. When I am firmly anchored in the truth, I pull it back up and look at it with Holy Spirit, and release it to Him. Otherwise I just let it go back into the dark until the next time.

Another way I see I am attacked to my separate identity is when I hear that someone I know is sick and I have that automatic response of wanting to stay away for awhile so I don’t catch it. I feel guilty for not wanting to be a help, and guilty for believing in “catching” sickness when I have learned that sickness is in my mind and then projected onto the body, so I don’t catch it, I decide on it. Oops, I must have joined with ego in that decision. Again, I will probably use this opportunity to let go of more belief that there is value in that separation idea, but maybe not. Maybe I will try to push it down out of sight, and if I do, like a balloon it will push its way back up and I will have to deal with it again.

There are other ways I identify with the illusion and it is never an accident. I identify with what I want. But I am not guilty for that, and each time I notice I am doing it, I have another chance to loosen that idea so that I will one day (soon?) be through with it. Today I will make no decisions on my own, that is, with ego. Today, Holy Spirit, I want your help in all decisions. Today I want no truck with ego at all. When ego tries to slip an idea past me, this is what I will remember:  God is the Mind in which I think. The next time I feel hopelessly entangled with ego, I will remember that God is the strength in which I trust.

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Posted by Rev. Myron Jones.

Study of Text, C 14: III. The Decision for Guiltlessness, P 10. 3-9-17

III. The Decision for Guiltlessness, P 10
10 Those who accept the Atonement are invulnerable. But those who believe they are guilty will respond to guilt, because they think it is salvation, and will not refuse to see it and side with it. They believe that increasing guilt is self-protection. And they will fail to understand the simple fact that what they do not want must hurt them. All this arises because they do not believe that what they want is good. Yet will was given them because it is holy, and will bring to them all that they need, coming as naturally as peace that knows no limits. There is nothing their will fails to provide that offers them anything of value. Yet because they do not understand their will, the Holy Spirit quietly understands it for them, and gives them what they want without effort, strain, or the impossible burden of deciding what they want and need alone.

Journal

When we have accepted the Atonement we will know we are invulnerable. The reason we fail to know this now is that we are attracted to guilt. We believe in guilt and we believe it is our salvation. After all this time of working with the Course I notice that there is still the belief in my mind that guilt has some value and so I don’t give it up altogether.

I keep it locked away for the most part, but every so often it escapes its confines and I see that I am angry or fearful and I know that I have been harboring guilt. Guilt likes to disguise itself as something else. I know someone who is self-destructive and I decide to point out his problems. I do this in the name of love, but really, I am just telling him how guilty he is, and at the same time, I am convincing myself that guilt is real and that I am guilty.

You see, what we teach we learn. Giving is the way we receive, and I sometimes give what I will regret receiving. So I look at it again and consider its value to me, and I realize that it is not helping me as I thought it was and it is not helping the other person either. Then I give it to the Holy Spirit. I show Him the thoughts I have about guilt. I show Him my fear and anger. Then I ask Him to purify my mind. Each time this happens I feel freer and happier and the next time I notice the idea of guilt it is easier to release it.

I have a powerful will that can undo the false beliefs that I told myself were true, but that will has been imprisoned by those very beliefs. That doesn’t mean I am lost. I have a Guide and He is a Healer and my Helper. I don’t remember how my will works but He does. He waits patiently for me to realize that guilt is hurting me and I don’t want it anymore. Then He gives me freedom from the belief in guilt. He gives me what I want, and I am able receive it without effort, strain, or the impossible burden of deciding on my own what it is that I want and need.

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Posted by Rev. Myron Jones.

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