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january-March, 2008

The Ego Has a Really “Big But”

by Rev. Mary Gerrard Lenihan, author of The Mentor Within

The other day another human being in the throws of ego desperation called me complaining about another human being also in the throws of ego desperation with whom she desperately desired an ego relationship and couldn’t imagine not having what she so desperately desired.

Sure that she had tried everything under the sun to win this man’s understanding, heart, and very soul, she was still not ready to surrender. The torment in her mind was overwhelming. She can’t sleep, she can’t eat, she can’t work, but apparently was finding plenty of time and motivation to toke a few joints and crack open the Jack Daniels. This she said was the only relief she found; the ego in a drunken, dazed stupor was “relief.”

Well, such it is. We have all experienced our own mini-soap opera version of this script. I personally tried to help this character the ego was playing see the insanity of her behavior. I listened; I comforted; I gave gentle suggestions. I asked questions hoping she would find a clear answer or at least an umbrella under which to stand as shelter from the barrage of ego ignorance.

Eventually, I came to my senses. I realized I was relying on my senses. Yes, I had initially stepped back and asked Holy Spirit for help, BUT, when she had no willingness to join me in this place, I put on my swimsuit and jumped into the ego cesspool with her, taking on more of an in the world psychological perspective of how she might consider “dealing” with her feelings.

I began to feel hopeless as to how to truly help this individual. No matter what I did, how long I listened, shared my own experience and what I had found to be helpful in the past, step back and offer some “spiritual” sounding words… She returned again and again and yet again, with “BUT … BUT … BUT …”

Finally, I threw my hands, and my ego mind along with them, up in the air to Holy Spirit, truly giving up. And heard my SELF saying, “Yeah, the ego has a really BIG BUT!”

We broke into laughter. Holy Spirit nailed it! Tell it like it is. Forget all this other stinking ego version of what might be helpful. It wasn’t working.

As the Mentor Within said in my book, “Stop trying to change ridiculousness into more ridiculousness.” In that moment we both broke through the nightmare and truly saw the Light. Why? Because Holy Spirit tells it like it is and we were willing to listen.

We are told in A Course in Miracles that the ego’s goal is “seek and do not find.”

Undoing the ego happens as we are willing to see the tortured little speck of bird doo on the windshield that the ego really is. It clouds our vision, attempts to smear the truth, and stinks up the joint.

Once we notice this, talk about it, analyze it, write books about it, teach about it… we must at some point be WILLING to step back, take our “BIG BUT” to the Holy Spirit and say, “I am willing to give this ego “BIG BUT” to You, Holy Spirit, because it has gotten so big I can’t sit, walk, stand, swim, or bend over to pick up a dancing daisy; I cannot forgive.

I am in debt with misperceptions and grievances beyond my credit limit, I have reached my limit, and with Holy Spirit I now realize I have no limit.”

So, are we “fed up” yet? If so, let us put that ego “BIG BUT” on a FORGIVENESS DIET WITH HOLY SPIRIT and lose the greatest weight we are carrying around — the unforgiving ego mind.

Rev. Mary Gerard Lenihan is a Pathways of Light minister living in St. Louis, Missouri. Visit Mary’s web site at: http://www.thementorwithin.com Mary Gerard Lenihan is the author of the book, The Mentor Within, Let your SELF be seen. You may purchase this book online at the Pathways of Light web site.

© 2008, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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january-March, 2008

Trusting Holy Spirit’s Plan

by Revs. Robert & Mary Stoelting

During the Annual Membership Weekend last October, there was a strong sense that Pathways of Light was on the cusp of an exciting new phase in its service to Holy Spirit’s plan of awakening from the dream of separation. There was a strong feeling of pending opening and expansion. Though there were no specifics at that time, a number of people there commented that they felt it.
 
Each of us has a special function to fulfill in Holy Spirit’s plan of awakening. The job for each of us is to keep our minds and hearts open and have a consistent willingness to follow the guidance of our Inner Teacher, day by day. No more is needed from us and no less.

The Course tells us that it is not hard for us to do what Christ asks of us because it is He Who does it. As we practice trusting in the strength of God in us, we recognize that what we may have perceived as difficulties are easily released and resolved when given to the Holy Spirit.

The progression of “events” in the dream that have led to Pathways of Light as it is now could be traced back many years, even generations. Inspiration and choices made by many people have prepared the way, providing experiences, skills and facilities orchestrated so exquisitely that it could only have been accomplished by the Hand of One Who sees beyond the limited images of this world. As we see this grand plan unfolding, we can only stand in appreciation and gratitude for the gift of being part of this shared, healing experience.

In ACIM Text, Chapter 27, we are taught that, on our own, we do not know what is best for us. It is only the Holy Spirit Who understands what would help and what would hinder our awakening to the truth. “Accept the dream He gave instead of yours. It is not difficult to change a dream when once the dreamer has been recognized. Rest in the Holy Spirit, and allow His gentle dreams to take the place of those you dreamed in terror and in fear of death.” T-27.14:1-3

When we consistently practice giving our day to the Holy Spirit, we are giving up the role of being the author of our dream script and handing it over to our true Self Who knows how to guide our day in a way that is truly helpful for everyone.
 
As we continue to practice this, we can clearly see that a new phase for Pathways of Light has been opening up during the past few months. Several people have volunteered to participate in a joined venture of translating all of the ministerial training courses Pathways of Light offers into Spanish and Portuguese. Because of the simplicity of electronic e-mail and services such as Skype and Vonage, we can easily communicate instantly with anyone in the world.

The Spanish translations and audio recordings of meditations in Spanish for the courses are being spearheaded by Rev. Annie Arbona, who became a Pathways of Light minister last year. Recently the translating team has expanded to include Yvelise Fingerhut, Johannys Hartog and Rev. Anna Maria Penate.

In addition, Rev. Helena Monteiro, who grew up in Brazil but is currently residing in England, is now in the process of translating the Pathways of Light courses into Portuguese.

We are very grateful to the service these Pathways angels are providing for us, and for all the Spanish and Portuguese speaking people who are interested in applying A Course in Miracles in their daily lives. As we hand our lives over in service to the Holy Spirit’s plan of awakening, amazing healing occurs for everyone.

In A Course in Miracles we are told, “The Holy Spirit is described throughout the Course as giving us the answer to the separation and bringing the plan of the Atonement to us, establishing our particular part in it and showing us exactly what it is.”

Our job is to listen and to trust that the Holy Spirit knows better than we do on our own.

Mary & Robert Stoelting are co-founers of Pathways of Light. They live at the Pathways of Light Center in Kiel, Wisconsin.

© 2008, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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january-March, 2008

Change Without Fear

Rev. Annie Arbona

On a scale from one to ten, change can be experienced at all different levels of fear. If we can remember times of transition in our lives, we can also remember the fearful sensations that accompanied them. The unknown, the unfamiliar and the new seem to threaten our ego personalities and often make us feel such uncertainty, and definitely insecure.

When we begin to believe in miracles, which are changes in perception, we soon discover that in the dream state of constant movement there is another way of experiencing the “dance of change” we are engaged in. As we allow Spirit to gently correct and heal our thoughts of fear, and as we allow His soft guiding Voice to lead us through change, it all becomes a blessed and holy adventure.

What a blessing to be able to embrace the turning points in our lives with total ease and certainty! What a blessing to flow with each wave of change in sacred synchronicity with all the other pieces that make up the mosaic of such movements!

What a blessing to flow with each wave of change in sacred synchronicity with all the other pieces that make up the mosaic of such movements!

What a profound sense of peace when Holy Guidance takes us by the hand and we are able to enter into the joy of each happening that follows! What grace-filled encounters when we surrender to each step of the way!

Are there words to express the wonder and beauty of the Holy Dance which we are all part of? Are there words to express the perfection of a universal choreograph?

When they are orchestrated by the Holy Spirit, all changes, turning points and transitions can become all of this and more. The Spirit sanctifies each decision we make with Him, and fills our paths with Light as we follow His lead. Would we want to choose differently when we know of the alternative of walking with Spirit through our experiences in a world that appears to be in constant fluctuation? I think we all know the answer to this. I think we all know how blessed we are.

A Course in Miracles always offers us such healing words for times when we forget. In Lesson 222 we are told, “God is with me. I live and move in Him. God is with me. He is my Source of life, the life within, the air I breathe, the food by which I am sustained, the water which renews and cleanses me. He is my home, wherein I live and move; the Spirit Which directs my actions, offers me Its Thoughts, and guarantees my safety from all pain. He covers me with kindness and with care, and holds in love the Son He shines upon, who also shines on Him. How still is he who knows the truth of what He speaks today!” W-pII.222.1:1-5

Rev. Annie Arbona is a Pathways of Light minister who facilitates the ministerial training curriculum in Spanish and English.

© 2008, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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january-March, 2008

Who Are You? and What Do You Want?

by Nouk Sanchez

What do you want? What is it that you really want, and are you ready to hear the truth?

The truth is that we don’t really know what we want and until we get clear about recognizing and owning this fact, we’ll never know what we’re really looking for let alone ever hope to find it!

Perhaps superficially we think we need money, a house, car, partner, better relationship or an education for our kids. Or maybe we think we need a special experience. Perhaps we think we need to control or avoid, or get healthier. Could there be an addiction that we want to give up?

But the real question here is just who is doing all this wanting? Who desires to be in control and to know? Who is perceiving scarcity? Is it you?

Most would answer, “Yes it’s me.” But the truth is it’s not. It’s nothing even close to who you are. Who you are is an extension of immense and infinite Love. You’re a living extension of the awesome power of Love with no opposite. That means that you’re a co-creator with infinite ability to extend What you are. And in giving your infinite abundance, you increase It all around and within.

You know that there is nothing to need, to have, to become, or to avoid. Can you imagine that? So, if you’re not experiencing this wonderful state every day then you’ve forgotten Who you are and therefore, what you really want.

Let’s talk about the ego. The ego is a lot more than you think. It’s you and it’s me. It’s who we think we are. It’s the ‘me’ factor that’s unconsciously called upon every time we utter the word ‘I.’ The ego consists of all our past memories and future hopes and fears. It’s every single thought we have that’s not joined with the Holy Spirit (Wow, that’s almost every decision we make!). All our judgments and all our beliefs are the lifeblood of the ego.

Even every urge we have to control our partner, child, work associate or situation arises from the ego. Every time our life presents us with something we don’t like (a flat tire in heavy traffic) and we say, “This is wrong,” that’s the ego. Feelings of anger, fear, frustration, lack, distrust, and guilt are all the ego. Whenever we think we know what’s in our own or another’s best interests, it’ll be the ego. In fact the ego is who we think we are. You can substitute the word ‘me’ with ego.

The ego is a thought apart from God, apart from infinite Love. In reality, nothing exists apart from God so we, as we currently think of and see ourselves, don’t exist.  A very frightening thought! It needn’t be though because A Course in Miracles clearly tells us that we are not who we think we are and it sets out a very clear pathway back to the awareness of our loving Oneness.

Earlier I said that we don’t know what we want. And I meant it. You won’t know what you want until you undo who you think you are, because what you think you want comes from the incessant neediness of the ego. And being a will that’s apart from God, the ego ensures you keep searching everywhere for what you want except within your mind; the only place where change and healing is required so you can remember Who you truly are.

The mind is the cause of everything. The world we see is its effect. The ego is a figment of our imagination that seems so real. It’s only a pile of uninvestigated beliefs based on past individual and collective beliefs that we rarely question like the prized value of the body, money, education or gaining more knowledge and skills. All our current beliefs are to keep the ego alive and to fuel the separated state. Of course many are cleverly concealed beneath a beneficent exterior.

If you’re a Course student/teacher then you’ll realize that our mission here is to unlearn everything we think we know including the identity we’ve mistaken as ‘me.’ And it’s not until we’re committed to unlearning that we begin to understand that the ‘I’ we thought we were didn’t have a clue what it really wanted. The ego is a self-perpetuating saboteur whose only goal is to keep us looking out there for something that will never deliver.

On the spiritual path what we often aim for is to transform our lives. And what we find difficult to grasp or accept is that no real transformation is possible at the level of form because the only place transformation can take place is in the mind.

The ego however, is constantly trying to transform us, others and situations. We have an addiction to transformation at the level of form and we’re not even conscious of it. We are constantly trying to improve our lives at the effect level and not at the cause level (mind). The real aim therefore for any serious spiritual seeker is to transcend our life. That means we acknowledge that change occurs only in the mind and that we surrender our beliefs and values to the Holy Spirit for reinterpretation. This is undoing the ego; undoing the belief in separation.

We will not know anything until we un-know. The ego can’t love, period. It cannot give Love and it can’t receive Love. And while we’re still mistaking the ego for the “I” we think we and others are, we’ll never know Love. Even the love we have for our children, partners, and parents is strongly tainted by an unconscious fear of loss and expectation.

Love and fear cannot co-exist together. So the best we can hope to attain in the ego state is a pseudo love that’s always under threat of loss through separation or death. Love transcends the body but how many of us really know and experience this consistently? Aren’t we devastated when we lose a loved one?

Wouldn’t you want to know a Love that couldn’t ever be terminated? Wouldn’t you want to feel just as close to your loved one while they’re on the other side of the world or after their body died? This is the level and perception of Love that the Course is offering us, not in another life-time but now, here in this life.

Jesus said that we could experience the same miraculous perception that he lived (and still does!) to share, not some time in the future but now.
 
On a personal note, Tomas and I have that miraculous experience of transformed Love. It is the fuel of our commitment to share our book and message with you. We have an unusual story of Love. We were guided to release the ego form of the union (marriage) in order to save the relationship.

So we’re now a divorced couple who absolutely adore each other! We had a (special) love that was miraculously transformed during the process outlined in what A Course in Miracles calls ‘The Development of Trust’ (The Manual for Teachers, page 9). And it’s this very process (the six stages of undoing the ego) that we so want to help facilitate by explaining in simple terms just what is likely to be involved at a practical level in these stages of spiritual awakening.

We are Love but we can’t possibly feel and know this until the one block to the awareness of Its presence is dismantled. And please don’t make the same mistake Tomas and I did many years ago. Don’t think that it’s remotely possible to keep your own will and experience real Love and abundance at the same time. It cannot be done and will inevitably lead to more suffering.

This idea of undoing who you think you are is a very threatening one. Because you think you’re going to sacrifice so much. The truth is that once you truly commit to this process, you grow to appreciate the absolute valuelessness of what you previously valued. You don’t lose anything; except your fear, distrust and need to control. And that’s when the absolute delight of realizing and receiving comes in!

You don’t just hope, you know that Holy Spirit’s Will is all you want and you’re overjoyed to recognize it as your own. The need to have, to get, to avoid, and to control, falls away and you see that you have no needs. There’s no doubt and there’s nothing to lose. There’s a genuine growing urge to give unconditionally because we no longer feel empty, we feel full.

We know that giving is receiving and we experience the principle that whatever we give only increases both for the giver and the receiver. And replacing the ego’s miscreations are the Holy Spirit’s inspired desires to give that arise from abundant gratitude leading to increasing gratitude as they are extended.

Now do you know what you want? And if this is really what you want then are you prepared to commit to undoing, to unlearning and listening to Holy Spirit’s Voice instead of the ego? If you are, then you will come to find an experience far more wonderful than your wildest imaginings. And what will it cost? It’ll cost nothing less than your self, the false ego self that is.

Nouk Sanchez and Tomas Vieira are the authors of best-seller Take Me to Truth, Undoing the Ego. You may purchase this book online at the Pathways of Light website.To visit Nouk and Tomas’ web site, go to: http://www.takemetotruth.com

© 2008, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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