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October-December, 2023

A Mind-Healing Partner

by Rev. Larry Glenz, Ordained Ministerial Counselor

I have a friend, Wynne Black, who is also a Pathways minister. A few days ago we were studying from the Text the section called The Correction of Error. It began with this sentence:

“The alertness of the ego to the errors of other egos is not the kind of vigilance the Holy Spirit would have you maintain.” (T-9.III.1:1)

I have some strong opinions about the actions of certain family members. I would like him/her/them to behave differently. And I have an important position in the family (father, father-in-law, husband, ex-husband, grandfather). For some reason, it seems I cannot always be perfectly happy with their situation or behavior as I see it.

The ego tells me it is right for the 73-year old patriarch of this family to speak up on what he sees as inappropriate or unacceptable. Certainly some wisdom has been gained and leadership is needed. No?

“To the ego it is kind and right and good to point out errors and ‘correct’ them.” (T-9.III.2:1)

“If you point out the errors of your brother’s ego you must be seeing through yours, because the Holy Spirit does not perceive his errors.” (T-9.III.3.1)

As my friend Wynne and I read this section, we both began to apply it to our frustrations with our families, ex-spouses, and in-laws. We were being told that there was definitely a better way to perceive all this.

“When a brother behaves insanely, you can heal him only by perceiving the sanity in him. If you perceive his errors and accept them, you are accepting yours.” (T-9.III.5:1-2)

My function is to forgive — to let go and let God. I do not know the way others should behave or live. My ego thinks it knows, though. And it thinks it is important that I give advice to others, although they have not asked for it. Perceiving the sanity in what seems dead wrong to me is what Holy Spirit is asking me to do. It takes training to be able to let go and let God — to forgive what appears to be errors in another.

“It is not up to you to change your brother, but merely to accept him as he is.” (T-9.III.6:4)

I had a son who was addicted to opiates for seven years. I did many things to try and help my son overcome his cravings and recover from his addiction. But he eventually relapsed from every recovery effort and died from an overdose.

I went to Holy Spirit often and asked what I should do. I was told by Spirit to just love him and see the goodness in him. Don’t condemn him. You don’t know what Kevin needs to go through in this life. Just love him. See his innocence, not his mistakes.

Sometimes I listened to Holy Spirit and other times I was too scared to do that. My ego had me using shame, guilt and anger to try and get him to stop. We fought verbally and physically.

“You will not escape paying the price for this, not because you are being punished for it, but because you are following the wrong guide and will therefore lose your way.” (T-9.III.6:8)

I regret the times that I was too scared to follow Spirit’s advice. But working with the Course, both alone and with others, I have learned that only the Love is real. Most parents feel tremendous guilt after losing a loved one after years of addiction, recovery and relapse. Forgiveness of myself and others is the cure.

“The Holy Spirit in you forgives all things in you and your brother.” (T-9.III.7:4)

My strong connection to Holy Spirit has allowed me to heal and to help others in my family heal from this tragedy. Forgiveness is the cure. Holy Spirit is the Source of all healing.

“He (Holy Spirit) will teach you how to see yourself without condemnation, by learning how to look on everything without it.” (T-9.III.8:10)

As my mind-healing partner and I continued to read this section on The Correction of Errors, we both started to observe how the ego has us giving unwanted advice and judgments on others. By sharing our challenges and lessons, we feel like we are gaining a better understanding of when we are following the ego or Holy Spirit. We feel Holy Spirit is working with us and through us.

And we are most grateful for our training with A Course in Miracles both in our self study and when sharing with another.

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