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May-August, 2024

Deciding with God

by Rev. Tacey Reese, Ordained Ministerial Counselor

I recently took one of the ACIM Practitioner Courses that is offered by Pathways of Light called The Power of Decision — Cause and Effect.

It helped me develop the practice of continually asking myself, “Am I deciding with God or am I deciding with the ego?” I noticed that ego decisions were reactive decisions, an automatic response to a perceived threat. Sometimes the threats were obvious and sometimes I would have to dig deep to find out what I was feeling threatened by.

I knew that if I was out of peace, I was feeling threatened in some way. That was a helpful insight. So, then I made the decision to respond rather than to react.

My first step in responding is to be willing to surrender to the Source of all Love to make my decision. And sometimes I had to ask to be willing to be willing!

I wanted to blame my feeling of fatigue on stress.

I wanted to blame my office landlord for not maintaining my office grounds in a tidy way that looks nice when people walk up to it.

I wanted to blame the new natural gas company that my state has switched over to for such a high bill and label someone there as greedy. My bill had certainly not been that high before! So, it must be some greedy person in the new company that caused that! I wasn’t sure who that someone was as I thought it so then I decided to blame ALL corporations for greediness!

Then later I was deliming my coffee pot and when I came back into the kitchen it had overflowed and the water was running toward the washing machine instead of being right there beside the counter.

As I examined this more closely, I could see that the flooring was not completely level. I started feeling very anxious, knowing I would need a professional to come look at it and see if I needed some flooring work. I didn’t know how I would pay for such an expense.

My mind started spiraling into egoic thoughts and then I saw I was still wanting to be a victim. That got my attention.

I realized that being a victim was a decision I made long, long ago, many lifetimes ago, or perhaps before the first lifetime.

I’m not really sure how that works but what I knew was that it was not a wise decision. It was wrong. I was wrong.

So, I let that belief go; I let that decision go. I chose a different decision by stepping back and remembering What I really Am. An extension of Love.

The question came to me, What would Love do? Love would let things be and follow Holy Spirit’s guidance. Love would extend and forgive. Love would overlook perceived threats and re-purpose those for mind healing. And that is what happens every time I decide with God.

Now I feel glad and grateful to have been wrong! I realized I was deciding wrongly because I was deciding on my own, which means deciding with ego.

When I want only the peace of God, I decide only with God. And I am willing to do this and only this. I know the day will dawn when this is my default mode of decision making and I am glad and grateful it is so!

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