January-March, 2025
When I awakened this week, I realized I needed to take a step back and be re-awakened to the observation that I feel like some of the peace I am striving to maintain has taken flight and been replaced by some irritation. I find that I am slipping back into needing to be right more than choosing peace! My identity sometimes gets caught up in needing to prove my point, but I want to live my true self and go back to my true Identity as Love and Light.
This fact had me running back to my Pathways of Light teachings in the course 905: Special Relationships vs. Holy Relationships. When I opened my notebook, I was led to page 3, paragraph 2 where it stated: “Either we come from oneness of Love as an extension of Love, or we come from the belief in separation – the ego. Specialness is not the real truth.”
Nothing makes me reevaluate myself quicker than the realization that when I am needing to be right in my conversations or relationships, I am acting from ego and a state of specialness. The result is me feeling and acting from a confused and split mind. I may have been searching for validation for knowing the “right” answer, but I traded in connection to others.
In reading page 3 in course 905 notebook, I referred back to reading the following in A Course In Miracles: “The more you approach the center of His thought system, the clearer the light becomes. The closer you come to the foundation of the ego’s thought system, the darker and more obscure becomes the way. Yet even the little spark in your mind is enough to lighten it. Bring this light fearlessly with you.” (T-11.in.3:4–7) These hopeful words from A Course in Miracles were just the catalyst I needed to remember to live in peace and light!
As the last paragraph on page 3 of my notebook states “The Holy Spirit is there to lead us. He just needs our willingness to step back and be receptive to his guidance.”
Another realization came to me with the help of Holy Spirit as I was sitting outdoors in the sunshine in quiet reflection to go to Holy Spirit. I saw an image of myself sitting quietly and peacefully, and taking a step back. I went into deep breathing where I practiced inhaling through my nose in count of 4, holding breath 1 second, then releasing air through mouth as I count down for 4 seconds and repeat 10 times. During this peaceful breathing, I was unable to verbalize any statements of disagreement or confrontation; I could just be in silence in the moment! I cannot be speaking if I am deep breathing!
I also asked Holy Spirit to help me collect a mental bag of go-to words to create peace in my relationships so that I can replace ego phrases such as “I don’t think so,” “that’s not right,” “ I disagree,” “I’m sure of it” with human connection phrases such as: “maybe,” “certainly could be,” “yeah,” “maybe so,” “possibly,” it’s possible,” and the all-important paramount word for me – “OK”! I now choose to just say the one word “OK.” To me it implies respect, says I am listening, asks the other person to carry on with their ideas. It does not hold a definite opinion or commitment if I need a little more time to reflect. Also, these positive phrases have helped reset me when I feel like verbalizing a long self-promoting sentence or tirade of how right I feel I am.
I have even tried adding the word peace after a phrase such as OK — peace, maybe so — peace, that could be — peace, maybe — peace! This technique keeps me on track of my true goal of staying in peace with Holy Spirit! The word OK is also a reset for me to take a deep breath and choose peace instead of feeling the need to be right!
I also received a visual of clouds representing thoughts floating by with no attachment of anger or confrontation when I hear and perceive a statement that may be different from my perspective. I now look forward to a new perspective of another’s opinion as I can always be open to learning when in peace! I don’t have to be in total agreement to say “OK.” This is my code word to listen with respect and kindness.
Today I even tried out a phrase that I have never said before in my life: “I agree to agree!” This phrase reminds me that with agreement, I agree to be open to new learning, listen with respect to the opinion of others, and be kind and supportive, even if I come from a different opinion and perspective. As I remember this statement and say it with sincerity, I receive the gift of peace and harmony!
Rev. Vicki Evans, O.M.C., is a Pathways of Light minister living in Dallas, Texas. Email: .(JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address) Phone: 713-775-9153
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