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January-March, 2007

True Balance

by Rev. Cheryl Ford

It seems that on the path of spiritual enlightenment we are always trying to find some sense of balance in regard to our spirituality and the world of form. Jesus’ interpretation of balance in Tom & Linda Carpenter’s book, Dialogue on Awakening says, “Attempting to achieve a sense of balance between the infinite and the finite intellectually is much like juggling a combination of feathers and bowling balls.”

To me, this statement is so true, and I became painfully aware of it over the last week when I felt inundated with attempting to balance work, family and spiritual practice. I actually had an insane schedule for work that required a lot of advanced planning, paperwork, driving and full day meetings that exhausted me mentally and greatly reduced my connection with Holy Spirit.

Basically, although the meetings themselves were always quite wonderful with kind and pleasant people, in between meetings I found myself feeling overwhelmed and irritable. I felt pressed for time and reactive. I even found myself complaining to friends and family about how busy I was and how put upon I felt!

Ironically, two weeks ago I wrote in my journal about being in God’s grace and recited a quote from the Course that said, once the “table is prepared, it [grace] is inevitable and will come instantly to the alter [mind] that is clean and holy for the gift.” (ACIM) In light of my experience, I really learned a lesson about the real meaning of that quote.

As I mentioned earlier, I noticed that my connection with Spirit seemed greatly reduced. If it were strong, I believe I would have remembered that feeling overwhelmed is simply a trick the ego plays on the mind. In reality, we are totally capable, unlimited beings who have access to the endless energy supply of the universe.

The Course says, ‘in a state of God’s grace we can dip into oneness whenever we want to bring back the light with us…’ Yet, I felt I was not receiving this ‘gift’ because I was simply not making a space for it at my table.

According to the Course, ‘peace comes to the quiet mind,’ the mind that is receptive and open. Holy Spirit will never barge His way in uninvited. But if we can only show a little willingness, and find a center within us somewhere where we can sit with Him awhile, He is there.

By the end of the week, this idea became crystal clear… In retrospect, I did notice little ways that Spirit attempted to throw me a life raft. One way was the unexpected arrival of a full copy of the Peace Pilgrim’s biography that I had requested months ago and had completely forgotten about. Reading about her dedication to service and cheerful exploits while walking 25,000 miles on foot gave me a lot of comfort, as well as wonderful reminders of what it means to be committed to Spirit.

Another life raft was the ‘Tuesdays with Spirit’ program online at ACIM Gather. The opportunity to join each week with amazing like-minded individuals around the world in a learning-teaching forum is an incredible blessing! It also provided a dedicated space and time that I had to commune with Spirit together with others.

Another was a conference call with Pathways of Light in Kiel, for the development of POL-UK. Chatting with other ministers and friends was productive and heart-warming and helped me to feel that I was being led in my ministry. There was also a wonderful training call with two other ministers where I’m learning to facilitate a spiritual relationships counseling program.

Lastly, was the loving, gentle teaching directly from Spirit over the weekend that reminded me to stay in present moment awareness, and to remember that I do not have to look forward to things anxiously with a feeling of dread. After all, what is impossible for me is completely possible with God, and I am never alone.

There is a poem called ‘Footprints in the Sand,’ where an old man with Jesus looks back on the years of his life and witnesses two sets of prints in the sand during the good times, but only one set during the hard times. The man turns to Jesus and says, ‘I notice your footprints along with mine during the good times of my life, but where were you during the bad times?’ Jesus responds kindly, “It was then that I carried you.”

This poem always brings a tear to my eye when I think of the tenderness of God’s Love and how often I simply don’t notice. I vainly attempt to ‘balance’ truth and illusion and the two are just not compatible; like feathers and bowling balls. I’m so grateful to know that Spirit is always with me and all I need do is remember Him.

© 2007, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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